I didn't realise my mental health was so poor. Anyone else?

[LivingMyBestLife2020]

I will just say to start with that I am totally fine and don't need a doctor, just to sort myself out now I am aware. I also wanted to check in with others who may be like me without realising.

This year has obviously been so tough on everyone. In February I moved out of the family home and set up fresh with my son. I was still working full time then (always have) until i lost my job in March. Since then I have worked part time and gone back to study. I spend a lot of time indoors now and when I worked full time I was always well dressed, groomed etc and enjoyed the daily ritual of getting ready and feeling fresh. I am also a stickler for a clean and tidy house. I exercised a lot before the weather changed and haven't been in the last month.

Anyway, this week my patience has been through the floor. I have lost my temper with my toddler more times than I care to admit (just shouting, id never lay a finger on him) which is unlike me. I felt really rubbish this morning so have taken the day off (I only work 3 hours on a Friday but I decided I was more important)

Anyway, I took stock of myself and my house. I realised I haven't washed or brushed my hair in a week. Haven't showered for 2 days. My skin looks awful, I cant remember if I brushed my teeth yesterday. My laundry basket is over flowing, the bins need emptying upstairs and down, my kitchen is in need of a good clean etc and the general consensus was that I had lost any care for myself or home.

I realise now that my mental health must be poor as I wouldn't normally get like this. So i've had a long bath, scrubbed my hair, given myself a facial, hair mask, plucked my eyebrow, put on clean clothes and perfume. Now I am about to tackle the house and take stock of my poor eating habits that have snuck in this week to.

Anybody else like this?

I've got a lot of good stuff going on but I am suffering a bit with anxiety but its definitely due to the amount of coffee and chocolate I am having (its like mini adrenaline rushes for me).

So i've caught it now and will work on it. Is everybody else ok? Please all take a quick minute to take stock and check you are ok x

What a thoughtful post, OP. I agree with you that, in the current circumstances, it's very easy to let things slide. That's completely fine if you genuinely aren't bothered about those things, but you're right that, for many, it can be a big signal about something deeper going on, and taking care of the small things can actually help us get a handle on, and be more prepared for the deeper things.

I sometimes find myself putting off going to bed just because the thought of getting ready for bed is too much. Those are usually the times I really need to go to bed.

It's the repetitiveness and what's-the-pointness of some aspects of life at the moment that can be a bit grinding. It sounds like you've had a lot on your plate this year (I know we all have one way or another) but it's good that you're looking out for yourself now. And remember, if a bit of self-care doesn't help, it might be time for a chat with your GP.

I think it's really great that you have recognised where you are and been able to do something about it. You should be very proud of yourself.

I am having a rotten week and notice the home conditions start to slip, I am more snappy and impatient with the DC.

Like you I have a lot going on (divorce, house move to name just a couple) I am starting to notice I am getting 'stuck' a lot more. Unable to make decisions, wading through treacle, whilst simultaneously overthinking quite a lot.

Today I have booked some counselling sessions and am currently writing an achievable list for today, and a list of 'nice' things to do tomorrow and the week ahead.

Well done, OP, for “catching” yourself. It’s fucking hard to sometimes just stop, take a look at yourself and around you, and just deal with it. I hope you’re feeling a little better.

I moved home in March (one week before lockdown) to live by myself and my two cats. The official end to my 14yr marriage (18yrs together). The split has been super amicable but it’s been an adjustment.

I was then ill with reactive arthritis (thanks COVID!), have carried on WFH full time with a very supportive manager, but my mental health has taken a battering. All the things that I used to love doing have gone out the window. I can’t be bothered to exercise, can’t even focus enough to read, put on about a stone, and am constantly tired. But it’s ok. This too shall pass.

I have also gained over a stone over this year. Its been absolutely insane this year. I am feeling better just for catching myself. I felt terrible this morning for being so stroppy with my son. I dropped him at nursery and he said "love you mama" and I just felt awful. The washer is on, the dishwasher is on, the bins are out and the robot vac is doing his thing. Just this makes me feel a little better, as well as being clean.

Yesss... I'm on a bit of a downer at the moment.

Like you, the little things start to stack up and I get out of my routine of cleaning and looking after myself. Actually, you've helped kickstart me a little. I've just put a load of washing on and I'm going to blitz the kitchen then have a nice bath.

Oh, forgot to say. The key indicator for me is that I don't want to talk to my friends at all at the moment. Properly avoiding contact because I have nothing to say and think I'm going to bore or annoy them. Rationally, I know they would want to support me, but the gremlins tell me otherwise.

My housework takes a back seat when I’m not mentally healthy so I understand that. I find it a vicious cycle of looking round going it’s such a state in here but not doing anything to change it. Luckily it tends to only last a couple of weeks before I pick myself up and put things right.

I understand this. I have to be on top of the house otherwise I'm so anxious. But weve moved and there is stuff everywhere. My stress is beginning to manifest itself physically as well. It's really hard for alot of people