Small children - early morning chaos.

[ImFree2doasiwant]

I'm single, and have 2 dc aged 3 and 5. I can count on one hand the number of nights they've stayed over elsewhere.

I'm really starting to struggle with the mornings. Every morning I am woken up by one or both, I never get to wake up naturally. One will often cone in in the night and cuddle up and go back to sleep, that doesn't bother me. It's once they are both awake they are immediately on the go. They are noisy and active straight away and honestly it's starting to drive me mad.

I have tried so many different ways of dealing with it, and nothing seems to work. I end up shouting, and then they're upset.

I've tried setting an alarm so I can get up half an hour earlier and get a cup of tea and wake up properly in peace, but cant get as far as downstairs without one if them waking up.

If I wake up earlier than them, the sane thing happens, it's as if as soon as I move they wake up.

I don't expect them to lay in, it's just the noise and activity that is an assault on my senses.

Anyone found a way of dealing with this? Either with how to cope better with it, or how to get them to calm the fuck down.

Side note - the behaviour isn't terrible, they're just playing,it's just my inability to have so much business so early.

They’re verging on the age where they could watch TV for half an hour whilst you wake up. Mine are 7 and 4 and on weekend days are allowed up at 7 (before then read in their rooms) and will wake me or DH at 8. I feed them (DS1 can help himself to fruit or get them both a drink) and then I get myself up.

This is a part of parenting I really struggle with. The requirement to be instantly 'on' before you even open your eyes, every single day.
I encourage the kids to sort themselves out as much as possible in the morning whilst I drink a huge mug of tea and come to. Sometimes that involves too much tv - needs must!

Get gro clock for both set for 7. Say they have to play quietly in their rooms/watch tablets until the light changes and then they are allowed to come in to you with a story book to read. If they come before this then or too boisterous just take them back, and repeat. Be really firm in your expectations of them.

Telly?

I have a gro clock for my toddler which sometimes work. He ignores it but it gives a visual indicator of 'TOO EARLY' when I send him back to their own rooms and he does then play quietly until wake up time.

Otherwise, tv is your friend.

I hate this too, and I only have one to deal with! It is so hard waking up when you have no energy and they are full on 100%, I normally try and get my daughter to lay in bed and watch my phone for a bit while I wake up, doesn't work so well on the school mornings though. I just hate getting up to be honest and can't wait until she's a teenager who wants to sleep in all day, that is the part I am looking forward to the most

*his own room

Try white noise, so that the sound of you going downstairs doesn’t wake them up.
Have you tried a gro clock? It helps children who are too young to read an ordinary clock to understand when it's time to get up. This method only works if there are consequences for ignoring the gro clock and getting up earlier.
Make an early morning busy box with things for them to do quietly and independently in bed or on the bedroom floor until a certain time.

Screens

A television in your bedroom set to something boring. They sit on end of your bed watching it whilst you dose on.
Ours was an hour of open university maths just before Sesame Street at 6am.

Do you have blackout liners?

Definitely try a gro clock. It's worked with my two year old. Just take them back each time they come out of their room until it's 'morning'. They can play in their room/read/tablet or whatever you decide until the clock lights up. You might have to put in a work for a short while but it's worth it in the long run.

We have a gro clock. The 5 yr old will generally stay in bed til it changes at 6.45, but then catapults himself into my room. He can read the time on it, so knows what time it is (and comes and tells me...). If I set it later for a weekend he comes in "mummy it's 6.45 and the clock hasn't changed....."

I think the issue is that there's 2 of them.

Could you adjust their bedtimes slightly later so they don’t wake so early?

I have this problem and only have one (but due to have another!) I still haven’t got used to it.

Sorry cross post.

Ours is set for the same time each day so it's not confusing. Maybe make it 7am every day? I know it's early but it's not 5am (which is when mine used to get up for the day!).

I was also going to suggest a gro clock.

The night before - when they’re asleep so they don’t see - you could lay out on a table (in another room!) different fun and quiet activities for them to do - colouring, play dough, Lego, a puzzle, something they like that they’d do quietly together. Maybe put out a packet of plain oat cakes that they can snack on if they get hungry so they don’t wake you for that. Then say they can come into you at a certain time after playing with that first?

My youngest is getting slightly better at playing solo when he wakes (an early riser and a cheery morning person - I am neither!!) and I have tried this to some success, it depends on how quickly he wants someone to play with!

We have blackout blinds. It's pitch black in there!

Breakfast in front of the tv buys time for you to pull yourself together on the sofa. My youngest is like a cross between the Tasmanian Devil off the bugs bunny cartoons and the Duracell bunny (has asd), so I feel your pain. I’ve managed to instigate the rule of no noisy play, jumping about, etc until I have finished my morning coffee - I have a seriously large cup, make it piping hot so it takes a while to drink 😉
Gro clocks really don’t work for DS2 (just likes to announce how many stars there are and what numbers he can see at top volume 🙄), plus when the mornings get darker for longer he can’t seem to cope with the clock telling him it’s morning while it’s still dark out, or in summer the clock says it’s bedtime and the suns still up.

(I should add that it’s the novelty that makes my suggestion work with my youngest - who is a very loud energetic child. Changing it up to a new “surprise” quiet thing to do makes him want to play with it and keep quiet while he does so he gets a new “surprise” the next day. I don’t buy new stuff, I should add, I just rotate things we have and get out things that don’t come out much, if that makes sense!)

I don't sleep well, otherwise would probably cope better. It's true, 7am ISNT early, but it is on the back of bad sleep for 2 years and about 5child free mornings since they were born.

I used to take pots of dry cereal and bottles of drinks upstairs and leave them outside the dc bedrooms when they were this age. Used to give me an extra few minutes of peace. The older one could get the lids of For her siblings and They’d have a little picnic in one of the bedrooms and sometimes then get distracted in to playing together for a bit.

You set the time yourself on the gro clock so you can always set it wrong... it can say 6.45 but actually be 7.15!

Also let them go downstairs and watch TV ahead of u, my 2 are the same age and they come in and say good morning then toddle down the stairs by themselves for half an hour.

I'm another saying telly! Or YouTube kids with the sound off on your phone while you doze. They can't change app if you put guided access on. But they're nearly old enough to get themselves a bowl of dry Cheerios or a croissant and watch telly themselves anyway.