How do I get a council house?

[Breastfeedingworries]

Evening ladies, I’m in a huge pickle.
Apologies that’s it’s quite a long post. Trying to keep it brief as I can without the inevitable drip feed. 💧

(I understand this thread may twist and turn in a lot of directions but I’m tired and I’ll just gloss over the negatives and ignore so save your fingers vipers)

Me and my mum have a very up and down relationship. She does belittle my parenting and put me down a lot, but is also super helpful and supportive. The main issues are her not wanting me to grow up, or worrying I won’t manage. I’m 32!

I moved back home after a break up, I’d lived away for a year. (I never left for uni or anything) so I’m not experienced with bills or money management really.

I’ve got single mum friends who rent and struggle ect and I really want to get a housing Association or council house. (I know impossible right!)

I just want to turn my life around, main reason for wanting one is I’d love to be able to own one day.

My mum drinks a lot, every day, so that can lead to a lot of arguments and stress and I feel so unhappy a lot of the time. I love her, and my dad but I am feeling really depressed at the moment.
My mum and dad are also vulnerable and I feel so trapped here.
I’m lonely, I want to see my friends, I’ve had a lot of struggles in lockdown and I need freedom.

I don’t know how to ask the council, my mums said she’ll write to them kicking me out but I then worry I’d be on social services radar and there’s nothing wrong.

If I choose private renting iMll never be able to buy. I’ve got a deposit that I’ve got in inheritance.

One day I just want to be in my own two feet. Most days when not sorting my daughter I hide away in my room. Nothing is mine, I can’t have a Christmas tree. I’m just unhappy and don’t know where to begin.

Thanks for reading ladies.

I just wanted to say I hope my post yesterday didn't come across as too harsh. Although I stand by what I said I do feel for you in that you seem to have very little emotional support and that it itself can be hard. If I was in your shoes i think I would look for employment again as a first step, then try I get a private one bedroom/bedsit with your child. I am not sure I would go down the road of being homeless as such as I think you will end up in a horrible hostel with your child with god knows who and you may not even have your own bathroom. It would be horrible for you x

No it’s fine I respect your opinion and I agree with you, I’m quite hopeless and feel stupid a lot of the time. I’ve always worked until I was made redundant but because of being at home with my parents and their vulnerablties I wasn’t sure what work I could do. Also I have no childcare currently my parents can’t manage my dd 23 months as both old, can’t lift her. Nurseries are having lot of cases I live in Midlands so there’s many cases.

I’ve applied as homeless with a date to leave in January. They told me hotels they use and luckily both are in decent areas that I know. So that’s good at least. I haven’t had a call yet today but I had an update to say it was in progress.

I fully intend to work and earn money and make a life for me and dd. I don’t want to be unemployed but my dd isn’t in any childcare and short of a job that lets me bring her with me I’m stuck until I leave and then i will be happy to put her in childcare as me and her are low risk.

I think it's always so easy for people like me to judge and think we could do it better when really we have no idea what it's like to be in another persons shoes. You sound like a good person/mum who just needs to make a good plan to make some changes to your life. I wish you all the best and apologise if my first response was not very helpful x

@Breastfeedingworries

I haven’t read the full thread so I apologise in advance if I’m repeating what has already been said.

I know when I needed to get my place I had to have a letter of eviction from my landlord (my mother) and I went down to the council with my letter and a few bags and told them I have nowhere to go.

I had tried a few times before to be moved however as I wasn’t homeless and I had a roof over my head - the council kept fobbing me off. Telling me I have to sort it out / then trying to get I contact with my mum to see if we could ‘work things out’/ and then giving me appointments to discuss my circumstance then telling me they couldn’t help.

When I had the letter in my hand and gave it to them - I was housed the same day.

Unless your actually homeless - they are very apprehensive to help and you will always be at the bottom of the list.

IsurvivedbutdidI thank you for your apology really appreciate it. I’m quite open to criticism, as believe me I get it a lot, but it’s really nice when it’s retracted.

Yeah I will have a letter, when I applied I put the 14th of jan, my mums going to write that. It’s a Thursday so might ask her to change date to the 10th so it’s weekend and I have some help but I don’t know if she’ll help me out or not. We’re both not speaking at the moment and the atmosphere isn’t good. I just want to make peace so Christmas is as Pleasant as can be.

Took me forever to be offered a council property due to my area. The council property was w shared tenancy with me and my sister that was put into our names after my mum passed away. It worked out fine until my sister had two kids and I had one so we were overcrowded. The council did nothing to try to rehouse apart from informing me to keep bidding, in the end I gave up and decided to go down the private route. It's expensive however if you were to take the private route depending on your earnings you could be eligible for housing benefit. As for the savings, If they are not on your name then you wouldn't need to declare them. If you are in desperate need to move then I would recommend taking a letter from my mum saying she is kicking you out and you will be put into temporary accommodation. There would be no reason for your child to be put into care just because you are homeless. Temporary accommodation can sometimes range from a hostel,studio flat or even an actual house or flat. But be warned you might be there for a while or less. Who knows but wish you all the best!

@Breastfeedingworries

I hope you don’t mind but I’m going to message you some info x

OP you sound like your self esteem is so low, calling yourself useless etc. I am sure you are not useless and living independently will be the making of you.

My friend had to go down the homeless route with her child. It took a few unpleasant months in temporary accommodation(she was moved several times with a couple of hours notice) but she now has a home for them both.
Just be aware that staying in a hotel paid by the council isn’t always a pleasant experience, my friend was given filthy rooms left a mess by previous people, the hotel didn’t clean the room but nor would they let l her to use their hoover etc to do it herself), they didn’t want to give fresh bedding despite her daughter having an accident etc, it was very difficult but hopefully it isn’t a common occurrence.

Thanks for the pm I’ve responded :)

I think it’s likely nothing will be done until I show up bags in hand on the date I’ve said. Thanks so much for advice.

No one called me today and there’s been no update so i think they won’t get in touch until closer the time.

I rang my council a month ago asking them if they could help me with housing. I told them that I'm living with my ex and that he has ask me and DD to live somewhere else. They were more than willing to help and offered a place in temp accommodation, help with privately renting etc. This is a London borough btw.

@Breastfeedingworries hi op
It's worth being aware that under the HRA (homelessness reduction act) the local authority may well try to do what they can to keep you in the family home with your Mum. This can in some cases include trying to mediate between you both and even offering her money to keep you in the family home. Obviously none of these are sure things to actually work and the local authority know this but they do try to do what they can to prevent you being homeless.

If you are made homeless and the Local Authority determine they owe you a duty they may offer you temporary accommodation and this can vary from a b&b through to a house, again all dependent on the area and what they have at their disposal.

Every local authority will have a housing/allocations policy so it might be worth reading your councils policy on their website to see what you are likely to be offered in terms of priority.

It often comes down to supply and demand in the area.

Good luck

Just so you know, families should not be in a B and B unless it’s a last resort and then only for 6 weeks. That is the law and not guidance. Councils try it but it is unlawful. The flip side is that they can house you miles away. London boroughs and Birmingham used Places with cheaper rentals, like Bradford Etc.

Some councils have schemes (sometimes called a new generation scheme) where if you stay with family for a year you become eligible for a housing offer.

The law changed a few years ago (homeless reduction act) so that the options are not so stark and in some areas that is helping people.

Lastly the Council can and do house you in the private rented sector if you are homeless- it’s a legitimate way to discharge its duty.

Shelter is best for advice not mumsnet! They are specialists. But really just apply to the council with all your circumstances and go from there.

Ha @taupeskies beat me to it!

I would argue that you are in a domestic abuse situation- I just think you don’t realise it. What your mum called you is horrible- that’s bound to damage your self esteem over time.

I think you are far more capable that you realise. The advice and support is out there you just need to know where to start.

It’s great that you’ve got the ball rolling with the council. Citizens advice can provide support in general. Also you need to make a claim to universal credit if you haven’t already (if you have savings under £16k). They will also refer you to any support you may need in other areas of your life- you just have to be open with them. Citizens Advice provide a service called Help to Claim and if you feel your dyslexia means you struggle with forms then you would be eligible for this support.

Good luck.

Oh and as to some of the comments on here that have been unkind- well that’s life isn’t it? In a room of a 100 people some will be twats- that’s all it tells you though, that they’re a twat, it says nothing about you. So try to let those comments go over your head. I think you already have enough criticism at home without also accepting it from complete strangers.

You'd be better off training for a job with decent pay. Or can you choose a branch of retail where you can work your way up?

You need to create a profile on your local Homechoice website.
That is the site the council uses
You will fill out all your details and be able to explain on there your situation. Make sure to include details of the alcohol issues with your mum making home life unbearable and that she wants you to leave etc.
Once your details are processed you will be able to bid on properties. Every thursday a new selection of properties come available.

You login to homechoice and press "bid" on the one you want. Most people only get 1 bid every week.

Until 20weeks pregnant you can only bud on 1 bedroom homes, then once you've provided your 20week scan you will be able to bid on 2beds.

The best way to get a home quickly is to bid on houses which have the least interest. Between Thursday to the following monday people do the bids, and you can see how many a property has. So if theres a flat with 5 bids and a house with 50, they you should bid on the flat if you want somewhere quickly.

Make your application asap as people in the same category of need as you, who have been registered longer will be ahead of you in the bidding priority.

I hope this all makes sense. I've been on homechoice for years, but I live in Cornwall and it's difficult here as theres not a good supply of homes so I'll probably be waiting more years.

@Screwcorona Homechoice isn't the website used for all local authorities. Some local authorities don't have a choice based lettings scheme and still allocate people properties themselves rather than letting them choose.

In most cases you won't be able to logon to a choice based lettings service until you've been verified by the local authority and set up with a login.

I’m not pregnant I have a dd aged 23 months I’m hopefully I won’t be housed in a b&b for long but who knows.

I haven’t heard from anyone, there’s an uneasy truce in the house, I don’t know how long it will last though.

Hi all.

It’s been awhile and I wanted to give an update (so often people don’t and we’re all left wondering)

I’ve been placed in band 2, council have actually been really nice and the lady I spoke to had a lot of time for me to talk. I said how I was feeling a failure 😞 but she was very supportive.

I’ve so far only been able to bid twice, (you can’t bid unless properties are suitable) I came 7th in the first out of 30 and 2nd in the second out of only 9! The latest I couldn’t bid as only few bungalows which are for older residents.

She said they’d be hardly any new ones week of Christmas and they don’t start again until the 7th so that’s my last chance in band 2, from the 14th which is their next week of properties I will be placed in temp accommodation but then I will be in band 1.

I will update after the 7th, please keep your fingers and your toes crossed for me.

Keeping everything crossed for you! I still see my house as a little miracle. The week before I was something like 94th on a bid. The next week I was 4th... then two people dropped out, so I was second. Then the woman ahead of me declined... and I got our home. That was the first week of January, 2016.

Just be aware that you most likely won't have carpets etc. This place was an absolute shell & I had to completely redecorate it on my own. I did get a small amount of money for that (£25 per room), but the most important thing was signing the tenancy agreement.

Good luck, and do, do, DO keep us updated. I'm rooting for you. Sounds like the lady at the council is too

Fingers and toes crossed. It'll be the making of you when you're away from your mum. Just you and child!

That’s great to hear, I just caught up on your thread! Good for you OP, you sound like a good mother and you will definitely be able to do it on your own! There may be some hard days to come but you will prove your mother wrong in the end!💕💕

Hi I just saw these posts!

I shall update on the 7th when I bid.
Christmas and the last few days have been so trying. My mother is making me wear a mask in every room of the house and she’s took the car keys (it’s her car) so I can’t get anywhere.

I feel so disappointed in myself I’ve let the control go on, through money and emotional abuse. I cannot wait to be free!

I just need a bus route and I will give the car back and save for my own. I want no ties with her. Everything she’s given is thrown back at me and I’ve always felt like the biggest failure.

Keep toes and fingers crossed for some good houses on the 7th! Xx