Say something to make me less worried about Menopause

[MunchBunchYoghurt]

I’ve always worried about the menopause having never heard anything post about it.
But knew it was still a long time off.

Well! Not anymore! As at the age of 35 I have to have a total hysterectomy so I will soon be going through it.

I’ve read about all the horrible issues you have to contend with- but can someone who has gone through it tell me anything that will make me feel less worried about it?

I’m aware there is HRT but from what I’ve heard there is a shortage? And it’s expensive (not free on NHS)

Dreading it....

I had my ovaries removed a couple of years ago when I was 39. I was terrified of being plunged into surgical menopause and all of the awful symptoms I'd heard about. I was mainly worried about my mental health suffering.
...however, I can honestly say that I have been absolutely fine and not had a single symptom. In fact I'm feel better for not having my hormones fluctuating all the time. I was put on HRT a couple of weeks after surgery and it seems to have keep my hormone levels stable and no ill effects.
I wonder whether by having surgery and therefore an artificial menopause all at once which can be dealt with, we are quite lucky to miss out on the symptoms that many women experience for years without being able to do much about them.
Good luck and please don't worry - perhaps talk to your doctor about HRT before your surgery to put your mind at rest?
As you are only 35, it is important that you have HRT as it protects your bones against osteoporosis. You will have no problem getting it.

Thank you @HollyHocks13
That’s the kind of positive story I need to read!
I’m glad your experience has gone well.
And maybe you’re right- that entering into it early and when you know it’s going to happen may be better than it happening naturally and unexpectedly!

I am in peri menopause and it was crap until I got on HRT. I am early forties and it has helped so much for me. As you are so young it is really important that you have HRT. Don't give up if the first one you try doesn't work, it can take a while to get one that works for you. Also stay on one for at least 3 months. The first month I had some bad side effects but by 8 weeks they had passed. And now it is life changing to how I was. I had complete insomnia. I was getting 2 hours a night and then being shattered all day. HRT has changed that completely.

I had a “natural” menopause in my early 50s and really it was fine. My symptoms were hot flushes - which were odd but really not that bad - and a run of cystitis from vaginal atrophy (oh the glamour, oh the sexynesss) both of which stopped the minute I went on HRT. So basically it was fine.

The best thing I can say about menopause is HRT . Don't be afraid of it .

HRT saved my life

I needed to read this. I will be having total hysterectomy next Monday. I am not 40 yet but very close. I am dreading it. From what I spoke with my surgeon, HRT is a must for my bones and heart. I also worry about availability, about induced menopause, about my mental health (not in the best of shapes anyway), about how I will be as a woman, how my relationship will be...the list goes on. Sorry OP I have no words of advice just to say you are not alone. When is your surgery?

@Vicliz24

The best thing I can say about menopause is HRT . Don't be afraid of it .

This, I had a total hysterectomy and thought I would deal with the symptoms naturally. After around a year of sleepless night due to night sweats, I started on HRT.

I have been using HRT for 14 years, now using patches as the risk from DVT is lower and I (usually) do three long haul flights a year. I wish I had used HRT from the day after surgery as my Specialist recommended.

Good Luck with your surgery.

@Cappucinoextrachocolate those all or all my worries too!!
Good luck for your surgery.

Mine isn’t booked yet, I have my meeting with the Dr next week to find out what’s happening etc.
But it’s cervical cancer related so I don’t think I’ll have to wait long.

I’ll definitely be asking about HRT then.

What are the rumoured shortages of HRT for? Is it lockdown related?

Thanks for the positive comments everyone

Old fashioned resources say it's not menop that is challenging but rather it's peri-menop ("the change"). Which is the run up to menop & the old-fashioned view was that peri lasted 1-2 yrs.

On MN, peri seems to start about age 40 or maybe younger, & never end unless someone takes HRT (for life).

I can't contribute because I'm 53 & still haven't hit peri. Most women I know IRL have had 1-2 yrs which they found tough (exhausted, scatty, unsettled bodies) at about age 50-52 & then they got better. I don't know how many took HRT to get better & who didn't.

I don’t know about the effects of suddenly being plunged into menopause at your age. You should get HRT on the NHS, and as it’s cancer related you should also get a prescription charge exemption, meaning you don’t pay for any prescriptions. I went through a natural menopause and wasn’t able to take HRT. I was fine. A few hot sweats at night, but nothing during the day, and nowhere near every night either. It lasted a few months, then no symptoms at all.

Those worries about shortages. These seem to have eased now. I was put on a patch that last year you couldn't get for love nor money on the nhs or private, and I know people were travelling abroad to get them.

Since I started over the summer I have had no shortages whatsoever and been able to get my patch within 2 days (I alway put my repeat in 2 weeks before its needed so I know I have them).

Please don't let the shortages which are beginning to ease put you off HRT.

No real advice as just heading to menopause now - mid fifties - no symptoms yet , however just wanted to wish you the best of luck with your surgery OP

I am 58 and started having irregular periods when I was about 54. Then they stopped after about two years. And that's it. I have had a bit of hair loss but only my hairdresser noticed; I do find I leak a bit if I don't get to the loo in good time, but other than that nothing - no hot flushes, no brain fog, no memory issues, no mood swings.
About half my friends had issues, some severe, but the rest had minimal problems.

Thank you @daisypond I didn’t know there was such thing as an exemption- I’ll ask about that.

Thank you @babbi

And thanks every who has replied so far. Already I feel less stressed about the idea. Mumsnet wins for this kind of thing, thank you so much.

I had a baby at 41 and then pretty much went into peri straight away. Had a turbulent few years with my older teens and realised at some point I’d not had a period for a couple of years. Had some stressful moments but really not that bad and nothing that couldn’t be (and in fact was) attributed to home life in general. Now use topical HRT and feel a lot more human generally. Take all the help you can get and it will get better.

Mine was about 4 years start to finish and obviously yours will have a much bigger shock factor because it will be overnight but tell people if you’re struggling.

The joy of not looking at the calendar before booking holidays or making social arrangements is a wonderful thing.

No worrying about where the loos are and if you'll be able to change easily. No leaks.

No period pain, no sore boobs once a month.

It isn't terrible for everyone.

I'm nearly sixty and, apart from periods stopping, haven't had a single symptom. I know this makes me very very lucky, but my bf is older than me and has passed through meno without symptoms, so it does happen!

Thanks ladies.

Ooooh the stuff you have to look forward to when you’re a woman. Men definitely have it easier

Time to embrace a new-found fondness for cardigans, and also to let loose your inner Grumpy Old Woman. It's quite liberating!