How to keep the darkness at bay?

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I'm in my mid 40s and have felt in recent years a bit of gloom creeping in. I think its just the usual things getting older, parents getting old and unwell, feeling like time is running out.

I am married but I don't have children due to medical issues and although I've always been ok with that I imagine that children might distract you from peering into the void so to speak but that might not be true.

I am basically ok but I do feel aware of the sadness and worries of getting old. I know that in many ways Im still young but I always think that if I did this or that I'd be x age by the time I achieved anything and it always seems too old.

Just a few years ago I was young. I know this way of thinking does me no good at all.

If you can relate to this how do you shut the door on the gloom and maintain a sense of possibility in your life?

It's hard at the moment with restrictions but a full diary helps. Things to look forward to, holidays and day trips, meeting up with friends. Looking into the void is something to steer clear of or you go down the meaning of life road which is upsetting. I'm late 60s and have achieved nothing of note (2 children but I don't take credit for their achievements) and my generation are beginning to die off which does concentrate the mind somewhat. Are you happy in your job or could you do something more fulfilling. I've been filling shoeboxes for the homeless this Christmas and it's been a bit of a wake-up call for me tbh. Looking into the void from my viewpoint now seems a luxury and entitlement. I don't allow myself to wallow in it any more and a brisk walk usually sorts my head. I hope you find a way out of it 💐

I got like this as I went through peri menopause....it was my oestrogen levels dropping. Hrt helped significantly as it gave me some of my oomph back to face the other stuff. So oomph to get some fresh air, exercise, see friends and start to try new stuff.

Trying to do a new thing every day, doesn’t have to be big, walk a different way to work, cook something different, put clothes together differently...

I've had several years of awful stuff happening and I've struggled with the kind of feelings you write about. I've got a dog who has kept me away from the edge and kept me sane. I don't look into the future any more - just one day or one week at a time at the moment. Pre covid I would always try to have something to look forward to. I keep myself occupied mentally and look for pleasure in the small things. I walk the dog in the morning briefly and make a conscious effort to look at the sky.

Also read a PP. I do look into the void quite a bit. It helps because it makes me think we're not on this planet for long. It's a beautiful place and we're phenomenally lucky to be here at all. We don't have to achieve stuff or live some 'perfect' lifestyle. We can just enjoy actually being and that's the reward.

The above couple of posts reminded of something I read that helped. 'Don't go looking for happiness but find happiness in what you do' . I now look for pleasure in autumn colours and birdsong and good books - mindfulness really.