Hi everyone, I wonder if anyone has any advice for getting over bullying when you were younger.
My bullying happened at university. I don't know how common that is. I went to a very prestigious university and everyone in my family was so happy I got in. I think I was very naive when I went, but basically it was the most unpleasant place I have ever been. It was incredibly snobby. I went to a state school in the midlands, and most of the people I was in halls with went to boarding schools. I had had friends from private school before going to university so it never occurred to me that it would be an issue, but unfortunately it was. Most of the social scene was invite only, lots of societies were invite only with horrible initiations that involved girls not wearing very much, boys eating horrible foods etc.
I made a huge effort - maybe too much. I think I tried out for most sports teams going in a bid to make friends. I had enjoyed drama at school and I auditioned for over thirty student plays. Didn't get a single part. Maybe I'm just not very good at drama after all, but I just couldn't help but feel that all these doors were closed to me. I tried out for the student newspaper, again didn't get a single position. I ended up having a few 'friends' at university who weren't particularly nice to me. I was definitely not in the cool gang so they made me feel like they were doing me a favour.
The thing is that, sadly, it was the worst three years of my life. I am now in my mid thirties, and lots of things have gone well for me. I have a job I enjoy and have been promoted a few times, I have a child and a nice husband. I have lots to be happy about. However I just can't get over what happened at university. I have never felt so miserable or unhappy. I developed an eating disorder that has never really gone away fully. I felt like such a failure, despite in the end getting a 2.1, but I genuinely left university thinking something was wrong with me and sometimes I still have that feeling.