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Is this really rude of me?

24 replies

Unorthodoxx · 10/12/2020 22:49

I've had some christmas cards made to send out to family and friends.

I had a personalised message printed on them to save me having to write them. I have just been popping them in the envelopes and addressing the envelopes.

It has just dawned on me that this might be really bad etiquette since i havent written the recipients name inside? The card just has a generic message, along the lines of:

Merry Christmas!

With love and best wishes,

The Unorthodoxx family

So half the cards are sealed and in their addressed envelopes. Do I need to buy new envelopes and start again?

I am a single parent, full time student and working 30 hours a week. To say i am snowed under would be a massive understatement and I think in my state of constant exhaustion, I just didnt think this one through!

OP posts:
Countarthursgroupie · 10/12/2020 22:51

I'd be happy to receive one like that, but I know there are more sensitive souls out there!

captainprincess · 10/12/2020 23:04

I don't think it's rude of you and I certainly wouldn't say anything to you, but I would probably think it wouldn't have taken a moment to write my name....
Just my thoughts though Grin

Unorthodoxx · 10/12/2020 23:17

Okay, im thinking i need to just bite the bullet and buy new envolopes!

OP posts:

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Fecking2020 · 10/12/2020 23:19

Send them. The gesture is enough and those who know you will know how busy everything is got you rn.

GiantKitten · 10/12/2020 23:20

Next year add this to the printed message Wink

To say i am snowed under would be a massive understatement and I think in my state of constant exhaustion, I just didnt think this one through!

(But assuming they know your current circs I’d hope they would all understand anyway Smile)

DramaAlpaca · 10/12/2020 23:20

You really should write people's names on them. If you're going to the effort of sending a card at all, it doesn't take much extra time to do that.

Unorthodoxx · 10/12/2020 23:22

I completely agree @DramaAlpaca. I have no idea why i didnt write the names inside. It's unlike me to be so thoughtless.

OP posts:
AIMD · 10/12/2020 23:22

I honestly wouldn’t care if I received a card without my name on.

Given you’re so busy I’d just carry on as you are.

HallFloor · 10/12/2020 23:24

I don't think it's any worse than just scrawling their name in TBH, but I do wonder why you'd bother at all if you don't have the time or inclination to actually say anything.

I'm not offended by such cards, I just don't see the point. I only send cards to elderly relatives who I'm not in touch with on SM these days and would write a short personal message.

emilyfrost · 10/12/2020 23:24

Yes, I think it’s really rude and generic. It doesn’t show any thought as you haven’t even bothered to write in the recipients name.

It’s like you’ve just done a box ticking exercise and may well have not bothered.

Remaker · 10/12/2020 23:26

I think writing their name and signing your name would be more personal than just the preprinted message.

I got a card yesterday from one of my closest friends. But she didn’t write it. I assume she outsourced to one of her kids, including signing her name. It’s not a family card it’s to me from her but she hasn’t written any of it. I don’t really see the point of it to be honest.

ClaireP20 · 10/12/2020 23:29

Send them, i wouldn't bat an eyelid if I received a card printed out, honestly it's fine OP x

OrigamiOwl · 10/12/2020 23:32

I would assume that you'd only sent me a card as a box ticking exercise, as it would feel rather impersonal.

HallFloor · 10/12/2020 23:34

@Remaker

I think writing their name and signing your name would be more personal than just the preprinted message.

I got a card yesterday from one of my closest friends. But she didn’t write it. I assume she outsourced to one of her kids, including signing her name. It’s not a family card it’s to me from her but she hasn’t written any of it. I don’t really see the point of it to be honest.

Doesn't that worry you? I'd be concerned about what was wrong with my friend
Lucindainthesky · 10/12/2020 23:36

I wouldn't think it rude, but I would wonder why you bothered. It sounds a bit like a corporate xmas card

Bairnsmum05 · 10/12/2020 23:36

I couldn't care less tbh, in my opinion you are over thinking it. However obviously not everyone agrees. 😁

EBearhug · 10/12/2020 23:38

I'm not going to judge anyone on lack of cards, lack of personalisation or anything this year. If they're thinking of me, that's good enough, and some people won't have time for that. We're all worn out by this year.

lottiegarbanzo · 10/12/2020 23:41

It is an odd thing to do, as if it's a generic card from a business.

I have always followed the rule that the name of the recipient and sender must always be handwritten, even on a printed letter or card.

Barmyfarmy · 10/12/2020 23:52

OP send the ones you've already sealed and write names on the rest. People who know and love you will A) be grateful and think it's better than no card and B) will know your situation and would think how thoughtful it is of you to still send cards knowing how busy you are. If any kick up a stink tell them to write their own bloody cards!

Fungster · 10/12/2020 23:54

I'd be touched that you'd gone to the effort of sending me one, as I haven't sent any in years.

borntohula · 10/12/2020 23:57

Can't believe people actually would be upset by this. Get a goddamn grip. 😂

Remaker · 11/12/2020 04:31

@HallFloor she’s very busy but is the type of person who won’t let go of her self-imposed standards. One must send the Christmas cards!

Bloodybridget · 11/12/2020 05:55

I would be surprised to get a card like that from a friend or family member - but not half as flabbergasted as by the one we received from DP's brother yesterday, addressed to [DP first name] and [my first name] [DP's ex husband's surname] - we are a same sex couple, have our own surnames, and DP stopped using her ex's surname when they divorced nearly 40 years ago!

AwkwardSquad · 11/12/2020 05:58

@EBearhug

I'm not going to judge anyone on lack of cards, lack of personalisation or anything this year. If they're thinking of me, that's good enough, and some people won't have time for that. We're all worn out by this year.
I’m with EBearhug on this one. I’d be happy you’re thinking of me and mentally congratulate you for being this organised, given the year we’re all having.
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