How common is it for teenagers to contribute financially

[FancyNancyClancy2]

I recently posted a thread about under 18s and jobs and there were a lot of answers regarding teenagers having to work to support the household.

I’m just genuinely interested how common this is. I’m probably extremely naive but although I know this happens it’s not something I’ve ever come across in real life.

[quote FancyNancyClancy2]@RayOfSunshine2013 yes I agree, I got a job at 16 and the money that I earned (although not loads) was my money for saving, socialising, and all those little extras. In my experience everyone who had a job at school, this was what they used the money for as well, i just never heard anyone who had to use that money to keep the electric on for example.[/quote]
You may just not have heard about it.

My friends thought I was a real bore as a a teen because I saved so hard. They had no way of knowing that the "savings" were mostly what I gave my GPs. It was hard enough for GPs to have to accept the money without anyone else knowing about it.

Education is usually also important to people whose family circumstances are different from your @PlanDeRaccordement

Maybe not everyone is fortunate enough to have the privilege of choice ?

@BackforGood

Education is usually also important to people whose family circumstances are different from your *@PlanDeRaccordement*

Maybe not everyone is fortunate enough to have the privilege of choice ?

You know nothing about my family or our circumstances. Education is a choice here in Western Europe.

@PlanDeRaccordement

Never expected any DC of mine in full time education to work and give me money. Even in their twenties. Once they have their doctorates and first real job, then they’d be living independently. But up to that point, I feel it’s mine and DHs responsibility as parents to support them. Yes, if your DC leaves education at a younger age and starts full time work, then I suppose that comes earlier. But education is very important in our family so it’s not going to happen to any one as a teenager.

I supported my DD1 and DD2 through college as a single parent. Then I had to take early retirement to be full time carer for my mother and after she passed away for my aunt. By the time she passed I was having health issues. My DS is in his last year of secondary school and plans to go to college. He got a part-time job and takes any extra hours he can get (25-39 hrs/week). He is also full-time carer for me. He pays for his cell phone and half of the car insurance. He is saving the rest for college. I wish I could pay everything for him like I did the two girls, retirement pay isn't as much as earned salary and medical costs are much increased now.

@GeorgiaGirl52
Inspiring that you are succeeding so well against such tough times. You are still supporting your DCs through education despite very challenging circumstances. You haven’t forced your DS to forgo his education in order to work and support you.

It often happens when families are on benefits and lose £££ when the child leaves school
Is that true? I can’t believe it! Why is it a child’s responsibility to replace government money?

Of course it's true, not all families are well off or even anywhere beyond poverty level. Are you always that naive?

When I started working as a young teen all parental help ceased. I had to buy my own clothes, toiletries, train/bus fares, days out, shoes, driving lessons ...I actually had very little value my friends still got clothes, shoes etc paid for and their money was just for fun.

When I started full time work I gave £150 as digs (I earned £700 as I’m old lol) and my mum said ‘I used to give my mother my full wage packet every week you know and she’d just give me pocket money!’ I said ‘that’s fine I’ll give you my full wage every month but you’ll have to go to the train station and update my season ticket, set up all my direct debits for my phone etc’ she suddenly didn’t think it was as good an idea when she realised she had to put some effort in.

Namex- That’s terrible, but not surprising, really. Under the Blair/ Brown govt

Still, she will have to claim JSA now and will be forced to look for work

Is that true? I can’t believe it! Why is it a child’s responsibility to replace government money

It's not, but the reality is that the amount of benefits that a family may lose when no longer entitled due to dependent children is very significant and many low income families simply cannot afford to support their young adult children for basic needs and/or the sort of extras they might want, like trainers, phones and make up, to use the examples upthread.

You're in a pretty privileged position for this to be not on your radar at all.

A couple of generations ago it was common for DC to leave school for work as early as 15 because the family needed the money to put food on the table and keep the lights on. Both my parents did this and they were born in the 1940s and 50s.

@Namex

That's terrible. I'm so sorry.

I paid keep from 16 and for all my clothes, haircuts, toiletries etc. My SIL is 21 and works full time and doesn’t pay any sort of keep and her parents go halves on her getting her hair done and any of her care expenses. Different people do different things!

When I was a teen and waitressing part time I wasn’t expected to pay towards anything, my wages were mine but when I started worked full time and was still living at home I was asked for a small rent which was fair

I had to contribute to the household as soon as I was 16 and had a part time job (still in education). I also had to buy my own clothes, shoes, san pro, toiletries etc. I was the eldest of six (blended family). Shockingly enough they never asked any of the others to do the same. The summer benefits I went to uni I had to pay £500 a month and buy all my own food too. I remember watching them all sit down to a family meal and I didn’t have anything to eat as I’d run out of food. I wasn’t allowed any of theirs.

*before I went to uni

I had to pay 1/3 of any holiday job I got all the way through until I finished uni. I had to prove that I was saving a1/3 and I had to show monthly down to the last penny what I was spending the rest of the time. I also had to pay 1/2 the phone bill (even though I rarely used the phone because my elder sibling was on it) and half the petrol for the second car, even though I rarely got to drive it because elder sibling got first refusal.

Parents didn't need it and sibling didn't have to pay anything apart from the other half of phone and car because she had a more worthwhile holiday job than I did.

When DS turned 16 and left school I lost whst was then rent help, council tax help and what is now family tax credit.
I was working as a Nursery Nurse in a Nursery at the time. At minimum wage.
I also worked in a pub 4 evenings a week.

DS had to help out with the rent and council tax, either that or I would have had yo downsized to a 1 bed from a 2 and he would have had o found somewhere else to live

Not everybody works in a job that makes enough money to support two adults.

That wasn't the end of it with my mum.

At university with my grant and loan (my grant didn't even cover my hall fees) she would moan about money to me and how little she had.

I sent her money home a few times put of my student loan as she kept guilt tripping me.

I was away 10 week blocks at a time when she wasn't feeding me or buying me anything and my sister was living at home at uni and working and giving her fuck all

I was the soft touch. She preyed on me.

It often happens when families are on benefits and lose £££ when the child leaves school

Especially as they tend to leave school earlier and not go to uni or at least not straight away as happened with my dd and I. She left school at 16 for a variety of reasons and was working full time and getting a pretty good salary!

I am disabled and on benefits and lost child benefit, child tax credits, and all associated help but dd still needed housed and fed etc so of course she needed to pay keep and she understood that.

25% of her salary didn't actually even totally cover all her costs but we agreed it was only fair as she was working and earning. She certainly wasn’t supporting me though.

What do you suggest families in my position do op? Same question to others thinking this is unfair? They're to all intents and purposes adults at this point

I left school at 16 too and paid keep until I left home at 17 (not because of this) and then of course I had to pay rent etc just like all other adults.

I do wonder what planet some more fortunate people are living on to try and tell families like mine that we're being unfair to our kids!

Not everyone can AFFORD to support a full time working person for whom they're receiving no other income to feed, house them etc - Exactly where do you expect us to magic the money up from?

Genuinely interested!

I've been on a tight budget all dds life, I am not a profligate spender I am very good at budgeting and bargain hunting, my money was never wasted.

The "government money" was to support the child. Once the child is working, that's what their job's for

Exactly!

Dd worked part time from 14 and no that money was hers to keep and do with as she wishes but that's a totally different situation as I was still receiving money to support her essentials at that point.

Hopefully it's not so common these days

Wow! Mn really is another world at times!

20 million Uk families approx are in receipt of income related dwp benefits (meaning we're talking uc, income support etc not just child benefit which most families get) and that's 2019 figures before covid hit! Those figs aren't available yet. But there's likely to be an estimated (a very conservative estimate in my opinion) a 4-6% increase this year alone, that's approx another 1mn families struggling.

50-60% of Uk school leavers are under 18 still.

These threads are contentious mainly as there are mners who CAN afford to continue supporting their full time working children who can’t seem to grasp that is simply not the case for the majority of working class, low income families

Money really is the root of all evil. as an aside it’s the LOVE of money which is the root of all evil.

Seen in this example I would say by the huge wage disparity we have in this country between ceo level salaries and lowest paid employee salaries

But education is very important in our family what makes you think poorer families don’t value education? They’re simply often not in a position that their dc can afford or are able to access uni let alone post graduate study! Your family is FORTUNATE that they have both the financial AND academic ability to do so - check your privilege!

and I voluntarily paid half towards my car and horses. possibly the most tone deaf comment this far!

Education is a choice here in Western Europe

not for everyone!

Even with supposedly compulsory education until 16 not every family or child is able to access, for a number of reasons.

@barbaraofseville - yes, my parents both left school without any qualifications at 14, economy was great then (60’s) and they literally walked into jobs after school with barely even having interviews! I left with 3 GCSEs at 16 and was lucky the economy was doing well and was able to get a job straight away albeit a low paid one. I went to college via evening classes to get more GCSEs and a-levels. Dd left at 16 with a fair few qualifications inc 2 highers (roughly Scots equivalent of a-levels) as she is very academically able. There were other reasons why she left school “early”, it was much less common for her generation than it was for mine but she was far from a rarity! This is a deprived area most of the children here won’t go to uni.

I am sorry for those posters who’s parents took advantage of them though, that is unacceptable too.

It’s a fine balance.

But to be honest even if I could afford to support dd I really don’t think a full time working person should expect another to support them.

The mn “middle ground” of the working child paying the parent a sum and the parent puts that aside to give back to them when they move out is ridiculous too! Surely the working child should be simply paying their keep (it’s not free to live!) and if they wish to save for 1st home or whatever they can sort that themselves?

To my mind a person that’s left school and is working full time is to all intents and purposes an adult and should behave as such.

It’s really common.

Most of the kids I grew up with paid their way from an early age. We all had part time jobs from around 13 onwards. Things like helping market stall holders, tally men, cleaning offices etc and we’d all go strawberry picking in the holidays to earn extra. That would pay for anything we needed, after new school shoes, uniforms etc, and help out a bit with the bills. I was able to do A Levels and a year learning typing etc at college but I couldn’t take the exams because they cost money I just didn’t have (college was a bus and train journey that had to be paid for) and uni just wasn’t an option. So when I got a job, I wasn’t entitled to housing benefit or council tax benefit, so I had to pay that directly to the council, with my keep on top of that to my mum until I moved out. Obviously, it would have been amazing to do a degree, but it wasn’t the end of the world. I’m doing the same job as my colleagues, who all have degrees, and I can make a pound stretch a bloody long way.

I voluntarily paid half towards my car and horses I know you meant it seriously and I’m not mocking you but this really made me laugh!

Education is a choice here in Western Europe All those qualifications and yet utterly clueless.

@Graphista i think I made my initial post very unclear which I apologise before because my question was only about part time work and in full time education. It was also never about looking down at anyone who’s financial position meant that this needed to happen. It was just a scenario that came up a lot on my previous thread and because I had not heard of this before I was just interested in knowing how common a situation this is.

I 100% agree with you regarding adults in the house working full time contributing. Both myself and my siblings did so when we lived at home and that’s certainly something that I will be doing with my own children. Learning about money and budgeting and things is so essential in life it was always shocks me that this is so overlooked in schools.

I paid for once I turned 16 - bus fare to sixth form, clothes , had to do my own washing etc my Mum then asked for money towards bills - they both worked not short of money. I moved out when I was 18, I really wanted to go to university but my parents did not want to support me and asked me where would I stay out of term time. I had two jobs and full time sixth form was hard and I didn’t do as well at exam time as I just couldn’t afford to give up work as I’d have no bus fare money to get to school.
My 17 year old now works and goes to sixth form. We’ve asked her to save some of her money (and has done) we expect her to pay for her own nights out etc and we buy the basics for uniform etc. Lockdown has meant she has a fairly healthy bank balance even with paying for her own driving lessons etc I couldn’t imagine asking her at this age to pay anything more - she is very good at saving but that has to be her choice so she can learn - I don’t see the point of giving it to me to save for her. She set up her saving account herself with the bank on top of her ISA.

Op I didn't particularly feel you were looking down on people who needed this to happen, it was more certain other pps.

But I also think it's not something that should happen JUST because there's a "'need"

I've met a lot of young adults in various ways who came from better off even wealthy families who had/have very entitled attitudes generally and/or struggled with the transition to adulthood - not just with budgeting - because their parents didn't expect them to take any responsibility for anything! But then as soon as they hit 18/21/graduating those same parents expected them to just somehow magically "know" how to create and run a budget, a home etc

I genuinely believe you're not doing your kids any favours if you don't teach them:

The VALUE of money - not just what it buys but how many hours work that item "costs"

How to create and run a budget - interesting you mention schools, Martin Lewis has been campaigning for some time for financial management to be made part of the maths curriculum and I agree with him. But certainly parents where possible need to do their part. Mine taught me how to create and use a cash book, How interest rates worked, how to create a budget, haggling and shopping around etc and I've taught dd the same. She often face palms at peers when they fall for poor "special offers" etc

Basics of household management - not just chores but diy basics, decorating etc

Food basics - not just cooking but meal planning and feeding a family on a budget

Basic "survival" skills and prepping and planning for emergencies - if this year has shown us anything it's that this is a necessity! But even really basic stuff like having candles and matches stored in case of a power cut, first aid, who to contact in an emergency and what information they'll need...

Where possible -

Also car and bike maintenance and good practice (how you drive and maintaining your car saves you money)

I think people are also forgetting how good it feels to buy something with money you've earned yourself, especially larger and more meaningful purchases. There's a personal pride to that.

I think it is extremely rare in this day and age. When I was growing up it was not uncommon in poor families.

I voluntarily paid half towards my car and horses I know you meant it seriously and I’m not mocking you but this really made me laugh!
I know, right?!