How did you get your toddler to go to sleep by themself

[Siablue]

My two year old still breastfeeds or cuddles to sleep every night anx it can take him a hour to go to sleep. It doesn’t work for me anymore and I am struggling.

We used to co- sleep but I moved him into a bed. I am a single mum so can’t get anyone else to do bedtime for me (which I know can help some toddlers move on from breastfeeding).

See if you can find on catchup jo frost back to bed method it takes 3 night but if you stick to it by the letter it does work. Bath and story/milk then tuck into bed no more milk till morning. Won’t be easy and lots of crying but most parents are surprised by how quicky it takes for them to drop off if you stick to the method

You can only do that by force.

It's natural.

I won't cause my child upset by forcing unnatural sleep habits on them.

The move from cot to bed was very difficult for my toddler. We did bath, story, bedtime and then the first time friendly, time to sleep. Then no eye contact and keep putting them back to bed. I stopped counting at 60 times the first night. It took about 3/4 nights of doing this consistently and now they sleep fine. Good luck OP!

Once mine stopped going to sleep easily being fed or cuddled I’d feed/cuddle then put in their cot. If they cried/complained I’d cuddle again but tell them it was bedtime and put them back down. They all (bar one) started to do this a lot younger than your child though so it may not work so well with an older toddler. I think mine were being kept awake by me being there because they all started going to sleep within minutes of me putting them to bed.

I think like anything else it’s largely down to the child but also your own tolerance levels. I was quite happy to cuddle mine to sleep while they were actually going to sleep but as soon as they started messing about I got frustrated, decided the cuddling was no longer working and tried something else.

Thank you. I will have a look at Jo Frost. I don’t want to do anything cruel but I feel that our bedtime routine isn’t working anymore and it takes him so long to get to sleep.

I also do want to stop breastfeeding. I would prefer to do this gradually but at the moment I can’t see how I would stop as he feeds so much at night time.

At his age I dont think gradually will work. I think if your ready you need to go cold turkey Could you leave him with his dad for a weekend or at least a full day then just say boob all gone It will be upsetting but he will soon get the message and give up must you must not give in or it will be very confusing for him. At his age breast milk has no nutritional value so it’s purely for comfort I think the bedtime and the feeding can be solved quite quickly but it all depends on how strong you can be to see it through he can’t change it on his own he needs you to show him. Good luck

I can’t leave him with his Dad. I have to do it all myself which means a lot of the usual advice is out.

I have been doing some reading and I might try the Dr Jay Gordon method or gradually night weaning has anyone done this? www.drjaygordon.com/blog-detail/sleep-changing-patterns-in-the-family-bed