Bedtime and dd8

[Serena1977]

Hi,

Having real difficulty getting dd8 to bed, to sleep and even to stay in her room. I desperately want to spend time relaxing with dh.

She is a night owl and has always been like this but at the moment it's getting worse. She's still up now, I can hear her moving about, then she comes downstairs for something daft like paper from the study etc. It's getting to the point where I'm begging her to stay in her room. I sould pathetic.

I don't really know how to discipline or deal with her shenanigans. I used to do the thinking spot but now she's 8 it seems ridiculous.

Please help. I think I've been too lax because I dont want her to be sad.

I'd say have a conversation with her during the day to set some clear expectations. Bedtime means in bed, eyes closed and trying to sleep. 8 isn't too old for a star chart to get something she wants, maybe offer something if she can go to bed nicely for a week.

I would also combine this with plenty of exercise during the day and a fairly slow wind down before bed (we have an hour for our bedtime routine).

I've had periods where I've sat with my dc swishing them until they dropped off, making sure they don't get up and muck about until they got back into a routine.

I have an 8 year old. We eat at 630, after we've finished she gets ready for bed. Bed by 8 if she wants a story. She reads to me, I read to her. Lights out and I put music on my phone and sit with her til she sleeps.

Have you tried letting her read until she falls asleep? I would be firm about some ground rules i.e. no toys/crafts/games after bedtime but allow a small reading light and a book or lights out and an audio book.

Then, if she gets out of bed, even once, it's lights out, book away, no distractions, lie there until you fall asleep type thing.

If you don't think it's behavioural and she genuinely can't fall asleep easily, ask the gp for suggestions.