What crazy things did you believe as a child?

[SinkGirl]

Just been discussing this with DH after realising that DT1 thinks that putting on his coat in the morning magically makes the school bus appear.

We were remembering things we believed as children, some courtesy of adult fibs but others... who knows?

Here’s some of ours:

• That the kidneys in steak and kidney pie are not actually kidneys, they just have the same name
  
• That the moon is only a few metres above our heads (blame the grandparent who said the moon was the same size as the dining table, plus child logic)
  
• That all cats are female and all dogs are male, or (much weirder) that poos are gentlemen and wees are ladies (this was me, and I have literally no idea where this came from - I even remember imagining a cartoon poo in a top hat, so I’m wondering if it was something I saw in a book?)
  

Obviously aside from Santa, Easter bunny etc, what obviously bonkers things did you believe as a child?

[Daisy829]

Love that @Helpel

[EternalOptimist7]

Another vote for if the wind changes your face will stay like that
I used to genuinely believe that if you walked on “ cracked” earth, crocodiles would pop up from the ground & get you!
When I had flushed the toilet, I believed if I didn’t get back to my room by the time I’d counted to 20, a monster would get me
I genuinely believed that celestial choirs sang outside my bedroom window at night. Apparently this is a thing! It was beautiful.
Your hair would curl if you ate burnt toast
My Mum caught real toads in the garden to make toad in the hole
Square eyes from watching too much tv

[NeedToKnow101]

@user1471565182

Yeah I thought you had to get married at 17 and I remember laying in bed worrying about it

Lol and me! And I thought that I would have to get up really early to put on a full face of make-up in the morning before my husband woke up. (Like the ladies in Dallas).

[tistheseasonnottocoughin]

I used to think that the street lights were turned on here by the people waking up on the other side of the world, that there was a whole office of people in Australia in charge of our lights and then we did the same for them

[NeedToKnow101]

When I was really small I used to think I could chose literally who I could be once I got older.

I used to think I was supposed to be born in the rainforest, but while I was waiting to be born another soul jumped the queue and got the parents I was supposed to have, and I got theirs (in London).

I thought sex education meant we would have to watch a couple having sex on the teacher's desk.

[AaronCardigan]

I thought the teachers lived at school. I thought they slept in the school library at night time.

I'm another one who used to pelt it back to bed before the toilet finished flushing because I was scared of the toilet monster.

[MotherPiglet]

If you ran the tap and water came out it meant noone else was using a sink elsewhere. My DM meant in the house, I took it as in the world and was like this is amazing, imagining Africa, Australia, etc

[growyourown77]

I always thought a TO LET sign was for a toilet...until I was in my teens! My family never corrected me....

[YesPleaseMary]

My mum told me that peas were full of vitamin P.

I believed this until a couple of years ago when I mentioned it to DH, who then nearly died laughing at me. Phoned my mum to chide her, she denied all knowledge.

[EarthWonderer]

That when it rained, it rained all over the world at the same time.

That the horizon I could see from the top of the hill on my street was the end of the world.

That when I asked my dad where he'd been and his reply was 'up a tree in the park' aka mind your own business I really thought he had been.

That a spaceman lived in the airing cupboard at the top of the stairs in our house.

That if you stepped on the cracks in the pavement, you'd turn into an elephant!

That all televisions went off at 5.30pm each day...... found out years later it was mum flicking the switch at the wall, to stop us watching too much.....Oh how innocent we were!

[Piratedoor]

I was convinced I was going to be told I was actually a witch with magic powers when I turned 18 😄 didn't happen unfortunately

[FiveGensOfLove]

@DaisyDreaming me too! Thought I was the only one
I also thought whenever you had a poo it could be a baby - so I’d always check the loo afterwards, just in case. This continued for longer than I’m comfortable admitting....

[TheGremlinsAreComing]

My gran told me that when you phone the speaking clock it's the Queen telling you the time. I believed that for YEARS!

[Amerimoon]

I thought the motorway was a magic road. That was because it seemed to me that we always entered it, drove the same way and eventually ended up in all the different places we wanted to go.

[JovialNickname]

That if you went to sleep with any of your arms or legs outside the covers, a witch would come and bite them off

[OhTheTastyNuts]

That Margaret Thatcher and Arthur Scargill were married! I was so shocked when I saw her with her actual husband.

[Amerimoon]

Also believed we came with a name that we found out on our birth certificate. So your parents found out your name when you were born rather than naming you.

[Holyjinglebells]

If you fart in the bath it immediately turns into liquid farts, therefore you'd be bathing in your own fart...... I stood up for years after my sister told me this

[Sideorderofchips]

That my life would be simpler when I grew up.

That being an adult would be fun

That when I got married it would be forever

[MrsBobDylan]

My lovely little six year old told me yesterday that he was hoping by to be chosen as 'Class Ambassador' at school today. I told him that there were 29 other children who could get it and that he shouldn't get his hopes up.

He told me that he can make things happen just by thinking about it and wanting it and that was his plan.

Well today readers, he got his wish and probably thinks he has magic powers 😂

[copperoliver]

Carrots make you see if the dark, x

[MrsBobDylan]

...maybe he does

[Buzlightyear1]

My mum told me that the hay in fields covered with plastic to keep them dry . She used to tell us they were black bags growing in fields .

She also had a plant she called a cheese plant and once a year she would put triangle cheese on it overnight and then when we woke up . She would go oh look the cheese has grown again🤦‍♀️😂

Loads of stuff my mum was very good at these things😂

[legalseagull]

That the world was actually black and white in 'olden times' like on tv.

That cities like London were inhabited by monkeys before we evolved in to humans.

[Ginsmything]

That the classical music that my dad listened to on the radio was from a live orchestra in the studio, I wondered how they all fitted in.