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Friend has gone bonkers

14 replies

AngelinaDelight · 10/11/2020 20:59

(and I really need a little advice).

Even on this semi anonymous forum I am going to be careful what I write because I hate to betray the confidences of a friend. So I'm going to speak generally instead of going into the specifics of friend's situation.

We go way back, many years, good pals.
She had a very tough year in many ways: work stress, family stress, then more stress due to the pandemic.
We don't live near each other, when she called (regularly) she sounded really down. I told her I was concerned.
Anyway more recently I had no phone calls and was concerned as we usually catch up that way regularly.
Googled her name to see if she had work updates as these post publicly due to nature of her job sometimes.
Discovered she has a new social media profile where she has become immersed in the anti-mask brigade, absolutely vitriolic about folk like me who wear masks, comply with lockdown, etc.
She was also posting a lot about mentally unwell, but blaming it all on the Covid "hoax" and lockdown etc.
This was now several weeks ago.
A more worrying development (very worrying) is that there are references to a sick child which sounds very much like my own child. She knows the history of my child's illness and treatment well from previous conversations. She seems to be telling this story but pretending its a relative of hers (she doesn't have children). The details of the story shared are quite specific, I guess there is a 1/100 chance that someone else in her family has had same illness, treatment etc. and she has never mentioned it to me in the course of our friendship? It's unlikely though isn't it. She is using this story to further blame the Covid "hoax" for children suffering, which is very different to the actual situation for my family, but all the other details are the same.

What on earth am I going to do? I have tried to call her but no answer. Then have tried NOT to call her because I honestly don't know how to approach this.

OP posts:
Fluffycloudland77 · 10/11/2020 21:25

I wouldn’t call her again, she knows you’ve called.

oldbagface · 10/11/2020 21:31

Block her and pretend you never knew her. I have had a similar experience recently. Two people who think the virus is a hoax sending eachother snarky messages about me and my family as we are following the rules. When I found out I was angry and then hurt. I've blocked them and they will need me before I need them. Now a few weeks on I am not angry or hurt. I just pity their ignorance. It's not worth your energy to give her a seconds thought.

slipperywhensparticus · 10/11/2020 21:31

Can you report it to the social media platform as its about your child

workwoes1 · 10/11/2020 21:50

I do understand how this is troubling for you, and it does sound like she's gone a little of her rocker and could well be stealing your DCs experience. I also understand that it's upsetting that she's using it to support a damaging movement.

However, there is no way you can actually prove this is what she is going. I think the best thing you can do is block and try to totally forget about her. It's sad she is probably mentally unwell, but I think due to the circumstances you're better off keeping well away.

AngelinaDelight · 10/11/2020 21:58

OK thanks all. I am trying to do what you all say, stay well clear, don't engage. I don't think it will end well if I do given either her mental state or the beliefs she now seems to hold...

I am worried for her safety as she has been suicidal but I can't do anything other than maybe pick up the phone and say I care if she calls. But don't know if I will even be able to do that given the horrendous way she now talks about mask wearers like me, people who "comply".

I don't think I can report the social media posts, if she ever used my child's name I could then I guess but she is pretending it's a relative of her own.

Stressful and upsetting

OP posts:
DianaT1969 · 10/11/2020 22:34

I know somebody who has become a conspiracy theorist. She thinks she's more intelligent than everyone else (she's really not). Her conversation is completely contradictory. It's a hoax (yet she has hardly left the house since March). The government are up to something. But she has no idea what. She can't explain why so many countries are taking it seriously too.
I let her crack on and thank my lucky stars she rarely calls. If I never hear from her again that will be fine.

Doyoumind · 10/11/2020 22:39

It sounds like she's having mental health issues but unless you can contact someone close to her and raise concerns I would just block and ignore.

Lostinacloud · 10/11/2020 22:40

Can’t you just accept that your friend has a differing opinion to you and not let it affect your relationship? Covid is hopefully only a temporary issue so it won’t be between you forever.

NotTheRealAngelaFernandez · 10/11/2020 22:43

So many people are buying into this rubbish and there is NOTHING you can do. Just let go, OP. Block her and move on.

StrippedFridge · 10/11/2020 22:48

She's using your child and your personal story. You'd be fine to not pick up the phone if she does call.

BlueJava · 10/11/2020 23:14

Don't worry about her safety she is an adult after all. Just protect your own mental health and your child. Blocker her on everything and move on.

GabsAlot · 10/11/2020 23:18

it does sound like a breakdown all you can do is be there if she says she needs help

theres alot of conspiracy thoeries going round with people saying they have evidence its fake and theyre trying to miscrochip us with the a vaccine alot of vulnerable people believe these crackpots it somhow makes them feel better

Legoandloldolls · 10/11/2020 23:25

If she is mentally unwell all you can do is reach out and then step back for her to contact. If her socail media is upsetting then it's fine to block her. I have blocked my mil as she is increasing further from my core values. It's a unnecessary stress you dont need to see

slipperywhensparticus · 11/11/2020 09:33

@Lostinacloud

Can’t you just accept that your friend has a differing opinion to you and not let it affect your relationship? Covid is hopefully only a temporary issue so it won’t be between you forever.
This would be fine if she wasn't using her child's lived experience to make a point
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