Was it my fault?

[Drawmelikeoneofyourfrenchgirls]

This is something that happened to me a few years ago now. I don’t know why but in recent months I have been thinking about it more and more. At the time I just tried to block it out and forget about it. I don’t even know why I’ve been thinking about it.
I was on a work trip for a couple of days. There was about 6 of us there. One evening we all went out for dinner and had way too much to drink. We were in a bar and it all get a a bit sketchy. I remember leaving the bar with one of the guys I work with. I don’t remember getting in a taxi, getting back to the hotel or any of that. The next thing I remember is waking up in bed in my hotel room. I was naked and the guy was in bed with me, naked too. I just remember getting really upset and sobbing and he jumped out of bed grabbing his clothes. He kept saying ‘I’m sorry’ and ‘don’t be upset’ he left to go back to his room. I don’t remember a thing honestly not a single thing. It was probably my fault for drinking too much. It happened in a foreign country so I doubt I could have done anything about it without causing major hassle for my job. I don’t even know why I’m posting really or what I’m asking. I guess just putting it in words after blocking it out for so long

It was 100%. Not. Your. Fault. If you are in a state where you are unable to say no. Or if you are blackout/unconscious etc. That's still a no.

@ecxo thank you for reading and replying I appreciate that. I’m not usually a massive drinker so the fact I don’t remember a thing. I don’t know, maybe my brain has just blocked it out. I’ve just been going between feeling angry with myself then angry with him. I wish I could just delete it from my mind

It isn’t your fault and it isn’t his fault, just something that happened (and you don’t know what happened) when you’d had too much to drink. In the nicest possible way, try not to worry about it. Do you still work with him?

@Drawmelikeoneofyourfrenchgirls that might well be what happened. The body has its way of blocking out bad things. It's traumatised. This is in no way your fault. Don't EVER think that. You weren't in a state to give consent and he should've known that regardless of how he responded to you the next day because the damage is done. He still did it. He can be sorry and sorry he should be!