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Christmas romance..? Or not. Either way, I need your help!

12 replies

DontWantALot · 09/12/2020 07:23

Ok people of mumsnet, I need some help!

I am in a bubble with a male friend of mine. We are both single. I've known him for just over a year. We dated for a few months but lockdown hit, my work got crazy, his went down the pan and we split up. All very amicable and we are now 'just good friends'.

The last couple of times we've seen each other, its felt 'different'. We spent all day/evening together at the weekend and it was definitely different - he was a bit flirty with me, told me i was cute, we were physically close on occasion and, at the end of the evening, when we did our usual hug and kiss on the cheek goodbye, he kissed me on the lips instead. Nothing passionate, just a peck really but still. Nothing concrete but it would have been inappropriate had either of us been seeing someone else, I think. We went somewhere and did something that was definitely 'datey' although I hadn't realised how much it would feel like a date (possibly to both of us) until we got there.

I don't really know what to make of it.

We have already made plans for me to go over before christmas for the evening. I'm going to make mulled wine and take food and will stop overnight (in the spare room...) due to drinking.

I would be open to trying again if he wanted to but I'm equally happy with the friendship. I can be romantic but mainly I'm very pragmatic!

My question is really that I want to make a bit of effort with the food. I will have some time during the day to prep and am going round early evening.

I want to make food that is nice and shows I've made an effort. I'm not really intending on making it hugely romantic in case I've misread the signs. I want to prepare stuff that won't need cooking when I'm there. I know he would really appreciate an effort made with the food either way. And i would to.

I dont want to be obvious but I want to create an atmosphere where, if something is going to happen, it could.

Any suggestions..?

OP posts:
DontWantALot · 09/12/2020 08:01

Anyone..?

OP posts:
MrsElijahMikaelson1 · 09/12/2020 08:13

What sort of food does he like?

MorrisZapp · 09/12/2020 08:18

Well I always find that the ideal food for signalling that although I'm in the spare room I'm up for a christmas shag is home made teabread.

One bite and he'll be in your arms.

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Candleabra · 09/12/2020 08:26

Why did you split up? Surely if you've been there already with dating then it's a no go. Are you sure you're not settling because he's in your bubble and the only man around at the moment?

MorrisZapp · 09/12/2020 08:33

Yes we need to know why you split. Busy at work isn't a reason.

gower4 · 09/12/2020 10:04

Sorry OP, but without more details it sounds to me like he wants to keep his options open and, at most, have no-strings sex. If that's what you want, that's obviously fine, but don't set yourself up to be hurt.

DontWantALot · 09/12/2020 12:34

Thanks. The boundaries of any 'engagement' arent really the topic of the thread. I'm comfortable with that aspect. It was the food that I was wondering about!

Tea bread sounds good...

He eats pretty much anything!

OP posts:
DontWantALot · 09/12/2020 12:36

Again, reasons for the split arent relevant. I want food that signals I've made an effort but not too much so 🤣

OP posts:
TheSpottedZebra · 09/12/2020 13:34

But most of the OP was about him, and only a tiny bit about the food.
I don't buy that this is about the food!

gannett · 09/12/2020 13:45

A pie and/or cake? Comfort food that you can make as special as you want with flavour/filling/decoration and is also easily transportable.

Or something you already know he likes, maybe something you've had together or made for him before? If that's not too obvious.

Be aware that a food coma can be the enemy of romance!

Rainbowshine · 09/12/2020 13:48

Nothing too smelly/garlicky etc! In case that wasn’t obvious...

I’d do something that isn’t too fiddly, maybe a quiche or something along those lines.

Yogapoga123 · 09/12/2020 14:24

Coq au vin...? ie cock with wine Grin

Serious suggestion, as you can pre-cook it, so no stress. Plus it’s a ‘smart’ dinner party type meal without being too obvious or flash.

Goes well with green beans, and maybe some type of potato.

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