Sad and angry

[Hopeitsallok]

Feeling sad and pissed off. Ds(13) came home from school and told me that he had a disagreement with another kid over something trivial and this boy said to him ‘shut it or I’ll slaughter your family’ Now obviously these are only words and this other boy is trying to be a wee smart arse but it just pisses me off. Ds is a great kid who is really kind and works hard at school and never gives me any cause for concern. Because he does well at school this obviously opens him up to abuse and insults on a regular basis; it’s not the done thing to do well and show an interest in learning.
I know this is nothing new and it was the same story when I was at school, but it makes me so fucking mad!!!! He says it doesn’t bother him all the time, just occasionally but why should he have to put up with this shit when he’s just keeping his head down and trying to do his best - I know there’s no answer to this I just had to vent. ☹️

That's really nasty. Poor ds. I would speak to school if this becomes an ongoing issue. The boy is probably doing it to others too.

It's a good opportunity to learn that there are people in this world that get a kick out of hurting others and to not let them knock his confidence. It's good that he talk to you about it so you can support him.

Thanks tweetus- he’s not that bothered and he did stand up for himself which I’m proud of us but it just really bothered me today. He’s going to encounter this kind of shit from people, that’s just life, but when there’s so much emphasis on being kind and looking out for others it still really gets to me that kids can be so cruel and bloody nasty. I sometimes feel that being a nice, decent person doesn’t get you anywhere

I sympathise. My daughter got invited to 'just go kill yourself' on the classroom chat. If they learn to deal with it appropriately, and it sounds like your son has, it's very empowering for them. And yes, there's going to be arseholes like this throughout life, and every time you deal with them effectively and appropriately, it makes you stronger, with more tools in your toolbox for dealing with them next time. . .

Mbosnz that’s awful, I really hope your daughter is ok and karma gets the wee fuckers who said that 😡 You’re right and my dh says he encountered same shit at school all those years ago, the only difference is my ds tells me EVERY detail of his day (which is no bad thing) whereas years ago we would probably not have told our parents all the crap we dealt with/listened to.

Oh it’s shit isn’t it? My DS is 12 and been a target for similar but he doesn’t open up much. When he does share things he seems to be handling it with some maturity but I do wonder sometimes. Oh some kids are fucking awful.

Professorinkling 😥

Another view- it can be an opportunity to 'encourage' your DC to do well enough at school that they don't need to encounter morons like described on here, going forwards.

I have a good friend, who due to several factors; some external, many 'self-inflicted' who, in her late 50s, is still dealing with stuff I walked away from at 28-30, tops.

I hear the 'learn to deal with it/it's life' a lot, on here. But it really isn't. School is one of the few places that you get no choice regarding who is also there with you.

Beyond school, you get choices.
Make sure your DC can exercise their choices so they don't have to work alongside anyone who'd dream of saying that, for fear of a Disciplinary, tomorrow.

Yes, yes, I know 'it's not that simple'- but sometimes it is.

Of course, in an ideal world, I'd like that person sat down by the Head, parents present, asking him to describe what he meant by 'slaughter her family'.

But sadly, I suspect the parent/s would look blank as he denied it.