Blushing

[CB333]

My daughter blushes at everything and is now at secondary school and hating it as others are making fun of her ☹️. As a result she doesn’t want to go to school so the mornings are fairly stressful to say the least. I’m desperate to help her and we’ve discussed some CBT strategies to use but she’s reluctant to engage in them. I wondered whether there are any make up products on the market that might help. Does anyone have any helpful tips/ideas please??

Bless her, I know how she feels as I've always blushed. I use a green primer under my foundation which helps a wee bit I think.

Don't tell her I still blush and I'm nearly 60...

This was me as a teenager and I absolutely hated it. What helped me as I got older was wearing a light/natural fake tan on my face. As my skin tone was ever so slightly darker the blushing couldn’t be seen as much and that gave me more confidence and I stopped worrying about it which in turn seemed to stop it. I do feel for her as it made me miserable for years.

Ahh thanks. I’ll look into the green primer . Thank you x

Great idea. Thanks so much. It’s like a vicious circle as the more she thinks about it the worse it gets! So yes giving her confidence would be a massive step in the right direction

I was talking about this the other day - I suffer from it too. The woman in the no7 counter recommended cica paste. Think that's what it's called. Lots of companies make it. Put it on at night I think. I've not tried it though....sorry!

Oh god, I can really empathise. I've been a blusher all my life. It's horrendous. I've not yet found a solution. Mine is very much based around social anxiety.

I was like that. I used to use green foundation stuff.

The awful thing is that when you blush you get embarrassed about that and blush even more!

I don't blush nearly so much any more - is worst when you're young and so self conscious.

So maybe that's something for her to hang onto.

Also it's entirely natural and surely the only way to control it would be by somehow avoiding feeling certain emotions. Which wouldn't be a good thing obv.

I blushed for years and years. Just thinking about blushing would make me blush. I’d recommend CBT as I had it for PND and social anxiety but for some reason it completely stopped my blushing. I can’t blush even if I want to now! It just doesn’t cross my mind now when it was all I could think about when interacting with other people from childhood onwards. Liberating!

I had (sometimes still have) this. I really REALLY struggled with it too. It is even a recognised phobia - Erythrophobia.

For me I noticed that it was related to my heart rate, so if I was put in a situation where I worried I would blush, I would panic, heart rate rose and then the inevitable.

I’ve never had CBT but really think it sounds like a good way to go. I tried a few things including hypnotherapy but ultimately I just mostly grew out of it. My only helpful tip is that focusing on my breathing helped a bit.

For me it was my colouring (very pale) and so it was obvious and that made me self conscious and etc.

I know how it makes you feel. All the time thinking oh fuck I could blush for no reason and then just thinking it sets you off and then you're embarrassed and makes it worse etc.

I really do understand but it's natural. It's how we are. For an adult, looking into ways to help us obviously fine. For a kid though, it might enforce that it needs 'treating', that it's that bad, not normal. I would be very cautious doing that with a child. I do know how it is but focussing on it that much makes it an even bigger deal. It's just how we are. Nothing wrong with it apart from other people being dicks.

I totally sympathise! Had a bad blushing problem a few years ago - always been socially anxious so would blush all the time and my colleagues would oh-so-helpfully point it out! I started using Veil cover cream - it's used for scars, rosea, to cover up tattoos etc...it helped me loads. I think it does hide the blushing - no one mentions it anymore and when I catch my reflection I don't seem to turn red. I still technically blush all the time but it isn't an issue cos of the make up. I use the powder as well otherwise the make up has a green tinge. Really hope you find something that helps your daughter.

I use a powder foundation which seems to help redness.

I still blush now, but was a prolific blusher in my teenage years: I remember blushing when I had to talk in a maths class and then being hyper conscious of the blushing which made it worse. One tactic that really helped me was one time just acknowledging it, I said something like “oh I can feel I’m blushing, don’t know why I’m doing that” and it seemed to really help me. Knowing I could say something like that really took the pressure off. Not saying it’s right for your daughter but I’m sure she’ll find some tactics that work for her.

Huge sympathies from me. I used to blush all the time and hated it.

I found that just accepting it worked well. For presentations I would just think, yeah I’m going to go red but who cares. It did help.

I also read that other people like people who blush because it shows we are honest?!

But also, if it’s social anxiety, do get her some support.

My heart goes out to her. I spent my childhood and teenage years going bright scarlet at the drop of a hat, and then going even redder as people pointed it out and made a big thing of it. I've always had social anxiety and got into a vicious circle with that and the blushing. I just lived with it - never tried make-up for it or anything because I thought it would draw more attention to my face (I'm basically a mouse and have gone through life trying to be invisible), but it sounds as if there are a few things your daughter could try. Mine did eventually tail off on its own and it rarely happens now.

Thanks everyone, lots of things to try x

Hello, did your daughter manager to overcome this? I hope she's doing ok now.

This is me too OP. I use the dr jart cicapair cream + missha perfect cover bb cream and it completely covers the redness.

Oh me too! High school was hard.

Try hypnotherapy, it really helped me to not care if l blushed.