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Original poster

How far away from your children are you when you are at work?

125 replies

Clearasmuddypuddles · 14/11/2020 07:24

I’m looking at a bee job but it is 20 miles and 35 minutes away from my children’s school and nursery. My husband is 40 minutes away in the other direction.

I think i’m probably being silly but I feel uneasy at being this far away and not being able to get to them quickly in an emergency. Would this worry anyone else? I do have form for ove thinking things!

OP posts:
CarlottaValdez · 14/11/2020 07:45

About 60-90 minutes on public transport (if not WFH). DH was usually close to the school but if he had a meeting somewhere further away it used to make me really nervous. I know that’s a bit irrational!

CoconutMangos · 14/11/2020 07:46

I used to be an hour and a half by car. I'm now 15 minutes by car. It makes me feel a lot better. Not because of emergencies but more I didn't want to be away from my baby for 14+ hours at a time. I'm now only away for 11(+) hours as I work shifts.

Constance1 · 14/11/2020 07:47

Now 10 mins walk. Before he was at a nursery at my husbands work so my husband was only 5 mins away from him at any given time. If we have to go back to our offices anytime soon we'll take it in turns to work from home as otherwise we'd be about an hour away (by public transport - for me 20 mins walk from work to Waterloo, then a 35 mins train then a 10min walk which feels way too far away).

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Jroseforever · 14/11/2020 07:48

It’s why I handed my notice in

I was travelling quite far and I always felt nervous that it would take my 5 hours to get back to my children if something happened at school.

They’re in primary but I reckon it will always stand even when at secondary!

Aurorie11 · 14/11/2020 07:51

It depended, we used to avoid both travelling to meetings away from our normal office on the same day, but we would have days when one left early to be able to collect kids from after school club and the other would drop kids and then travel and be away overnight, so there were days when both were about 2.5 hours away in the middle of the day

Original poster
Clearasmuddypuddles · 14/11/2020 07:52

Actually the hospital is nearer to my work than it is the children’s school so I guess I would meet them there if needed.

OP posts:
Suzi888 · 14/11/2020 07:54

We are a 15 minute walk away. But I wouldn’t worry in your case, that’s probably fairly normal for most people.

Merryhobnobs · 14/11/2020 07:57

12 miles for me but realistically often an hour as have to close my premises/inform people. Husband a 10 min walk but pre covid would often work away.

InTheLongGrass · 14/11/2020 08:01

I'm 20 miles away from primary, 23 miles from secondary, and even further from the hospital.
DH could be anything from 0.5mile to 250miles (typically 0.5 miles at the moment!).

taybert · 14/11/2020 08:02

We’re very similar to this- I’m 35-40 min away and husband is 45-50. It’s fine, we’ve needed to collect them when poorly a few times, and they’ve sat in the office and been fussed over until we’ve arrived. School have never said it’s a problem.

The majority of parents aren’t going to be there in minutes. Situations requiring hospitals aren’t common and if time is critical it’s an ambulance job, regardless of how close the parents are. That’s not meant to scare you but just trying to give perspective- it’s very easy to overthink these things!

Drogonssmile · 14/11/2020 08:03

DS2 is in the nursery on the hospital site where I work so about 1/4 mile! DS1 is about 2-3 miles away at school. I moved jobs though for that reason when we moved house. Otherwise I'd be about 30-40 mins drive away. DH could be anywhere in the UK so that's why it was important that I was close.

TheUpholder · 14/11/2020 08:03

I’m a 45 minute drive away. DH used to have a similar commute and we never felt it was an issue. He now he works 2 minutes away from the nursery so any requirements for early pick up will fall to him Grin

taybert · 14/11/2020 08:04

To add, from school, we’re another 45 min from the hospital in yet another direction! We didn’t plan that well at all!

Sceptre86 · 14/11/2020 08:04

My dh is an hour and a half away in rush hour traffic, otherwise 45 minutes. For myself it varies, could be 15 minutes away could be an hour and a half. Dh wfh on the days I work so he would be with them in 5 minutes thankfully. I think this is important and am thankful that circumstances mean he can wfh when I am at work.

NothingIsWrong · 14/11/2020 08:05

I'm mobile a lot so anything up to an hour. School KNOW this, and they also know DH works in an office 10min drive away.

Guess who they always call first?

Rae36 · 14/11/2020 08:07

I'm only 10 minutes away.

The one and only time I've been called to school when ds threw up I was an hour away having lunch and doing some Christmas shopping with my mum.

FuzzyPenguin · 14/11/2020 08:08

I work from home all the time so 5 mins walk from the school. My DH is about 15 min cycle away.

wellthatsunusual · 14/11/2020 08:09

When we're not working from home, we're both about an hour away. Our children are older now but it was the same when they were babies.

MsJuniper · 14/11/2020 08:09

I specifically looked for work within 20ish minutes of home for this reason (DS's school is 2 minutes from home). I was having no luck in my previous industry.

I ended up retraining and now work at a school 15 minutes away (10 if no traffic). My younger child goes to nursery at my school so I can actually see her from my window!

NatalieH2220 · 14/11/2020 08:10

On office days around an hour away (50 miles). I work from home a couple of days so it's a 5 min drive/30 min walk then.

PaperMonster · 14/11/2020 08:13

A 45 minute drive although in normal times when I’m out and about I could be further away or nearer. Haven’t even considered it tbh. When she was in nursery I chose one nearer to work and not far from my parents in case of emergency.

Passthecake30 · 14/11/2020 08:14

I moved jobs to be a 15min drive away when they were in year 1&3. Before that, I was about 90mins away. I thought I felt ok about the 90mins, but when I moved closer, it done wonders for my sense of ease. Ds is in year 8 and I’ve had to get to the school twice to collect him as he was ill/upset, I’ve never had to collect Dd (yet, touch wood).

minnie465 · 14/11/2020 08:16

DH is about 40 minutes away. I am approx 10 minutes away. I like knowing I'm near DS. I like that I will be able to drop him at schools in the morning when the time comes. I like that he only has to go to nursery from 8:50 to 5:10.
Recently a job came up that I've always said I'd love. I decided not to apply as it would mean being 45 mins away from DS again.

badlydrawnbear · 14/11/2020 08:22

It's about 15 minutes drive depending on traffic (could be a lot longer as it is in the city centre), but I don't drive so could take up to a hour on the bus etc. That is why I put on the emergency contact forms that they should call DH first in the event of an emergency, because he worked about 10 minutes away (he works from home at the moment) in a job that is much easier to leave part way through a day and can drive. I think we have only once been asked to pick a DC up from school though and they did call me but I wasn't at work that day. DH was also phoned to pick a DC up from nursery, who he took straight to the walk-in centre and an ambulance was called to take her to hospital.

Dollywilde · 14/11/2020 08:23

Just to remind everyone, it’s not long since the days when parents weren’t instantly contactable... I’m 31 but when I was 7 I had an accident at school needing stitches. My mum was a SAHM and we lived so close to school you could see it, but on the morning it happened she’d gone into town and obviously this was pre mobile phones, the school receptionist took me and they just kept trying our home phone number. Mum got to me a couple of hours later after she got home and heard the answerphone message. I don’t remember being particularly traumatised! So ‘being able to get there in minutes’ is quite a new thing really.