What made you grow as a person?

[YellowEllis]

Doesn't have necessarily be a situation, but a realisation, thought process etc. What made you grow as a person?

That my parents are people in their own right. My dad had a difficult childhood which affected him throughout his adult life. Understanding his life and viewing him as a child, I completely understand how hard things must have been for him. I want to love and care for that child.
This understanding/realisation allows me to forgive some of the things he did/choices he made as an adult.

Reading, traveling, living alone, living abroad
Therapy, becoming a parent, professional career with increasing responsibility, volunteering, trauma (eg abuse, divorce, infertility).

I was independent from an early age but growing up is something that came in stages for me as I tackled various of life's tasks.

I started very gradually to stop feeling sorry for myself and started to respect myself.
Also accepting that I have caused other people pain and made mistakes.
Getting all the dark swirling stuff out and into the light, and looking at it all with acceptance.

Learning about introversion.

Everything fell into place.

Therapy! And lots of it

Getting a dog! I suddenly had a whole other being to be responsible for - it made me a much better, and less self obsessed person.

Career progression, taking on more responsibilities, reading, children, different challenges

Losing friends, having my daughter, forgiving family for past trauma and letting go of anger, understanding why I made mistakes and forgiving myself

Sticking with tough periods at work when I wasn’t performing well. Sticking with a long term relationship. Reading stuff that makes you think differently and that you learn from. Having children.

Having DS, and then finding dp held some pretty vile misogynistic views that he had kept to himself until he thought I couldn't leave.

Knowing I was going to have to go it alone and then realising I actually didn't mind.

Not great at school, low confidence, very shy, ect, then started sixth form and started to mix more with peers that were better to get along with, then started to notice that everyone was different and even the people that were perceived as "popular or cool" all had different personalities and confidence levels, then I started to be interested in psychology profiling and seeing eg different strategies, strengths weaknesses ect in people dynamics, then started to see that from being part of conversations, that regardless of popularity ect people usually had something to say about x so it seemed no Matter how you presented your skills and abilities ect there was usually a critique, after that it seemed the best way was to embrace any strangeness about myself, and then just be me, rather than trying to just seak approval from the dominant group, admittedly I do still try to blend in rather than be an island, as it's always better to have some form of anchor to the main group, but at the same time have semi independence and embrace the oddness that makes me me.