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Original poster

What age did / would you leave DC home alone for a little bit?

50 replies

Hermano · 16/09/2020 15:37

I'm not there yet, DD isn't quite 7, but another thread inspired me to ask.

If eg I had to drop DC2 at nursery, ~8 minute walk each way, what age would you feel comfortable leaving a fairly sensible child home alone? Assuming they know how to use the phone to call me if needed etc.

She can already unlock the front door by herself so no worries if something spontaneously caught fire.

OP posts:

spiderlight · 16/09/2020 16:53

When mine was about 9, I would take the dog onto the field immediately behind our garden for ten minutes or so, knowing that he wouldn't glance up from Minecraft and that he could just come to the back gate and shout if he needed me. We didn't go further afield until the start of Y6 though, when he was going on 11.

Original poster

Hermano · 16/09/2020 16:56

What about using the kettle? A friend has a 13 year old who can make her cups of tea. This sounds like the dream to me, how long have i got to wait for that one?

OP posts:

CatFaceCats · 16/09/2020 17:14

8 and 9 here. I started leaving them at home curbing lockdown when I’d nip to the petrol station for bread/milk etc. I would be gone 10 mins.
Now, they both go to and come home school together, without me.

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frustrationcentral · 16/09/2020 17:27

@Hermano

What about using the kettle? A friend has a 13 year old who can make her cups of tea. This sounds like the dream to me, how long have i got to wait for that one?

My 11 year old can make tea

Aroundtheworldin80moves · 16/09/2020 17:30

Eldest could make a decent cuppa by 8. 7.5yo is learning now, with careful supervision as she is shorter and has tiny hands.

(Tea making is on the Skills badge list for Cubs, who are 8-10.5. Ironing, cooking etc are also on there.)

Impatientwino · 16/09/2020 17:37

I recently left my sensible 8 year old for about 30 minutes. We had a preschool visit 2 minutes down the road and he was excited to be trusted.

He knows he doesn't answer the door to anyone at all. I shut the blinds in the front so no-one could see in. He can make himself cold drinks.

I have a work mobile so left him that and he knows how to ring me if he wanted me.

Roowig2020 · 16/09/2020 17:42

I leave my dc8 for about 5-10 mins if I need to nip to the shop at the end of the street. She is s as kid very good at making tea and coffee she had been doing this for a year or two.

BogRollBOGOF · 16/09/2020 18:18

7 for 5-10 mins. We live very close to the school, and I often end up with DCs on different times and they hated being lugged out umpteen times a day. I'm like a flight attendant going through the emergency exits and protocol

Shortly before lockdown, I asked my fellow volunteer (works in child protection) at a youth group about when they would be prepared to leave DS1 (9) at home for the 90 minute activity. I was pleasantly surprised that they thought he was ready. For context this is less than 300m from home with one side road and two driveways to cross. He has ASD, is very risk adverse and has an incredibly long attention span to sit on a sofa playing Minecraft. He's been well drilled on personal safety through his own and my youth groups. He struggles with the sensory stimulation of the youth group and would be very happy with himself for company at home.
Lockdown and DH now working from home have made this unnecessary for a while and he will probably be 10 first.

None of us drink tea/ coffee so the kettle is mainly used to boil water for pasta. It's incredibly unlikely that they would think to do something like that independently.

You can't know how anyone will behave in an emergency until they are tested, but when a DC has fallen and hurt themself, their brother has been quite practical about seeking help which is a positive start to gauging their mentality (I'm not leaving them together for some time until I'm confident that they won't hit the other for offences committed in Minecraft )

BogRollBOGOF · 16/09/2020 18:19

I hate it when I press instead of

TokyoSushi · 16/09/2020 18:22

DS is 9.5, we leave him for around 20 mins.

CremeEggThief · 16/09/2020 18:23

DS was 8 the first time. I had to go to the gp, a 10 minute walk away, as I'd developed an allergic reaction to antibiotics I was given for tonsillitis. He was off school that day with a bad cold, and rather sensibly, chose to stay at home warm in bed rather than come with me.

LER83 · 16/09/2020 19:31

Over lockdown we started to leave ds 10 and dd 8 for 5-10 minutes if we needed to pop somewhere. Will gradually start building it up for ds as he starts secondary next year and will need to catch a bus! Also need to build him up walking home from school as he is very reluctant to do it! It does make life easier now I only need to drag youngest ds out to the shop!

corythatwas · 16/09/2020 19:37

A friend has a 13 year old who can make her cups of tea. This sounds like the dream to me, how long have i got to wait for that one?

You could start by teaching her to bake, that doesn't involve boiling water so is safer. (She can wear oven gloves when taking the tin out of the oven). 6 or 7 sounds fine for that. Then the full tea tray at 8 or 9- they just need to be strong enough not to wobble with the kettle. Sit back and be waited on.

RedCatBlueCat · 16/09/2020 19:47

Boil the kettle to make me a cup of tea- about 10, but he's tiny, and couldnt reach before then.
Boil a kettle in the house on his own? Not for a while yet.

Helloyouthere · 16/09/2020 21:42

I've been leaving my 9year old, y5 this week for the first time for the school run. His school bubble is closed due to a confirmed case so he can't come with us, he has to isolate. His brother still needs to go to school. School run takes max. 20mins. He's been fine, he loves it. I lock the front door, he could unlock the back door in an emergency.

TinaTraybake · 16/09/2020 22:41

I think it really depends on the child. When I first left mine alone I left my eldest 2 together, they were 11 and 10 and surprisingly didn't kill each other whilst I was gone for half an hour. 😁

Pertella · 16/09/2020 22:51

I leave DS 7 to go to the corner shop. He's usually on his tablet and still sitting in the same spot when I get back

He can call my mobile through Alexa so can get hold of me if he needs to

Jessicabrassica · 25/09/2020 05:31

Think we got to tea at about 6 or 7. Dd at 9 could make a great but slightly heavy handed g+t. When I was writing up my research when she was 9 she'd often appear in the doorway mud afternoon to see whether I'd prefer tea or gin at that particular time!

timeforanew · 25/09/2020 05:41

My 7 year old stays home alone for up to 30 minutes. he’s sensible, and live mid terrace - there’s always people at home on at least one side!

hopefulhalf · 25/09/2020 06:05

8 or very close to.
Start small and work up.

Ratatcat · 25/09/2020 06:55

My 4yo has been asking to walk home alone or stay at home while I take her sister to nursery. It is very easy to say no at this age and she’ll be pestering me for quite a few years before I say yes. 8-9 feels about right to me. I’m conscious that by 11 lots of children are catching trains independently for school and a gradual build up of independence feels sensible.

sunshineandshowers40 · 25/09/2020 07:02

I think Covid has changed things a little bit. I leave my 10 and 11 year old but have left my 7 year old for 10 mins with siblings to get bread and milk.

AlwaysLatte · 25/09/2020 07:20

When the oldest was about 10. Now that they're 12 and 10 we've left them for up to 2 hours but only when we're very local and can get back fast if need be.

Heatherjayne1972 · 25/09/2020 07:32

10 ish. But only after strict instruction not to answer the door and only for 1 hour max
Depends on the child really.

wendz86 · 25/09/2020 07:35

I’ve left 9 year old to take 5 year old down our street for scooter rides and things . I think when she is 10 I will start leaving her for a quick shop trip or to drop her sister somewhere .

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