Would you report,confront or leave if you know someone is stealing from their workplace?

[thecatmother]

I have found out that my close friend 's ex partner was regularly stealing from their workplace. He is a manager in a private care facility for adults with complex neurological disabilities.
She told me that whilst they were together they never paid their food bills, he would go to the supermarket or wholesale and shop there, incorporating their shopping into it (they have 3 children, just for the information). Same with diesel, he would drive the van from the facility and she would follow in their car and fill both up and pay from the work money. He would take cash from work and replace it with receipts from somewhere etc. I'm sure there's much more to it... obviously she is not innocent thats why she has only now mentioned it to me ,and they haven't been together for long time. They have a relationship where he controls her still and anything to do with their children, she was SAHM and is working part time now, so she does need his support. She is also worried that she will be hold accountable and could potentially loose her children.
I am her friend, so I know him very well, he is a very good manipulator, most of his work stories are about how proud of himself he is, what an amazing job he does, how he "fights" at the meetings for more funding... I am so angry! My brother in law has aggressive MS , he is only 37 ! My sister has lost her husband to an illness, she relies heavily on his respite facility and it is very expensive for them. And to find out that this man has been treating his duty as a care provider to the vulnerable and their families as means to enrich himself makes me feel sick.
Of course I promised my friend not to say anything, and I wouldn't even know who to say anything to and how. And I realise that if I confront him he might do something bad to her , financially or emotionally.

I'm just ranting here instead!

You don't work for this company, it is nothing to do with you. They will have accountants, managers, supervision arrangements etc. It is up to them to keep an eye on their employees. If you report him and he ends up in prison your friend will not thank you. Park this in a part of your mind labelled "things said in drink" and let it go.

You don't work for this company, it is nothing to do with you.

I don’t understand mindset.Of course it’s to do with her. It’s to do with all of us.

I feel strongly about it because

1. this is not stealing office supplies from a huge brand (I'm not condoning that either), it is stealing directly from the people who rely on this service because of a big tragedy in their lives.
2. it is not cheap to have your family member to be looked after privately, many have to forget about a lot of joys of life.
3. my friend might be a part of it indirectly, but she is in general fear of that man. However, I am not going to run with it, at least not just yet, I feel that I need to learn more , and see if she is willing to talk.

Don’t confront him, but do report it. He’s the lowest of the low, stealing from vulnerable people, which is exactly what he’s doing indirectly. What an absolute cunt (and I fk g often call people a cunt)