WhatsApp group help!

[greyinganddecaying]

A class WhatsApp group is driving me mad!

It was supposed to be for school-related information, but is full of unrelated chat and is quite cliquey, so even if I post I'm usually ignored.

I've tried muting it (although can still see messages if I go into the app to message someone else)

I tried archiving it, but the moment someone posts a message it reappears.
I really want to delete it, but don't want to miss out on some information etc that my kids need (especially things like a meet up in the park when we're allowed again etc).

Any ideas on how I can remove it from my current chat list but still be able to dip in and out?

I think you can mute for 12 months - would that help ? I have a similar group I mute week by week

Muting it is the only way I find. Then just go in and scroll through the guff when you're looking for something specific.

You can pin chats so they appear at the top of your list. Maybe pin a couple that you use frequently like your DH or family groups so that this one doesn't appear at the top when a new message arrives.

Muting is ok, but it's still at the top of the list with a big red number indicating the number of unread messages whenever I log in!

I may have FOMO, but feel I need to check it because it's there. How can I remove it/stop myself doing this?

@TFSRM

You can pin chats so they appear at the top of your list. Maybe pin a couple that you use frequently like your DH or family groups so that this one doesn't appear at the top when a new message arrives.

That is a great idea! I'm going to try that - thank you!

I have the same thing OP but with a baby group which I really regret joining 🙊 Lots of competitive parenting and off topic posts about covid.

Unfortunately I'm likely to see all of the women at nursery/real life baby groups once they start up again so I don't want to leave as I think they'll be offended. Like you I've tried muting and archiving but they're not that effective.

Pinning other conversations to the top is a brilliant idea though, I'm going to give that a go.

Maybe come out of the group, if they are cliquey and not the type of people you would socialise with normally then why keep the group if they meet up specially at the park.
It may be best getting the numbers of mothers you do get on with and sort play dates out that way.
My daughter is now 9 years old and I have now only realised the last year or so that children meet friends in their own way, through school or activities you do not need to go out of your way to join in the uncomfortable clicks when you could hock up with people you do like and enjoy their company.

@MommaLion87

Maybe come out of the group, if they are cliquey and not the type of people you would socialise with normally then why keep the group if they meet up specially at the park. It may be best getting the numbers of mothers you do get on with and sort play dates out that way. My daughter is now 9 years old and I have now only realised the last year or so that children meet friends in their own way, through school or activities you do not need to go out of your way to join in the uncomfortable clicks when you could hock up with people you do like and enjoy their company.

I did think about this, but my DC is so ridiculously sociable it's more for his sake

If it were just me I think I'd have gone some time ago (unless FOMO struck again!)

You can only pin 3 other chats to the top, but it's a good start!

I'm not a parent and this is probably not helpful at all. But after watching The Social Dilemma, Screened Out (both on Netflix) and reading the Rise of Surveillance Capitalism and Digital Minimalism on the impact of smartphones and getting concerned about my own mental health I deleted Facebook and was trying to find ways to reduce my smartphone use. Then, fortuitously, my smartphone broke and I was unable to buy a new one so I went without and just used an old Nokia. I missed Whatsapp a lot less than I thought I would and actually found my mental health improved from not constantly checking my phone. I found that if I needed to know something important someone would usually tell me. When people texted me I found it difficult to text back so I would usually give them a call which was much nicer. I have Skype on my computer so can still chat with people who have Skype when I'm on my computer. I found that when I spoke to people on the phone or met up with them the conversations were more fulfilling as we had a lot more to say due to not being in touch every day. I'm sure this is more difficult to do as a parent but I wonder if you could choose one or two people you like more than the others and have a catch up on the phone every now and then?

It may not be possible but I'm just putting out there because I've found that it has really improved my quality of life. Also, if you just tell people you are getting rid of Whatsapp for mental health reasons it solves the problem of offending people by leaving specific groups. I know it's drastic but I just wanted to fly the flag for digital minimalism in case it appealed to you.