Do other people have quiet times in their head or is their brain always talking?

[Smallsteps88]

Do you ever have silence in your head? I never do. My head voice is constantly talking. Shite mostly. It often interrupts conversations I’m having with people and I have to concentrate really hard to “hear”what the other person is saying. I really wish I could switch it off sometimes. I take hours to fall asleep every night because my brain is still going. Is that what everyone else has or do you have quiet sometimes?

I’m so glad I found this thread. Yes, my mind is constantly going !
Even if I wake in the night for a wee, and am staggering to the loo, a song will pop into my mind but it won’t go until I’ve finished the song in my head !
I’m constantly having conversations and arguments with people, even though those conversations will never take place !
It’s exhausting.

Yep, anyone suffered from Pure ocd?

And yes, like TammyTwoSawnson my thoughts are more conceptual than verbal, until I try to share them with someone.

Mine too. I am also a maladaptive daydreamer. A friend was describing her loneliness and was talking about hating the silence. It was so strange. I am always in my head, with my decades long story arcs and characters!

Nope, no quiet time, but I do have ADHD.

Even when I’m trying to get to sleep my brain is chatting shit.

I have a constant inner monologue, including lots of the stuff mentioned so far - imagined conversations with other people, things I'm worried about, inner critic etc. I can switch it off if I remember to though.

Meditation helps. I don't do it a lot now, but I learned to when I was suffering from post-natal anxiety, and the technique still helps to stop the mental chatter, even when I'm not actually meditating.

Fascinated to hear about 'tickertape synaesthesia' from someone upthread. I get a bit of that in dreams sometimes, and sometimes 'see' written/typed words in my mind's eye when I'm talking or thinking. I didn't know it was a recognised thing, and a form of synaesthesia!

I have quiet time when walking, and at night. My interior monologue usually plans my day or week and the things that need doing. I can sit with memories rather than dwelling on them.

It helps that I have a peaceful life - when things have been difficult the monologue is faster and more panicky. A previous partner said that I “live in the now” more than anyone he’d ever met.

I really dislike formal mindfulness practices but yoga or tai chi is great for stilling the mind.

It’s like having multiple tabs open in your brain that you can never close, whilst simultaneously having a conversation and doing a complex task. It’s so exhausting always being on the cusp of overwhelm. I suspect I have ASD and or ADHD.

Another one with a brain just like yours. I too thought everybody's brain was like this and I was just somehow incompetent in my inability to shut out the 'noise'...until I was diagnosed with ADHD last year...

For the first time ever that I can remember in my 47 years of life, my brain was quiet the very first day I took my ADHD medication...

It was very eerie, almost echoey, and rather strange, and I really wasn't sure I liked it at first, but as I've got used to it it makes focusing on one thought/conversation at a time to its conclusion possible, which really helps to make life less frustrating .

I'm now more used to my medication and the inner monologue is still there, but it runs a little quieter, and less insistently these days! I am able to 'switch it off' and focus on the task at hand, which is great. My house is tidy, I am calmer and can maintain my focus and attention even on boring, mundane tasks whilst medicated, and I am still me !

ADHD is very heritable (believed to be up to 70%+), so if one or more of your children are diagnosed it is likely you or their father also has ADHD. DD2 and DS were both diagnosed before I was, then DD1, and having learnt more about it I'm pretty sure my DDad also has ADHD!

@Smallsteps88

Mine is constant, OP. I try to quiet it through the regular practice of meditation, but it rarely shuts off for more than a few seconds even when I'm really concentrating as hard as I can. I just try to note the voice and then go back to the meditation, but it's bloody annoying!

I do yoga and really hate that I can’t get any calming/spiritual benefit from it. My mind just won’t let me. I persevere with the classes for the physical aspect but I would truly love to be able to fully immerse myself in the classes.

This reminded me of the time I went on a mindfulness course once. The course involved a short meditation/mindfulness session.

We all sat in a room and were told to 'clear your minds and just focus on your breathing'...afterwards the instructor asked us how it had felt, and what we had noticed while focusing on our breathing.
All the others present said they felt calm and peaceful, their breathing and heart rate had slowed and it made them feel more able to deal with things by having a break from everything inside their heads.

I felt even more stressed, anxious and clammy! My breathing and heart rate had increased as the total silence in the room from the other participants had just amplified everything else I could always hear but try to block out...the buzzing overhead light, the ticking heater, the receptionist on the phone down the corridor, people arriving and leaving the building, traffic passing, and worst of all an entire room filled with the sound of people breathing! It was not a relaxing or calming experience for me at all...

I was diagnosed with ADD last week, and one of the things the psychologist asked about was whether my brain felt "noisy" and whether I spend a lot of time daydreaming.

My brain only thinks about things I want it to. I don't 'hear' voices but rather sense them. I do day dream.
If I was going down stairs to get a drink (for example) I might say to myself on the way down the stairs that I may as well empty the dish washer while in down there... but I suspect this isn't what you mean?

Same, @MissDoLots. I didn't realise for ages that when people talked about their inner voice, they meant literal dialogue. I can practise conversations in my head, but it's a conscious effort, and I have to concentrate quite a lot to do so.

I also don't hear the character's voice when I read, which a friend found weird. She has different voices for each character, which was equally alien to me.

I do get earworms, but I never remember my dreams unless they're nightmares. I do daydream sometimes, but can switch it on/off.

I'm going to watch Peep Show in a whole different light now. I thought it was just a farce, but turns out it was actually gritty realism!

I have a constant inner monalogue and day dream and get ear worms that I can’t help singing and usually only one line of each somg so it drives everyone mad

And however badly ive driven someone mad it can be worse for me when i am trying to sleep as my brain is singing to me

This is literally me. Quite often dh and dcs will be having a conversation and I’ll be having one in my head with myself and I’ll come out with something not at all related to their conversation. Cue the confused looks at a random sentence 😄😳

Even now I’ve got a song running in my head.it’s oddly comforting especially during the day when I’m on my own.

My children take the piss out of me for subject jumping...what they obviously don’t realise is that i have finished with the subject

And quite often so have they....in my head

Always noisy but not overly intrusive. I sleep well and like the way I can process something else whilst doing something else. I do sometimes talk out loud or struggle to separate an imagined conversation from a real one. Driving can get overwhelming as I oddly focus on one thing more as I think but that can be quite emotional depending on what I am thinking about. Singing helps keep me more present so I listen to really loud music and sing along like a wannabe. Running and walking calms me - I need the physical movement and sitting still horrified me. As I type this I have all of my toes separated out and twitching, I am planning lunch and thinking about calling my brother whilst humming a song. My husband is a very still sort. Fascinates me. One of my kids prob has ADHD and if it came from anyone then DH is sure that is me.

If my brain isn’t talking, it’s bloody singing. Can’t imagine quiet! Must be restful!

Another one like you OP. I honestly sometimes crave my brain to shut up. it never bloody does

DP and I were amazed at each other when he told me about his brain shutting up and I told him that mine never does. It was an odd moment for both of us wondering what it was like to be in each others brain.

Ds1 is definitely like me as well ,we have talked about how to manage it.

I sometimes like it ,in that it allows quick information process but what i wouldn't give for a little bit of peace sometimes.

*I need podcasts and audiobooks in order to get things done, but can concentrate in a last-minute panic for a deadline.

I fall asleep within minutes with earbuds, sleep for five hours with relentless dreams so vivid that. I need time when I waken to suss out what is real and what isn't. I dream during the day if I try to relax*
Wow, this is me!
My children complain constantly about me listening to audiobooks ALL THE TIME, if I didn't I would just walk around the house all day wondering what I'm supposed to be doing.

*It never shuts up. I'm a maladaptive day dreamer too

I wind myself up and get upset over imagined scenarios in my head*

Glad that's not just me! I can upset myself with imagined conversations and scenarios

I do some meditation when I remember and that's good for break, although really difficult at first - you have to persist.

I have found wfh detrimental to my maladaptive daydreaming and constant thoughts.

You have to keep it in check during the day to a great extent when you're among others in an office environment and out commuting, etc it is a distraction from it.

Now I walk around the house voicing it all out loud and even saying words aloud that aren't even words and sort of talking to myself constantly.

When I'm out the house now I occasionally talk aloud and forget that I'm not at home.

It has run riot since wfh and I find it quite intrusive and I find myself shouting STOP IT at myself

Thank you everyone for all your it comments. It’s really good to know I’m far from alone in this and you’ve given some great advice to try and cope with it.

I have to read to sleep or have the radio on. I have to listen to the radio all the time if I'm going to get anything done.

Same. I’ve had the radio on to sleep with since I was about 8 years old. Unfortunately as an adult I progressed to TV, it has to be something I’m very familiar with. so now I can’t fall asleep without friends or the Big Bang theory on my tv. I don’t watch it, just listen. I’d love to break the habit. I’ve tried. A few times to no avail. I have to have music on to do any form of work of activity. The music is like a magic button that switches me onto active mode.

I spoke with DS who has ADHD and he has the same in his head although he says he can quieten his voice if he concentrates. (He is medicated) I have the opposite- if I try and concentrate my brain will almost go into panic mode and ramp up the volume and speed and start talking about worst case scenarios if I don’t get this thing done.

@Blibbyblobby

Oh god and I’ve just remembered my imaginary medieval girl! When I was a kid there was a story in Bunty or something about a medieval girl who turned up in the twentieth century and a modern girl who had to explain everything to her and keep her out of trouble. For some reason that stuck in my mind and some part of my brain has spent the last 40 years on and off thinking how I’d explain whatever I’m currently doing to an imaginary medieval girl.

Haha, I love this!

Constantly - and it is exhausting. I do suffer from anxiety, and when it hits me badly the inner monologues are just painful. As many pp have said it's the constant imaginary conversations - I''l say this, then she will say that. These never end up playing out that way in real life, but they can be very distressing.

Even when I am ok and not feeling anxious my mind does not let up. I can drift out of the book I'm reading or the TV I am watching without knowing it, and then somehow realise 10 pages on that I have no clue what I have just read because my noisy mind has taken over.

I am learning to use mindfulness to go with the flow now. So, I do a lot of walking. My chatty mind is there with the commentary, but in a controlled way, reminding me how good the pine smells, or how lovely the sound of the waves are crashing on a beach. It's a bit like taking a video or photo with my mind. I am also finding doing craft helps - sewing especially, the inner dialogue guiding me along with a commentary on what I am doing. I am a very neat, methodical person when it comes to complex tasks - I think the inner monologue thing helps with this.

I would love some time out from it. I tried yoga but that did not work. I am now trying to channel the noise in my head - control it rather than let it control me. Sometimes it works, sometimes not.

So much is falling into place after reading all your comments. I’ve been exhausted since the dawn of time and could never understand why. Maybe this is why. My brain doesn’t sleep.