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Original poster

Told friend she is unreasonable to expect others to act as her free taxi service

44 replies

PandemicAtTheDisco · 25/12/2020 12:13

My friend is outraged her daughter's ex MIL won't be her unpaid taxi today. The daughter's ex MIL lives near her daughter, has other things to do today as hosting her own family and wants to drink later on. She could get a taxi but will need to pay £20 each way and doesn't want to pay.

She is now at home, on her own, sulking. She doesn't even get on with her daughter's ex MIL but just can't see she is unreasonable to expect her to drop everything to accommodate her wishes. I wasn't outraged enough in solidarity so am now being given the silent treatment too.

Am I a bad friend for not seeing her POV?

OP posts:

GabsAlot · 25/12/2020 14:33

does your friend just sit there and expect to be offered lifts by people she hardly knows

VettiyaIruken · 25/12/2020 14:37

That's some sense of entitlement your friend has. You did the right thing by not agreeing with her. She needs a reality check.

billy1966 · 25/12/2020 14:42

@RandomMess

She basically expect a person she has a vague connection to run her around on Christmas day.

Utterly delusional!!

This.

Hilarious OP.

Original poster

PandemicAtTheDisco · 25/12/2020 14:45

People do go the extra mile for me and I really appreciate it. She seems to expect it.

I've heard nothing for a while so I assume she has now been picked up and transported via a paid for taxi.

I had my first text from her this morning just after 9. Everyone else sent Christmas messages; she was upset.

OP posts:

Emelene · 25/12/2020 15:05

Also ... we are in the middle of a pandemic!! Not a great idea to be sharing cars with acquaintances.

The relationship sounds quite draining for you OP? I think I'd be taking a step back...

AcornAutumn · 25/12/2020 15:24

@Emelene

Also ... we are in the middle of a pandemic!! Not a great idea to be sharing cars with acquaintances.

The relationship sounds quite draining for you OP? I think I'd be taking a step back...

If you want to go that route 🙄 then safer than a taxi.

Original poster

PandemicAtTheDisco · 25/12/2020 22:02

Thanks @AcornAutumn

I have reread my half of the text messages and actually think I was very tactful and sympathetic - I just didn't join in with all her comments about how selfish, cruel and nasty her daughter's ex MIL was being. I did get a Christmas message a few texts in our conversation.

I suspect there is more to the story than she has told me. There always is and she leaves out her part in them. I've stepped back a lot in the last few years but still have some good memories of our shared past. It's hard to completely let go of the friendship but these days I don't get much from it.

I think she thrives on all the drama she creates whilst I just want everything nice, calm and relaxing. I am enjoying being given the silent treatment.

OP posts:

AcornAutumn · 25/12/2020 23:19

Oh I have zero time for the drama lovers!

Selttan · 26/12/2020 01:06

So hold on she wanted a lift from ex-MIL to her daughters house not even ex-MILs house?

How weird.

Pipandmum · 26/12/2020 01:27

I don't understand why her daughter didn't arrange either herself or her partner to collect her mother. I would not have expected my mother to taxi over - I would have collected her, and if i couldn't for whatever reason, would have arranged a taxi for her (not that she was incapable but because she was my mother).

nosswith · 26/12/2020 08:28

'Lives near'. Near enough to do this thing called walking? And only make the journey in daylight?

Original poster

PandemicAtTheDisco · 27/12/2020 06:05

I've been told a completely different story today that bears no relation to yesterday's text messages and goes against my previous knowledge of many things about her family.

I have no idea what to say to her anymore.

OP posts:

JoeWicksSurvivor · 27/12/2020 06:17

She sounds a CF - best to say nothing and slowly withdraw all contact or block if you can. Not fair that she drains you and brings you down.

AcornAutumn · 27/12/2020 11:11

@PandemicAtTheDisco

I've been told a completely different story today that bears no relation to yesterday's text messages and goes against my previous knowledge of many things about her family.

I have no idea what to say to her anymore.

Probably nothing is best

Goodbye2020Hello2021 · 27/12/2020 11:16

A wants to visit B today
B lives near C
A wants C to give her a lift to B's house

A is nuts.

CoraPirbright · 27/12/2020 11:25

How has the story changed? This whole thing is so weird - the level of entitlement is off the scale!

MissConductUS · 27/12/2020 12:25

People who don't have a car of their own often have no idea how expensive they are to run with insurance, petrol, maintenance, and repairs, etc. She's still a massive CF to expect rides on demand.

WonderingFree · 27/12/2020 12:37

So what happened OP? Did A get from A to
B via C or did B go to C’s whilst A stayed at A?

Original poster

PandemicAtTheDisco · 27/12/2020 16:39

I was told that despite her text clearly saying the daughter's ex MIL - C had let her down by not giving her a lift - it was B - her daughter who let her down as B can apparently now drive and owns a car.

To my knowledge - B does not drive and does not have a car. As far as I know she cannot drive for medical reasons and I can't imagine that changing. Her daughter's friend has a car but expecting her to drive is almost the same as expecting the daughter's ex MIL to drive. But why mention her friend's name and be angry at her? Daughter's friend may be new female partner but she was with her own family on Christmas day.

Apparently she had pre-booked the taxis but the first one was late so she was trying to get a lift at the last minute from the daughter/daughter's friend and not the daughter's ex-MIL. Apparently the taxi then turned up very late so she eventually got to B's but missed the presents being opened.

Taxis are impossible this time of year. They need to be pre-booked weeks in advance and if you try to get one on Christmas day without pre-booking then you are generally waiting an hour or more before they can fit you in.

Then apparently she was supposed to be staying overnight but they'd cancelled at last minute (last year they said no more overnight stays at the daughter's house and I doubt that changed). Apparently they'd told her at last minute she couldn't stay over so she would have had to change taxi bookings if so - but she never mentioned that.

Also the daughter had previously said she would drive but then was drinking the day before so refused to drive the next day (despite daughter not driving/or having car) - but if taxis pre-booked then how?

The daughter previously never has more than two drinks because of her medication.

It doesn't make sense. It sounds like she's trying to rearrange the narrative so that she doesn't appear to be in the wrong. She's not quite got the story pinned down. I think in a few days she'll have thought out all the holes.

OP posts:

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