Living with morning people when you're not one yourself

[MedusasBadHairDay]

Largely lighthearted thread, because the colder, darker mornings are making me even less of a morning person than I am normally - and it's never been my favourite bit of the day.

Unfortunately 8yo DS is not just a morning person, but an extremely chatty child. I'm pretty certain he'd be happy if he could talk non stop from the second he wakes until the second he sleeps. Which is great, given he was a late speaker and has always had speech difficulties (which are miles better than they used to be). So I'm reluctant to discourage the speaking, or make him self conscious about it, but also I'd like there to be a gap of more than 30 seconds between my eyes opening in the morning and a monologue about minecraft/dinosaurs/the history of Britain/etc. I could try getting up before him, but he wakes up between 6am and 6.30am no matter what, and I'm definitely not at my best if I get up before 6!

Honestly in an ideal world I'd have at least 30 minutes of peace and quiet to wake up, but I know that's never going to happen

So how do you cope, Or are you the one who wants up instantly raring too go?

DS was allowed to get in bed with me and game with his tablet on silent. The longer I slept/ dozed, the more time he got on Minecraft. It worked a treat.

DS is allowed to watch TV downstairs if he wakes up before us (though we had some fun with that initially when we caught him downstairs at 4am). But when he hears my alarm going off he comes bounding up the stairs to talk to me. So I get to sleep to the time I want, just no nice gradual waking.

Ds is just like this. I found that if the cat is on my bed when he comes bounding in, he’ll talk to the cat instead of me and dh. So I encourage the cat to sleep with me all the time now.

Is the cat now severely sleep deprived and interviewing new owners 😀 @VenusClapTrap?

Oft I was going to say it was ok to kill people who are chatty as soon as your eyes are open but I feel you can’t say that about a kid. Gag them? Bribe them with haribo?

This is what she thinks about the arrangement, Fluffy

I send my morning loving dd and dh to the living room/ kitchen and croakily request coffee and toast please while I snuggle with my lie-in loving toddler in bed. I consider this a luxury that I have earned by doing pretty much every bedtime on my own for years as 'they only want me' and entering into every conversation about Disney princesses started after 8am with absolute enthusiasm and interest so I don't feel guilty.

Well it’s fair do’s, they don’t have any problem waking us up at silly o’clock wanting things @VenusClapTrap.

I am more of a morning person than I used to be but I still don't want the chattiest human being ever (i.e my ds age 9) to start rambling at me about spiderman et al from the minute I wake up. So we also do the i-pad thing. It keeps him happy.
Can you get a quieter alarm so he doesn't hear it from downstairs? I know a fitbit can be set as an alarm that just vibrates gently agsinst your wrist.
Waking up by stealth

Our dog is the least morning person in the world - she grumbles and tries to hide her head under her bed if we are too noisy in the morning. It's like she's got a hangover every day.

I'm the same. My son wakes at 5am. I'm not ready at 5am. I set him up downstairs and then go and have a bath 🤣

* Honestly in an ideal world I'd have at least 30 minutes of peace and quiet to wake up, but I know that's never going to happen grin*

There is your answer
Get to thirty mins earlier

I am a morning person OP sadly my dh is not! He is a proper night owl often up til 2am thats totally fine by me.I never wake up when he comes into the bedroom I never hear him or the tv downstairs.We just do our own thing.I can get up really early with no problems but i cant stay up late at the other end of the day,by 11 pm I am done!!! It just works for us and doesnt cause any issues at all.We plod along just great!

Well quite, @Fluffycloudland77! She’s old and rather creaky now but she’s done her fair share of presenting us with live mice at 3am over the years...

I can't recommend the sunrise alarm clock enough - mine starts getting light 30mins before the alarm goes off and so by the time it does beep i'm practically awake and therefore much less grumpy.

@Jroseforever

* Honestly in an ideal world I'd have at least 30 minutes of peace and quiet to wake up, but I know that's never going to happen grin*

There is your answer
Get to thirty mins earlier

I'd have to get up at 5.30 to get half an hour before he wakes!

I'm wondering about a silent alarm, but it does mean that in order to get that quiet time I need to stay in my bed in order to not alert him with creaky floorboards. Which sounds great except I would absolutely fall back asleep.. what am I saying? That sounds great too - shame work won't agree

Not sure if it will work but I have this problem so have asked for one of those daylight alarm clocks for Christmas. They can slowly wake you up with gradually increasing "natural" light, so you wake without noise and it's not so abrupt. I'm willing to give it a go because I'll try anything to alleviate the pain of mornings!

I live with a morning person (my OH) and turns out I have far too much energy and am too talkative in the evening for him!

I’m a morning person, my son is a morning person, my partner is not a morning person at all. He has an app which supposedly wakes him up during his lightest sleep time in a 30 minute window, it means he is a teeny bit less miserable in the morning.

Just start getting up early and your clock will change. DH and DD1 are fucking night owls. I get up early because I start work at 7pm and so go to bed at 10pm. They keep me awake with their chatting and laughing and DH regularly wakes me when he comes to bed at 2pm and then I can't get to sleep again (due to his snoring) and am shattered the next day.

Tell your 8yo that no-one gets up before 7am, he's plenty old enough to follow that rule. He can read in bed if he wakes up earlier (and yes, I have 2 children who need that rule as well as the night owl).

My DP is a morning person. I can sense him leaning over me to check if I'm awake so he can launch into his endless stream of consciousness. Sometimes I'm in a really uncomfy position or have lain on an arm so it's gone dead but I hold out as long as I can so I don't get 'ooh you're awake now blah blah bastardising blah' arrrrg

We are all different. My only concern is if you are not a morning person because of alcohol consumption or some other lifestyle reason, which does not seem to be the case.

I think the 'no talking before a certain time' or the cat suggestion are the best ones.

@CountFosco

Just start getting up early and your clock will change. DH and DD1 are fucking night owls. I get up early because I start work at 7pm and so go to bed at 10pm. They keep me awake with their chatting and laughing and DH regularly wakes me when he comes to bed at 2pm and then I can't get to sleep again (due to his snoring) and am shattered the next day.

Tell your 8yo that no-one gets up before 7am, he's plenty old enough to follow that rule. He can read in bed if he wakes up earlier (and yes, I have 2 children who need that rule as well as the night owl).

It doesn't work like that. Many of us owls have longer body clocks than larks and would be quite happy with a 25 hour day. I can be up before 6, if I have to (but please don't even try to bloody talk to me until I've had my muesli, banana and bucket of coffee) but still not feel ready to fall asleep until after midnight, despite that coffee being my one and only caffeine shot of the day.

I used to work an early shift, so can safely say that no matter how often I force myself to wake up early I'm never at my best in the mornings. I was just permanently grouchy

Also I love that one person's reaction to a light hearted thread about not being a morning person is to wonder about whether it's due to alcohol. Just to put your mind at rest, I rarely drink, maybe once a month at most and even then 1 glass is usually my limit. Even if I did drink more I haven't been a morning person since I was a child. Some of us just aren't. My 6yo DD isn't a morning person either, and is extremely grumpy if he brother tries to get her to play first thing.

I used to work an early shift, so can safely say that no matter how often I force myself to wake up early I'm never at my best in the mornings. I was just permanently grouchy

Also I love that one person's reaction to a light hearted thread about not being a morning person is to wonder about whether it's due to alcohol. Just to put your mind at rest, I rarely drink, maybe once a month at most and even then 1 glass is usually my limit. Even if I did drink more I haven't been a morning person since I was a child. Some of us just aren't. My 6yo DD isn't a morning person either, and is extremely grumpy if he brother tries to get her to play first thing.