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Original poster

Can I just have a little pity party?

20 replies

Stegasaurusmum · 29/10/2020 20:26

Half term has been a bit of a disaster all round..

Failed Mot cost 500 to keep my car going
DDs pet rats both got respiratory infections... 1 pts, 1 just about surviving but medication morning and evening plus £200 vets bills so far, prob about another 100 to come.
Got a ticket, 35 quid..
I've got tonsillitis and feel horrible, throat like knives
I've got a houseful of unfinished jobs (left by ex) like no carpets or flooring to finish which I've paid out for but just can't face starting it. Every time I do stuff I feel good but also awful as it was stuff we had planned and its only so we can sell in 2 years to buy other houses...I love this house but it just feels so pointless making it nice...or at least less draughty..
Leaky bathroom into the room below, no bloody idea what's causing it...
DS has been up at 5.30 every day since the clocks changed.. I'm done in and he's always still bloody awake at 9pm..
My DD is super fucking rude at the moment, I just asked her to put something away into the fridge after she'd used it and her response 'you left it out'. She's 10.
Just heard I've got to manage school drop offs and pick ups for 2 weeks as my mum who usually does it, now has to isolate for 14 days as she's in Cyprus on holiday.. I can't take time off, I'm a teacher. Ex has form for leaving all child related responsibilities to me, I've asked him to take time off from his much more important job, not holding my breath...
Will barely see my bloke for several weeks as my ex has got to go to South Africa and self isolate, so 3 weeks of no help with the kids, straight after no mid week contact due to the after school drop off situation 😢

Feel like sacking everything off and hibernating.

Sorry, just wanted to have a whinge.

I know people have it worse, I know. Just hoping to drink wine and wallow for a bit.

Or, buy a scratch card? My luck might change!

OP posts:
Volcanite · 30/10/2020 07:19

I couldn't leave this unanswered. I'd be having a pity party too with all that going on. One thing from your list is enough for most, let alone everything at once. I hope your rat pulls through Flowers.

Can you get your favourite food treats in and get half an hour with something to watch read without being interrupted? I'm coming out of self isolation today and first thing on my list is to get cake! I sometimes put myself last, but that is because very little gets done if I don't instigate it Hmm. I hope you get a bit of respite soon.

And the early wakings are just awful. My six year old came in jolly as anything at 5 to 6 this morning, wishing me a happy Halloween. A bit early on all counts Halloween Grin

ShortSilence · 30/10/2020 07:22

That sounds utterly shit OP, and I really sympathise. Flowers

SnuggyBuggy · 30/10/2020 07:22

That's a lot to be dealing with. No shame in a pity party.

ShortSilence · 30/10/2020 07:23

Just seen it’s from last night. I hope today will be better. Tonsillitis can be severe, do you have a course of ABs? Are you able to stay hydrated? Softly set jelly is good, it slides down without much active swallowing or friction

gggrrrargh · 30/10/2020 07:25

I’d be having a pity party just for the tonsillitis bit alone much less the huge amount of other things! Whinge away, take each day at a time, and hope you feel better very soon

Original poster
Stegasaurusmum · 30/10/2020 07:49

Thanks guys, feel a bit silly today... Have ABs, managed to have a day of them and some ibuprofen and it is tentitively better this morning, hopefully I'll start to feel better by the weekend..
But, delightfully, I got my period today, after a week since the last one (mini pill, thanks so much😬)
Still haven't heard back from the ex about how we are going to manage 2 weeks of no childcare...

Urgh. Going to wallow in a bath in a bit, carve a bloody pumpkin and try to crack on with finding a leak and dealing with it....

I might actually buy a scratchcard too, worth a bloody try!

OP posts:
Crakeandoryx · 30/10/2020 07:50

You have a lot of shit happening. How are you still going! Amazingly strong 💐.

NoGoodPunsLeft · 30/10/2020 07:53

Hope you enjoy your bath.

I would make funding the leak a priority, I had one in my old house, came home from work one day to find a big circle of plaster on the dining table Shock it was a slow leak from a pipe under the floor boards.

TheYearOfSmallThings · 30/10/2020 07:59

That's a very rough time you're going through! I went through a similar phase in 2016 - everything I touched turned to shit, to the point that I was almost afraid to try anything.
It ended eventually of course, but I still remember how every new setback (and most of them were small in themselves) felt like another punch on a sore place.
The only thing that got me through was venting my outrage at the world to my unfortunate friends, and being fed chocolate and reassured that I should just keep plodding, and things would improve.

Hope your plod is nearly over and you get out the other side soon.

lifestooshort123 · 30/10/2020 08:24

You deserve a pity party with all that going on! Don't forget that tonsillitis is not just in the throat but can make you ache and feel a bit depressed so once the antibiotics kick in you should feel a bit more on top of things. I can't get over the vet's bill for the rats though - I know you see them as pets but to me they're just rodents. I hope today is a better day and good luck with the scratch card! 💐

lazyfecker · 30/10/2020 09:24

Wow you poor soul! 😭 you deserve a moan - that is an awful lot coming at you at once!

I would concentrate on your health first - once you start feeling stronger you will be able to prioritise what to tackle first.

In the meantime, be your own best friend and spoil yourself a bit.

You never know - you could have a few years of no problems once you've got all this lot out of the way at once Grin

saracorona · 30/10/2020 09:52

Oh the life of a single parent. I remember being so ill (migraine) one time, I went round the neighbors with a toddler under one arm and a bucket in the other, I couldn't stop heaving. Do get the leak done, I too had a minor leak over the kitchen. I had just turned from the finishing touches of the dinner, stepped out, shouted the kids and the ceiling came down.
Keep your humor, it will get you through. The worst times becomes the stuff of legends in the future. My adult kids talk with great fondness of the financially worst Christmas we had. It was tough at the time, Iceland had sold it's last bargain Turkey and I stood there crying, with my Daily Mirror voucher. The kids at the time wanted to die. We got a Turkey from the Manager, it was so big, I had to carry the toddler and put the turkey in the pram. Then cut it up to fit in the oven. There was tears, tantrums and cracked up laughter, they say it was our best Christmas. We no doubt romanticize the past, but it makes us smile.

TheYearOfSmallThings · 30/10/2020 09:59

You never know - you could have a few years of no problems once you've got all this lot out of the way at once

That did genuinely happen for me! And then...you know...pandemic. But that's not personal.

Original poster
Stegasaurusmum · 30/10/2020 10:19

Thanks so much everyone, I feel better and did laugh at the turkey in the pram 😂😂

I've had a bath, feel better but yeah, achey, teary and a bit hot! Not in a good way either 😂😂

Pet rats, yeah I know... They are actually very sweet and lovely pets but the second one is not doing great, just hoping she pulls through, it's been exactly a year since our kitten was hit by a car and we had a £1000 vet bill, plus I had tonsillitis and then a quinsy, also was in the middle of horrible arguments with now ex DH... So I guess I'm doing better than last halloween 😂

I'm going to crack on with jobs, tidy up, take the kids to find Halloween costumes, take them to the park where I can wrap up, sit on a bench and let them run riot 😂😂and hope that at some point today my ex will reply and tell me if he's going to look after our children for their inset day on Monday or help get them to school..🤔. I've called in favours and have most other days covered... Its going to be a manic 2 weeks but we will manage.

I've been ill before and the ex was either no help at all, offered no sympathy or just went to work as usual... I will never forget him going to work as normal when I'd hurt my back so badly I couldn't lift DD who was less than a year old, I had to get downstairs on my bum, carrying her on my lap.. Or when he left me to have a scan on my own after a miscarriage... So again, better off than previous years!!

Things to be grateful for...

My luck has to come in, I've got at least 2 quid in loose change I can waste on scratchcards 😂
The kids are going to his on Saturday night, after I've filled them with sweets 😂😂

My bloke is bloody lovely and despite my yukky throat and raging hormones still wants to see me Saturday and look after me (he's a keeper)

My ceiling hasn't fallen in yet 😂😂

Gallows humour right?!

OP posts:
lazyfecker · 30/10/2020 11:02

@Stegasaurusmum

Thanks so much everyone, I feel better and did laugh at the turkey in the pram 😂😂

I've had a bath, feel better but yeah, achey, teary and a bit hot! Not in a good way either 😂😂

Pet rats, yeah I know... They are actually very sweet and lovely pets but the second one is not doing great, just hoping she pulls through, it's been exactly a year since our kitten was hit by a car and we had a £1000 vet bill, plus I had tonsillitis and then a quinsy, also was in the middle of horrible arguments with now ex DH... So I guess I'm doing better than last halloween 😂

I'm going to crack on with jobs, tidy up, take the kids to find Halloween costumes, take them to the park where I can wrap up, sit on a bench and let them run riot 😂😂and hope that at some point today my ex will reply and tell me if he's going to look after our children for their inset day on Monday or help get them to school..🤔. I've called in favours and have most other days covered... Its going to be a manic 2 weeks but we will manage.

I've been ill before and the ex was either no help at all, offered no sympathy or just went to work as usual... I will never forget him going to work as normal when I'd hurt my back so badly I couldn't lift DD who was less than a year old, I had to get downstairs on my bum, carrying her on my lap.. Or when he left me to have a scan on my own after a miscarriage... So again, better off than previous years!!

Things to be grateful for...

My luck has to come in, I've got at least 2 quid in loose change I can waste on scratchcards 😂
The kids are going to his on Saturday night, after I've filled them with sweets 😂😂

My bloke is bloody lovely and despite my yukky throat and raging hormones still wants to see me Saturday and look after me (he's a keeper)

My ceiling hasn't fallen in yet 😂😂

Gallows humour right?!

Also we're here for you too GrinThanks
lazyfecker · 30/10/2020 11:03

@saracorona

Oh the life of a single parent. I remember being so ill (migraine) one time, I went round the neighbors with a toddler under one arm and a bucket in the other, I couldn't stop heaving. Do get the leak done, I too had a minor leak over the kitchen. I had just turned from the finishing touches of the dinner, stepped out, shouted the kids and the ceiling came down. Keep your humor, it will get you through. The worst times becomes the stuff of legends in the future. My adult kids talk with great fondness of the financially worst Christmas we had. It was tough at the time, Iceland had sold it's last bargain Turkey and I stood there crying, with my Daily Mirror voucher. The kids at the time wanted to die. We got a Turkey from the Manager, it was so big, I had to carry the toddler and put the turkey in the pram. Then cut it up to fit in the oven. There was tears, tantrums and cracked up laughter, they say it was our best Christmas. We no doubt romanticize the past, but it makes us smile.
Wow that Christmas won't be forgotten 😂
caringcarer · 30/10/2020 17:09

Stegasaurusmum you need soft ice cream. It numbs your throat and sooths it too. Tell your dd Mummy is feeling poorly and will she be a good girl and help. Try to get plenty of fluids and rest as soon as DC go to bed. I am assuming you have antibiotics. In a few days it will feel better. If you are still unwell on Monday phone in sick. I would be crying if I had all you have going on at the moment.

lazyfecker · 31/10/2020 13:53

How are things looking for you today OP?

Original poster
Stegasaurusmum · 02/11/2020 21:05

Oh thanks so much for asking, a whole load better... The antibiotics started working about Saturday, DDs pet rat has improved a little so hopefully might pull through, although more vets bills to pay, however the ex has now offered to give me some thing towards it... Have sorted all the school drop offs etc now by calling in favours so that panic is over, it'll be a manic week though..
So not all as bad as it was... Oh but of course lockdown.. 🤦‍♀️ I still get to go to work of course as I'm a teacher 🙄 and still have a leak but only if I use the shower... So I'll just stay smelly and no one will come near me, covid safe 😂

Definitely things don't seem as bleak but they are still fairly shitty 😂😂

OP posts:
lazyfecker · 03/11/2020 07:38

@Stegasaurusmum

Oh thanks so much for asking, a whole load better... The antibiotics started working about Saturday, DDs pet rat has improved a little so hopefully might pull through, although more vets bills to pay, however the ex has now offered to give me some thing towards it... Have sorted all the school drop offs etc now by calling in favours so that panic is over, it'll be a manic week though.. So not all as bad as it was... Oh but of course lockdown.. 🤦‍♀️ I still get to go to work of course as I'm a teacher 🙄 and still have a leak but only if I use the shower... So I'll just stay smelly and no one will come near me, covid safe 😂

Definitely things don't seem as bleak but they are still fairly shitty 😂😂

Glad there's a bit of improvement in your situation OPSmile you still have a lot on though. Still got your sense of humour I see Grin good luck with it all xxx
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