I need some perspective, friend ignoring me

[SpaceRaiders]

This is so ridiculously petty. Friend and I have a usually easy friendship, which if I’m
completely honest is often on her terms. We’ve holidayed together, we have kids of similar ages who get on well.

So over the last month I’ve been a bit preoccupied with work and equally she’s had a tricky time with various things. Without going into it, someone breached their contract which has led to a slightly sticky financial business situation that I’ve been trying to get resolved. It’s been fairly stressful but I haven’t talked about it in great detail, I’ve let her vent about her stuff all the times I’ve seen her.

So now I have this last minute urgent meeting to sign documents at my solicitors office first thing Monday morning. I saw her last week, asked her to have dc for a few hours so that I can go to London, sign docs and rush back. I told her it’d be a massive favour but equally she shouldn’t worry if she couldn’t help, I’d see if my usual options were available. She was like that’s fine, I’m happy to have your dc, she then says, could you have mine on return on Tuesday? So I agree. Our dc get on really well so it’s never been a problem.

It turns out I have to be in London for 9am which would mean dropping off my dc to hers at 7.45/8. I acknowledged it was early and asked her if she’d mind. She gets back to me and says no, it’s far too early to expect her family to be up at that time. I say that’s completely fine - (laughing emoji). I then quickly make other arrangements. I later tell her that I’ve shifted things around to make sure I can keep my Monday commitments, but I’d now not be able to have her dc the following day as my dc now have a commitment which I’d just rescheduled from the Monday to the Tuesday. She then calls me and basically tells me off for being quick to make other arrangements. I apologise and then say it really isn’t a big deal. I’m a little taken aback at her reaction to be quite honest. She then sends me another message that night, which I responded to but she hasn’t replied since.

Without drip feeding I have ASD and I generally find people who aren’t direct rather tricky to decipher. So tell me, what did I do wrong here.

Your friend is like you said, has the friendship on her own terms.
She sounds selfish.

I dont get what getting the whole family up too earlu thing, your dc can sit quietly in the livingroom reading or playing a game with headphones on and she could tell her family to put clothes on when they get up as you will have guests.

You are helping her out with a financial situation and will be returning the favour!

She is annoyed that she cant benefit from using you on Tuesday and now has to rejig her diary.

You didn’t do anything wrong, it’s just an arrangement that didn’t work out.

She presumably expected you wouldn’t find anyone else to take your kids so early on Monday, so you’d have to come back to her, and that would allow her to keep her Tuesday childcare.

I think you just need to leave it (presuming you’ve explained you couldn’t shift your times). Sounds like she needs to learn a bit more give and take so you’ve given her that opportunity!

She's not happy about Tuesday. It's her fault for not bending a bit to help you out on Monday. 7.45am is early but a good friend would do it as a one off as it's obviously an urgent situation for you. Who knows when she might need a similar inconvenient favour from you.
Forget it op. You've done nothing wrong.