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Ex husband wants to take me to court

2 replies

Hobnob79 · 14/09/2020 14:39

Hi all..my ex husband wants to take me to court because I won’t agree to him changing the hours he sees our child.
When we split up 7 years ago he wanted to see her every sat and sun, then he changed it to every sat and sun and a random night in the week..(which he sometimes didn’t turn up to) it wasn’t a set night because he could never give me one. Then he wanted to change it to every Friday every other sat and every other Sunday night and a night in the week..now he wants to change it again to every other week he sees her and he’ll see her more in the week.
I’ve said no to this arrangement because she suffers from anxiety and likes routine.

If I’m honest she doesn’t really like staying over. I’ve said that he can do the every other weekend but no nights in the week because now she’s back at school it’s too disruptive.
She cries when it’s bedtime and he says he wants his life back.

My argument is he needs to fix whatever’s wrong with their relationship. As hell only be swapping every other fri and sat for 2 other nights in the week.

He wants to do mediation but I can’t afford it. And now he’s applying for a court order.

Can someone tell me what the next steps are please? Do I just have to roll over?
My LO is 9 and doesn’t want it to change..and if she had her way she’d only see him in the day.

I’m
At my wits end with it.

Please help. He’s abusive and vile to me and has also started swearing at our little girl.
I feel I get nowhere when I try and reason with him

OP posts:
NewName2106 · 14/09/2020 14:44

Someone with more experience and knowledge will come along but I’d make sure you document as much as possible the changes he’s requested, when, how etc and also what he’s actually turned up for.

The court will be looking after your daughters interest and they want routine and safety for her.

Make notes of any bad behaviour too.

Good luck.

stealthmama · 14/09/2020 14:55

At 9yo your daughters wants will be taken into account here, meaning she will be lightly interviewed (visit at home) if there is disparity between the parents.

Whilst it's normal for change to occur as a child grows and their life becomes busier, it sounds at the moment that a court ordered agreement might not be a bad idea given the anxiety you mention and that you nih can't agree and stick to a plan.

Though, having it doesn't mean he then always sticks to the plan of course. Once a flakey dad always a flakey dad.

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