How to deal with clingy toddler? It's been a hard few days

[HKmummymoo]

My 20 month old has always been clingy but at the moment it's breaking me. Today he screamed the house down when I tried to put him down so I could dish out dinner from the oven.
I normally try anything before I have to let him go but I can't risk him getting burned when I'm doing dinner!

I feel guilt ridden as he gets so distressed.

Also he's going through a stage where he won't let go of something he shouldn't have and I ended up having to rip it out his hands which makes me feel awful!

What's the answer? I feel like a crap mum at the moment and I'm beating myself up daily!

Anyone? ☹️

I have no advice but sending you a hug and hopefully a bump

Distraction? Giving him a job - either helping you or getting teddy in a seat or something? Bribery (sorry, I had 3 so standards slipped by the 3rd!) Or if it’s a particular bad patch - probably sickening for something.

I’d be driven to edge with one of mine and wonder what was wrong and then they’d be ill in the next couple of days.

Hope you’ve got someone to peel him off from time to time. And one day he will be a teen and barely glance at you and you’ll feel a bit sad (just a tiny bit of stupid nostalgic sad) that you aren’t the centre of their life.

I sympathise OP. My 2.5 year old is incredibly clingy - he is more so when he's tired. If he goes somewhere with his dad, or I go elsewhere in the house, he will stand at the stair gate and have a really sad voice and face and call for me. He'll stand next to me and want to be picked up and cuddled, a lot of the time during dinner prep.
To deal with the dinner prep issue for you, can you get him engaged with something to distract him? On really clingy days for DS, I will put the TV on for him while I get the dinner ready and on the table.
We're not usually a screen time family, but it works as its a treat for him and engages him enough for me to put the dinner ready safely.
The rest of the time during the day, I don't ration cuddles - if he asks, he gets them. I give the DC as much of my attention as possible, in the hope that they will grow up secure in my love for them.
Re the dangerous thing he had... You were keeping him safe. Well done mama. Don't feel guilty about it. I understand it's hard not to, but you're doing the best thing for him. Can you keep the thing somewhere he can't get to it?
You sound exhausted, can you get some rest to recharge? Can anyone else take over for a bit?

No tips. It's bloody hard work.

Oh, and know that it is hard. It's okay that it feels really hard going. This stage will end. In the immediate, can you sit him in his highchair next to you while you do the dishing up of dinner? Sing with him? Give him crayons? Buy some slightly fancier crayons that are a treat and only come out at the time of day you need him not to be clinging?
I do understand I felt exactly the same as you, especially when toddler was clinging/climbing on me while trying to breastfeed the baby. It made me feel really touched out. But, it's normal.