Worn out from husbands depression.

[RosieLemonade]

Just that really. Makes everything so difficult. Feel like I’m walking in egg shells. Poor DD was so looking forward to shopping for our Christmas tree and he was utterly miserable the whole time. Wish I had just taken her by myself but thought he would enjoy watching her enjoying herself.

Being with someone with poor mental health is exhausting. Do you want to stay with him?

Mine had anxiety. I don’t know how I juggled it all and managed.
If the tablets stopped working I wouldn’t stay, I couldn’t do that again.

What is your husband doing to help himself deal with his depression?

I have a serious and complex mental illness. My Fiance says he deals with it because he loves me and my mental health is only one facet of me and I have other qualities that he loves. I take meds, I have a psychiatrist and a cpn. He holds me through my crying and anxiety. Yes he feels frustrated and cross at times but that's usually because I put myself down so much. Mind you if I had been your husband going to select a tree with my family I would have at least pretended.

I split with my husband. (Depression wasn't only issue) honestly it sounds harsh but it was if a weight lifted off the whole house.

It really does grind you down doesn’t it. I’ve mentally checked out now just waiting for the worst of this pandemic to be over and we’ll divorce.

Is he on medication and getting help? My dh has depression but is brilliant on meds.. definitely worth staying for.
I’m sorry yours sucked the life out of shopping for a tree. I feel sorry for your DD.
Is he getting the right help?

He’s not getting any help at this particular moment in time. Makes me die inside how he acted today when DD was so excited. He just kept telling us to to hurry up.

I feel your pain and really hope there is some sort of release for you soon, my ex had depression (from excessive weed use) and refused to seek help for it, it was absolutely awful living with him and we split up eventually, wish I had done it years earlier though!

I don't think I could support and stay with a DP who hadn't tried to seek some support and treatment.

Mine was unwell with anxiety and depression and it was hard on everyone but he did go to the GP and get some medication which massively helped, also had talking therapy.

He may have depression, it he was also being rude and an arse. The two aren’t mutually exclusive.

It's really tough. But for your child's sake if not his, I'd be pushing him to get help.

I'd use today as a catalyst, if you think it's possible. If he realises what his condition is doing to his daughter, he might actually feel he should get help.

I was lucky. My husband used every ounce of what ability he had, to try to ensure that his anxiety and depression didn't affect his family. His condition was late onset and situational though, he had a background of normal family life to work with, which might have made it easier. He wasn't 100% successful, but failures were rare.

It was still hard though.

I am married to a woman with severe depression
I myself have anxiety issues.
We are a right pair!

However, DW is on appropriate medication. It took several years and sone intense therapy to get her to the place she is in now.
I must admit that I threatened to leave her when it first started because she made life totally joyless.
Lockdown is making her sad, she thrives on contact with people and her whole career has been based on those interactions.
I am supporting her in looking at more creative ways of working that allow some socially distanced face to face interventions. I am trying to be subtle but I know I am building up to an ultimatum.

She is so kind to me when my anxiety rises, she helped me when I couldn't face answering a call today. If I wasn't practicing mindfulness and taking anti-anxiety meds she would totally challenge me.

We are both trying to get more exercise and to count our blessings.

With regards to your husband, I think you should kindly and firmly tell him that he must speak to his GP, you will support him by being with him at the appointment (I presume it will be a phone call or Zoom)
I have hound that really helps because my wife feelt immense shame when he depression began.

Sending you 💐🎄💐 and a Cwtch for your daughter.
(Also fir your husband if you know he is a good man struggling)

My DHhas depression and anxiety OP and I know how hard it can be. I try my best to be supportive but sometimes it feels like it's just not enough.

What do you mean he is getting no help?
Is he self diagnosed?

Dont assume xx will make him happy.
Tell him before...if you can pretend to be happy come
If not dont

You cannot cure him
Protect yourself

Just do things with dd