Co sleeping advice please

[HenrysHome]

DS is 6 weeks old, reflux and cmpa. I have tried everything under the sun to get him to sleep safely at night. He hates being swaddled, white noise, dummies and his next to me. He will only fall asleep upright and then can be persuaded to move onto his side. It’s really effecting my bond with him and I’m not enjoying being a mum at all. I’m going to have to start co sleeping to preserve my sanity and my marriage but have massive anxiety around SIDS - please tell me how I can co sleep safely x

Safe cosleeping is not unsafe if done properly. Cosleeping is a cultural norm in the majority of the world and it’s normal for new horns to only sleep when they are in contact with their Mum. I will get a couple of links for you.....

How to cosleep safely
www.lullabytrust.org.uk/wp-content/uploads/Safer-sleep-for-babies-a-guide-for-parents-web.pdf

Normal baby sleep
www.basisonline.org.uk/

Co sleeping is the best thing we ever did and completely turned around how I feel about being a mum. It's really important that you read up on how to do it safely but also to trust your instincts. If you're also breastfeeding then the "sweet sleep" book by la Leche league was a really useful resource for me. There's also the UK co-sleepers Facebook group who can be very helpful but a bit militant at times.

Thanks for the replies everyone. This might be a silly question but does baby still have to be on their back? Does their head need to be flat against the mattress or can it be propped on the crook of my arm?

The baby should be flat rather than propped on you.

I always had DD (I only co-slept with one) lower down as that meant she had free access to feed.

If needed you can raise the end of your bed or mattress a little to give a bit of angle. Either a book or furniture raiser under the legs of your bed, or a couple of rolled towels under the mattress will give you a little elevation.

Any tips for getting baby to sleep on their back? My ds absolutely will not tolerate it!

Just a note about the SIDS fear. Safe co-sleeping doesn't increase the risk of SIDS. SIDS is sudden infant death syndrome which often (but not always) happens when babies are alone in cots, hence why it was given the nickname Cot Death. Deaths that have been attributed to co-sleeping generally have a cause - often asphyxiation - and they often occur as a result of an unsafe sleeping environment (too much bedding, accidental co-sleeping when exhausted or on sofas, parents under the influence of alcohol or drugs etc. So co-sleeping won't increase your baby's risk of SIDS but it is important to ensure you are doing it safely. The links upthread are probably a good place to start.

None of my babies would sleep on their backs. They tended to nap on me in the day and sleep on me in the evening and then we went up to bed together. I think they actually slept on their tummies or their sides (often attached to the breast) while co-sleeping, which I realise is against current advice so I'm not recommending you do that, just telling you how I did it.

Congratulations on your little one. 😍

I tried it once and woke up with DD wedged under my side. It was awful she was like panting when I moved she was only weeks old.

That being said - now she’s older (10 month) I’ve braved it again when she was poorly and I put her higher than me and DP so she couldn’t actually get under me and that worked really well and have done it most nights now until she was back in her room.

Just read up on safe sleeping (no pillows ect)