Menopause or just losing my mind?

[EsterOdesavitch]

I really enjoy my job, I'm quite career oriented and ambitious and like to be the best I can be in my role - I like to be the go-to person for difficult stuff, the person who can be trusted to work out issues with clients etc. I'm also fairly academic and have a couple of professional qualifications. I've been in my profession for 20 years.

But I'm 48, became pre-menopausal last year and now on full HRT for the mood swings, leaky bladder, sweats and flushes - and now, I couldn't give much of a shit about anything.

In the mornings I can scarcely rouse myself to walk the dog, let alone get motivated to do a day's remote work. The thought of interacting with clients makes me feel physically sick, and the endless internal meetings and discussions about things make me want to cry with boredom.

I can't concentrate and can't keep my focus on the topic at hand. I'm reading technical papers but nothing is going in. I've got an exam coming up, I'm trying to revise but I'm not absorbing anything. I thought I just hated this job so I've been looking for another one, but during my last interview I was acutely aware that I was having to work really hard not to lose track of what he - or I - was saying. It's like I'm a totally different person, I used to be so...sharp.

I had another GP appt but she didn't have any suggestions other than a new coil (my mirena is 5 months overdue for changing).

Am I going mad, if it's hormones does it get better?

Interesting to read this - it's me. I'm going to need to manage my weight. I love what I do too but literally could not care and am not motivated. Just off to buy vit b, d and k!

I don't work but can relate to your post (and some days feel very glad that I don't work because of the brain fog etc). I used to be very sharp and on the ball so to speak. I am dealing with this and with fairly young children so I'm exhausted in a different way. My patience is limited, I'm easily overwhelmed, irritable and like to moan a lot, libido has disappeared and went through a spell of insomnia/can be prone to early waking. I don't suppose I've helped myself much in the diet department and would benefit from doing more exercise but it feels like it's another should. I take Iron supplements and I'm trying to remember to take other vits too.

Yep being slim didn’t protect me from getting breast cancer either. Now I can’t even take bloody HRT.
Exercise is shown to help mood and with brain fog. I do it for that, not for weight loss.

It’s all so joyless cutting out everything we enjoy. I love wine, coffee... I actually eat well and exercise but this doesn’t seem to be enough. I think I’m peri menopausal. The insomnia is the worst.

I appreciate all the comments. I haven't had terrible insomnia really - certainly there has been nights where I still seem to be wide awake at 3am having not even dozed off, and I'm awake between 3 and 4am most mornings and struggle to go off again, but I haven't found that especially bothersome. DH brings me a cup of tea around 6am and I start trying to motivate myself to walk the dog.

It's the brain fog that troubles me the most. Thanks @Zaphodsotherhead, that's quite inspiring - I have run successfully before, might give it another go. My joints don't hurt, it's the migraines that get in my way!