Interesting observation about my cat since his brother died

[OscarRIP]

I acquired two tabby brothers fifteen years ago from a lady who kept them in a flat since kittens. When she became pregnant she decided to find a more suitable home for them and I was lucky enough to see her advert in a local pet shop.

They have had a wonderful life since with full access to outdoors in a safe low-car area and, although litter brothers, were not affectionate with each other more like sibling rivals.

Osc died on 5th October after a short illness and he had been a noisy cat, miowing to us regularly. Jumps was the silent one.

Now Jumps is miowing more to me, particularly when he wants door open, or when he feels it is tea time, or when I am not sitting so he can sit with me. This is something Oscar did and Jumps was silent.

Does this resonate with any other cat owners?

@violetbunny

One of ours went missing for 2 weeks and while he was gone, his sister was like a different cat. You could tell she was like, "Hooray, now it's all about ME!". So affectionate and happy.

When we eventually found her brother, upon bringing him home she hissed at him and slapped him in the face 😂😐

Amazing!!

Our cat died in February and we still have her brother. There was this weird thing when they were both alive, where he would go out and hunt and bring back something for her.... he'd arrive and make this weird low mew and she would KNOW that meant food or a treat and come running 🏃‍♀️ he would sit there all proud watching her eat it and we'd all be disgusted!!

Since she's gone, he'll hunt and make that noise and me or DH have to come out and make a big fuss of him while trying not to vomit at the sight of a dead bird or mouse 🤢 The worst part of it is he just loves the attention .... animals are so clever to 😩

This is so interesting!

Very similar story with us. We had two cats from the same litter who we got at the same time. The boy cat was very much the house cat and was in all the time, whereas the girl cat was outdoors much more to the point we’d barely see her in the summer. Sadly our boy cat died this summer. Within two days the girl had taken to barely leaving the house and was far more sociable with us and seemed much happier. She’s now pretty much in permanently. It’s an upside to losing our boy cat, but like others have said it has made me feel a bit guilty that she may not have been happy for years - we always thought she was just more of an independent sort.

I rehomed mine as an ex breeding queen, apparently she fought terribly with the other females.

She's now loving life as an spoilt only and I'd never get another as much as I might want to, I have a responsibility to give her a good life with us and she was here first!

Cats are highly territorial and natural loners (except lions). I think they'd probably rather not have to deal with any other cats if given the choice but I'm sure some of them make the best of it.

We had a brother/sister pair and by age 3 they tolerated each other at best / the brother even moved out a few times. After he died the sister was ecstatic. Never left the house again and was the happiest cat ever until she died.

Just got a single kitten. People keep telling me I am cruel that we didn't get two. That she has no one to cuddle and play with and I have been doubting myself but reading this tonight has reassured me. She will remain an only.

I have 4 cats, 2 are mine a boy and a girl from same litter and my son also.has a boy and a girl cat. All neutered. I am home all day. Each cat can come in and go out as they choose through cat flap. We have 4 baskets one in kitchen, one in dining room, one on lounge and one in the hall. All cats are very affectionate with me. They all come up on my lap for affection every day. We have a very large garden with lots of trees and in one section we let grass grow long for them to stalk in. They all love this. They all have their own food bowls and have 1 large tin of good early morning, one at lunch and one before i.go to.bed. They share cat crunchies and cat milk. There is always water but they never drink it. One of the female cats hangs back at good times so I feed her a couple of meters away from other three. We have 2 large indoor climbers and they share those. They seem to get along well. The two boys hang out together and groom each other. The two females spend a bit more time alone. None of them are overly vocal but they all purr a lot when they come up to sit with me. 2 cats often go up to my son's room when he is home from work. One of his and one of mine. One of his cats thinks he is mine as often cuddles up with me in evenings. Even though.their beds are in different rooms often 2 cats will be in one bed together. Often the 2 boys.

Our cat died in February and we still have her brother. There was this weird thing when they were both alive, where he would go out and hunt and bring back something for her.... he'd arrive and make this weird low mew and she would KNOW that meant food or a treat and come running 🏃‍♀️ he would sit there all proud watching her eat it and we'd all be disgusted!!

Since she's gone, he'll hunt and make that noise and me or DH have to come out and make a big fuss of him while trying not to vomit at the sight of a dead bird or mouse 🤢 The worst part of it is he just loves the attention .... animals are so clever to 😩

NotmyfirstRodeomyfriend, your cat's weird meow noise reminds me of when Jumps brings back a 'present'. He carries it in to me, meowing proudly while the prey is in his mouth, sounds sort of like a muffled meow. My reaction always disappoints him .

@JudyGemstone

I rehomed mine as an ex breeding queen, apparently she fought terribly with the other females.

She's now loving life as an spoilt only and I'd never get another as much as I might want to, I have a responsibility to give her a good life with us and she was here first!

Cats are highly territorial and natural loners (except lions). I think they'd probably rather not have to deal with any other cats if given the choice but I'm sure some of them make the best of it.

I am so pleased for her, Judy, ruling the roost at last!

@gaslitstool

We had a brother/sister pair and by age 3 they tolerated each other at best / the brother even moved out a few times. After he died the sister was ecstatic. Never left the house again and was the happiest cat ever until she died.

Just got a single kitten. People keep telling me I am cruel that we didn't get two. That she has no one to cuddle and play with and I have been doubting myself but reading this tonight has reassured me. She will remain an only.

gaslitool, I might have done the same and suggested getting more than one cat, but I agree, after reading this thread I will just keep a single cat.

@caringcarer

I have 4 cats, 2 are mine a boy and a girl from same litter and my son also.has a boy and a girl cat. All neutered. I am home all day. Each cat can come in and go out as they choose through cat flap. We have 4 baskets one in kitchen, one in dining room, one on lounge and one in the hall. All cats are very affectionate with me. They all come up on my lap for affection every day. We have a very large garden with lots of trees and in one section we let grass grow long for them to stalk in. They all love this. They all have their own food bowls and have 1 large tin of good early morning, one at lunch and one before i.go to.bed. They share cat crunchies and cat milk. There is always water but they never drink it. One of the female cats hangs back at good times so I feed her a couple of meters away from other three. We have 2 large indoor climbers and they share those. They seem to get along well. The two boys hang out together and groom each other. The two females spend a bit more time alone. None of them are overly vocal but they all purr a lot when they come up to sit with me. 2 cats often go up to my son's room when he is home from work. One of his and one of mine. One of his cats thinks he is mine as often cuddles up with me in evenings. Even though.their beds are in different rooms often 2 cats will be in one bed together. Often the 2 boys.

That's interesting caregiver, and its great that they all get on. I think what this thread has taught me is that you just never know (when you bring a cat or cats into a home) how they are going to get on and whether they'll just tolerate each other or enjoy the company of other cats.

Sorry about your cat, @OscarRip

I did some reading around this issue as we have jist rehomed 2 girl kittens. I would have taken 1 but partner said 2 and they both needed a home.

Coming together definitely reduced the stress on them and they settled immediately compared to their brothers and sisters. They play together for hours - far longer than we would be able to if there was just 1. I watch the play to make sure we don't have one cat dominating all the time....so far we don't.

They eat together and share litter trays (we have more than 1 but they both happily use both).

But, I also reasoned our house is big enough that if they prefer their own space they can keep out of each others way and sleep separately.

I will watch their growing relationship with interest.

@Mumdiva99

Sorry about your cat, *@OscarRip*

I did some reading around this issue as we have jist rehomed 2 girl kittens. I would have taken 1 but partner said 2 and they both needed a home.

Coming together definitely reduced the stress on them and they settled immediately compared to their brothers and sisters. They play together for hours - far longer than we would be able to if there was just 1. I watch the play to make sure we don't have one cat dominating all the time....so far we don't.

They eat together and share litter trays (we have more than 1 but they both happily use both).

But, I also reasoned our house is big enough that if they prefer their own space they can keep out of each others way and sleep separately.

I will watch their growing relationship with interest.

Thankyou, mum .

If there's one thing this thread has taught me, is that we want to raise happy, fulfilled cats, love and care for them and give them a long and healthy life with us. It is clear we adore our furbabies and do whatever we can to adapt our homes and lives to suit them and their various foibles.

Whether we have one or several cats, we try to find a way to make it work. I've always assumed that two (or more) cats is better than one and it certainly seems to work out like that for some multi cat households.

We just never, ever know how a cat will respond to either being alone or sharing with another cat. Does anyone remember that programme that was repeated recently where a village volunteered to put GPS collars on the local cats to see where they went during a period of a few days? Some cats had cameras, too.

It showed that cats are able to adapt to situations with other cats and work out problems with territory issues. It proved to be a faecinating insight into cat behaviour.

*fascinating

I tried to find that programme after getting the cats as they started with kittens. But all I found was a dreadful home made programme on some channel.

I remember that programme. It was very good. Their conclusion was that it all boiled down to space - where there is plenty of it, cats can coexist happily. Where there are too many cats in too small a space, cats become stressed and aggressive. It makes sense.

Yet, we have a huge house and half an acre of land, with no other cats nearby (total dog village). Our cat still hated her sister and was repressed, not revealing her true personality until her sister died. It wasn’t even like her sister was aggressive or dominant - she was playful and really wanted to curl up with and be friends with grumpy cat. But grumpy cat was having none of it, and just wanted to be alone. It was definitely a personality thing here - an extrovert cat and an introvert cat!

When one of our animals die we show the body to the other animal(s). They understand instantly and never look for them.

I understand that this is not always possible for most but we live on a farm and the vet comes to us.

Omg yes!!

I could’ve written your post. Two brothers, 14 years old. Sadly we had to have one (David) PTS due to a huge, inoperable tumor. He was the noisy one.
I’ve never heard such a loud meow! The other was silent all his life.

Since his brothers death Gareth has found his voice. I think he relied on David to be the one to shout for food, shout for them to be let in and out and now he has to do it himself.

Now I'm wondering who's the dominant one with our sibs (m/f) - they have each now gone missing for a bit. When boy went missing, girl just didn't seem to notice or care. When girl went missing, boy stayed in allday, following me around much more than usual, slept on the bed with me etc.

I had assumed that being bigger, more vocal, and the one that instigates the play fights, that he was the dominant, one, but perhaps not, maybe girl is the silent power holder.....

@TreestumpsAndTrampolines my silent one was the dominant one. He looks the cutest - all fluffy and huge eyes but he’s a bugger to other cats.

The loud one looked bigger, stronger, tougher round the edges but he was the soppy one and deferred to his brother.

I remember that programme. It was very good. Their conclusion was that it all boiled down to space - where there is plenty of it, cats can coexist happily. Where there are too many cats in too small a space, cats become stressed and aggressive. It makes sense

What is a “small space” may depend on the cat.

Bengals, for example, need huge roaming territories and as few cats around as possible. The fact that people tend to insist they are house cats because of their desirability and expense is at odds with their nature and a big reason there are so many on rehoming sites. Often from multicat households.

Other cats may be fine with a room or a shelf that is “theirs” to retreat to.

Thing is you have no idea how stressed a cat is most of the time until circs change and you realise it was unhappy.

Personally I think if a cat needs company, most of the time a dog is a better choice than another cat.

This is really interesting as all I keep reading is that cats should be in pairs.

We have one at the moment, and won't get another while he's around. But I have said in future I'd adopt a pair –ours gets very lonely when we're away (a sitter pops in but he's clingy when we get home, although perhaps I'm anthropomorphising!). This has given me pause (paws ) for thought.

Our last cat Bob was the strong silent type. We took in a foundling for a few weeks who was a loud and frequent miaower. When he left, Bob became a miaower, too! Was strange, because he was 10 years old and had never miaowed in his life.

Maybe I’m delusional but I feel my Burmese brothers love each other. They’re 7 now and the breeder said they were unusually close as kittens. They sleep together, groom, seek each other out and are mostly polite and good natured. They go outside together and often come back at the same time. Occasionally they have a scrap but mostly nothing too bad. I do think there is more scent marking and scratching in the house than if we had a single cat though.

We have two. We only intended to get one as I was sure cats prefer to be on their own, but we got Cat number 1 home and he was just so distressed. It was weird as he was super confident with people, we brought him in and put the carry box in a quiet place and left him to make his own way out and explore in his own time, but he just marched out immediately and a couple of hours later he was asleep on my husband's knee with all four legs stuck up in the air. But by evening he looked like he was ready to go home, he kept sniffing around and crying, he couldn't settle anywhere. We thought he needed time so gave him a good few weeks but he was obviously unhappy at home, even though he loved attention from both of us from the start. Eventually we discussed it with the rescue and decided that, as he'd come from a foster home with a lot of cats in it, he was probably feeling vulnerable on his own. Luckily they had another kitten in another foster home linked to the same rescue group, which was the last one of his litter, his mother was fed up with him and kept chasing him away, and he was not coping too well with being an only kitten in a house full of older cats. We went to meet him and brought him home the same day and Cat 1 apparently fell in love with him on sight.

They're now both 3, both neutered, and spend almost every minute of every day together. They both have their own personal spots that the other one will never touch, but they also have spots they're happy to share. They each have a box in the cat tree, Cat 1 will never go in Cat 2's box, and vice versa, but if one goes for a nap in the cat tree, the other will also go for a nap in the cat tree. They sleep practically on top of each other every night, mirror one another's movements, sit slow blinking at each other across the room. They go from room to room together, and we had to buy a large dog feeding bowl for them to share as they kept trying to share the two separate cat bowls and bumping heads. They do play fight, but they seem to take turns to win, and then 5 minutes later they're fast asleep with their faces buried in each other's bums (lovely)

It's interesting about the vocalisations. Ours are vocal in different ways. Cat 1 will just SHOUT if he wants something. If he's excited he won't say anything. Cat 2 does all the chirruping, and will have a mad 5 minutes where he runs all around the house at top speed, chirruping as loud as he can (he also makes weird little purry chirrups like a mobile phone vibrating when he's sleepy and contented!), but he won't shout for attention much.

My cat Labatz died a few months ago. Ever since, Larouche (they used to get on pretty well though Labatz did hoard the attention) --has developed the habit of meowing far too much. I'm at a loss and thinking of taking him to the vet even if it might be an expensive consultation for not much. I understand he might be sensitive and needy and I doubled his food and cuddle time but it's become a real bother especially when he wakes me up early in the morning or miaows incessantly while i'm trying to work. I thought to post on this thread though i'm really not sure if it's related to grief given it's been 3 and a half months....

I had two cats, one the dominant cat, very maternal towards the younger more vocal one. When the younger one was hit by a car, my older cat became very vocal while previously she had been quiet.