Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Flip

Original poster

Leaving my partner financial support for my son

13 replies

Samsophia · 16/12/2020 00:13

I am currently living with my partner and we have a 3 year old son. He has a daughter who he doesn't pay maintenance for. The mother receives all benefits for her and he has never claimed benefits for her. I am planning to leave him but want things in place as much as possible before I go. My partner is self employed he liquidated his previous company and started a new company this year. He owns 5 properties none of which are in his name all in a family members name. All savings are in his childrens names I have asked about support for my son he has said we will see. I have taken copies of what I can whilst I am here. I am not working at present, I gave up my job once my maternity pay ended. I own my own house that is currently rented any advice on an exit stratergy and financial support that I could get. I know legal fees are expensive but have been told I can get an initial consultation for free? Any advice or suggestions would be greatly appreciated thanks

OP posts:

TheFormerPorpentinaScamander · 16/12/2020 00:23

Why doesn't he pay for his DD?
Contact the CMS but it sounds like he knows how to hide his income :(
Apply for UC.

Original poster

Samsophia · 16/12/2020 01:03

The mother for his DD threatened to mess him up as she knows about everything about him. He decided to let her keep the benefits not pay CS .

OP posts:

Aquamarine1029 · 16/12/2020 01:15

How quickly can you get your renters out? Do you still need to pay a mortgage? If you're not married, what do you need a solicitor for? You can just apply for maintenance.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

Family law Relationship problems

caringcarer · 16/12/2020 01:26

If he does not pay towards upkeep of first child it is unlikely he will pay towards second child. He is not a very good parent.

TheFormerPorpentinaScamander · 16/12/2020 03:21

Benefits and CM have nothing to do with each other sounds like he's pulled a number on you :(

Dyrne · 16/12/2020 03:37

If you are not married you are not entitled to any of his assets upon a split.

What benefits negate him paying child maintenance? If she is the primary carer she is eligible for child benefit anyway, nothing to do with maintenance. Other benefits are income based so nothing to do with him. Sounds like he’s been feeding you bollocks there.

You’d be the same if you moved out. If he is self employed it sounds like trying to pinpoint his income for child maintenance would be tricky so good idea trying to find evidence now.

Claiming benefits when you own property gets complicated but put your circumstances into the calculator on entitledto.org and it should give you an idea. In all likelihood you’re going to have to investigate going back to work.

ChristmasUserName2020 · 18/12/2020 17:27

Try for CM through CMS but it sounds as though he’s trying the usual trick of self employed people (men) to get out of paying. Slow. Hand. Clap. 👏 👏 👏 Sounds like a right knob and I doubt you’ll get anything. I certainly didn’t as soon as my ex went SE in 2012.

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 18/12/2020 17:31

What rubbish has he told you..what benefits do you think he isn’t claiming for and doing his baby mother a favour ?

VettiyaIruken · 18/12/2020 17:34

Assuming you are in the UK , he's talking shit. Child maintenance doesn't affect benefits like UC and the like.

He's lying to you.
He doesn't put a scrap of food in his daughter's mouth and he'll not put a scrap in his son's.

Everything in other people's names. What a lying scumbag he is.

PotteringAlong · 18/12/2020 17:36

You need to get a job ASAP. One way or the other you need some income coming in.

Santaisironingwrappingpaper · 18/12/2020 17:36

Report him to hmrc as financial gain from rentals should he declared.

lyralalala · 18/12/2020 17:42

@Samsophia

The mother for his DD threatened to mess him up as she knows about everything about him. He decided to let her keep the benefits not pay CS .

If the child lives with her mother then he's fed you a massive load of bullshit.

The child's mother gets benefits because she has the child. Paying maintenance would make zero difference to those benefits

He's shown you who he is in how he treats the mother of his DD. It's highly likely he'll treat you the same.

breatheinskipthegym · 18/12/2020 18:12

Get copies of his bank statements as evidence for the CMS that he does in fact have an income. Pass them also to HMRC, no reason why the rest of society should suffer his greed and shoulder the burden of his evaded tax.

Plan to receive zero from him, and do whatever you need to be financially independent. Do not Arran your finances in any way that has any sort of reliance on him, no matter what he tells you.

Flip