I'm 32 years old. What advise do you wish you were given at this age?

[ThirtyTwo1988]

I am married, with one child. I have a decent job, but still renting. Diagnosed anxiety disorder, but generally happy and confident. Lots of acquaintances, but little close friends (if any).

Any life advice?

Stop sunbathing if you do now.

• Don’t rack up debt due to frivolous spending
• Wear a high spf on your face everyday
• Start doing yoga
• Do not care about what others think of you (I wasted a lot of my 30s doing this!)
• Look after your teeth
• Eat well. Learn to cook if you can’t already
• Drink 2 litres of water a day
• Cultivate friendships and hang on to good ones

If you are married make sure both of you know everything about all your finances. (Having stuff in your name is meaningless if you are married - the law says it's held in common).

Be prepared to change career at some stage - you'll be working till you are mid 60's, the job you're doing now may not exist in 30 years' time.

Have a 'Just in case' letter somewhere with your passwords, phone numbers of important contacts etc. Make sure your husband/other important people know where it is. Memorise key mobile phone numbers (husband, parents, best friend). Get a key safe and tell important people the code for it.

Fill in the In Case of Emergency bit on your smartphone.

I also agree about friendships, friends are important.
Don’t build your whole life around your husband.

I'm 33 and really enjoying this thread. Some people are taking some parts too personally though, I don't agree with all the advice, some of it is validating and other bits I am going to consider!

This thread sounds like the Wear Sunscreen song!

Be selfish, it’s not actually selfish at all... if there’s something you want to do and you keep stopping yourself because you’re worried about the perceived impact it’ll have on your husband, stop, do it. It will enrich your life, make you a happier person to be married to and therefore enrich your whole family. Ditto to not giving up anything you enjoy because you think it’ll take time pressure off your family. I bitterly regret giving up rock climbing for instance, i did it so that weekends would be family time but now in hindsight I would’ve had a much ticker social circle, I could’ve got the kids into early so they’d have had a fabulous healthy hobby and I’d be healthier and happier than I am now... now all we do is lie on the sofa watching fucking telly anyway so we really didn’t gain anything and instead of my husband moaning about me being away for a couple of hours on a Saturday he moans about how we don’t do anything at the weekends 🙄🙄🙄

CherryCherries Such an amazing song isn’t it?

Yes it is a great song!

I'd say take every opportunity you can education wise. If your job offers extra training/qualification opportunities, take it, even if you're not sure it's interesting or worried about time. On that note, don't worry about how much time something will take because thr time will pass anyway..! The more strings to your bow the better!

Place marking.

I'm 28 with no savings, never had a career or any skills, 1 child and in insecure housing. I want to die.

@FrostedCranberries

Place marking.

I'm 28 with no savings, never had a career or any skills, 1 child and in insecure housing. I want to die.

Please don't say that 💔 I'm in a vaguely similar situation and of similar age. Let's use the thread to help us in any way possible.

I felt like that at 27, I was a uni student, mum to an 8 year old and living in rented accommodation with a landlord that wouldn’t pay his mortgage. Everything worked out ok for me. 28 is still really young.

Glad things worked out for you.

@FrostedCranberries - you sound really unhappy, I’m very concerned that you say you want to die. So Please start your own thread and you will get good advice tailored to your own situation.

@FrostedCranberries

At your age I was just separated from the husband, had a four year old dd, no education to speak of, no career...

It's decades later now. I got the qualifications, became a teacher, bought a house...

I worked damned hard. Too hard. But I'm still here. So, you can do this. Take a more measured approach than me, but don't die. Have a good life with your dc and gradually improve your position. If I can, you can.

Look after your teeth.
The advice about walking away is great. Until you've walked away from so many awful jobs that you don't have it in you to do it all again so you stay in the shitty job. And you don't know what you actually would like to do.
Also support yourself as it's not always possible to walk away from a relationship you're unhappy with.