I've developed a huge fear and it's consuming me

[TurningOfTheWheel]

Please can someone just read this and maybe give me some realistic words. This has been making me ill for about 6-8 weeks and I don't know if I'm going mad or if I really do have something to worry about. I have anxiety anyway but I think being at home most of the time and working from home has compounded this.

I've developed an obsession with thinking about all the 'terms and conditions' and things I've agreed to in the past, whether it was personal things (social media, online shopping etc) or on behalf of work (I sometimes have to order things and buy things on behalf of work). I worry programmes and things I've used that I thought were free, weren't really free.

In the past I've rarely read the Ts & Cs, but now I'm thinking.... what if I have agreed to something in the past and I didn't know it
? What if a huge bill is going to come to me or work because I didn't read the small print?

It's driving me mad and I'm looking back at things I did 6 months, a year, 2 years ago and madly googling because I'm so scared a huge invoice is going to come. I'm thinking, I'll have to declare myself bankrupt if that happens.

I've even started calling companies I haven't dealt with in over a year and asking them to delete all my information, but I'm scared I've missed something.

Can bills come for things after a long period of time? A year after, or more?

I feel the worst I've ever felt mentally, and sometimes I feel this life is not worth living if I live with this intense anxiety in my head.

Should say ‘anything’ not ‘ it’ in my first sentence

I understand why you feel this way OP but I have never, ever heard of someone who was tricked into agreeing to pay for something by not reading the terms and conditions. If this were common you would hear of it happening and there would be warnings about it as there are for scams and things.

Yes sounds like ocd i have it too but with different things its horrible and debilitating i take sertraline and its helped so much maybe try and get a gp appointment
Hope it gets better x

Sorry you’re having such a hard time. You have nothing to worry about re the terms and conditions but you should see your GP ASAP for your anxiety - agreed it sounds like it could be OCD or similar

I can completely relate to this, and yes its OCD. I haven't had it about T&Cs but have had and do have it about other things. Lived with it for ages now but would love to be rid of it.

Hi there -
Another here to say please talk to GP,
It sounds like you are experiencing OCD intrusive thoughts and / or worry (generalised anxiety disorder)
Both respond really well to medication and CBT that can be accessed on NHS
Best wishes,
Thoughts / worries are not facts
They are hypothetical
Problem solve real problems when they arise
Disengagement from worries
But CBT will help you with all that 👍

It does sound a lot like OCD - unfortunately I have similar worries about other things.

In your case however the following two things might be reassuring:

1. the statute of limitations is 6 years in the UK

2. UCTA is the unfair terms and conditions act and it means that a court would acknowledge that in most cases the company has far more power than the individual and you don't have an option to negotiate T&Cs (eg when signing up to Netflix) and will take that into account if something ever came to court.

Also if it's a T&Cs issue remember it's a civil and not a criminal matter.

I hope you feel better soon OP - I know how debilitating these things can be.

It's ocd, see your GP. My friend has this exact type. It's hideous, I feel for you.

1. it's caused by stress so instead of trying to solve the 'terms and conditions' problem, take some time out, do things you enjoy, and get some physiological rest and recuperation
2. instead of thinking /ruminating about each individual worry, see 'worry' as a behavior you are choosing to do and want to do less of. Notice when you start doing it and use distractions
3. Just because you, think' something, it doesn't have much importance and you can safely ignore it. You are poorly, and placing importance on unimportant things because it is a displacement for real life problems.
4. I would encourage your friends and family not to engage in reassuring you or discussing all the reasons. It won't help. All the best. Look for a CBT therapist and if you want to consider medication some anti depressants are better for ocd than others.

I really sympathise. I had a bout of this earlier this year over a new speed camera on my route to work.

I was convinced I'd accidentally clocked up fines before I first saw it and would lose my licence. The arrival of the post each day made me tense.

I hadn't, but it was a strangely consuming worry for a little while. It was like I needed something concrete to attach the anxiety I was feeling to.

Echo the advice to see your doctor. Hope it goes away soon.

It does sound like OCD. CBT could really help, and/or medication might just make it go away like that - that can happen.

To address your fear, I have never in my life read T&Cs in full, I've signed and registered with hundreds of things and no one has ever come after me for money or something alarming that I'd agreed to, and I'm 50+. That's because anything normal, like a hire purchase, buying tickets, a loan, installing software etc, as long as it's a legal and reputable company, will have their legalese all checked and approved and things that are there to catch people out wouldn't be seen as sensible. If it's something major like a mortgage or car purchase, they go through it with you and point out anything you need to know.

Things like Fabletics where people have found they'd signed up to automatically make more purchases, end up with bad publicity - and even then that wouldn't bankrupt you.

Of course, that doesn't mean you shouldn't be careful - always check when you shop online that it's an htpps// site, don't believe any email that asks for money out of the blue, always double-check the destination bank account when you pay large sums to contractors and all that. Don't lend money to a new online romance you've never met, or a Nigerian prince who says you're due to inherit. But T&Cs you've signed should not be a problem.

I do sympathise though because I understand the agony of out-of-control anxiety, and it's hard to rationally argue yourself out of. Low-dose medication controls mine. So please do see the GP because you could get rid of this soon.

You're fine OP. Nobody reads all the long terms and conditions, nobody. There is no scam I have ever heard of that involves hiding some illegal clause to take money at the bottom of the T & Cs, and if that did happen, it's so unethical that you would have to be given the money back anyway x

If you are still worried, think of it statistically - out of all the tens of thousands of women on mumsnet, no one has come on your thread to say yes this has happened to them with terrible results. What is the statistical chance of it happening to you, the one person on here who has intrusive thoughts about it? Statistically it is all but impossible. x