Been discharged from NHS counselling

[Bryyy]

After 2 sessions they’ve told me the 6 lessons won’t help at all and that I need longer term talk therapy. I feel very lost by this as I thought they’d be able to help. It also has to be done privately and I don’t have the ££ for it.

Have they said why? And why won’t they let you do the 6 sessions at least?

Unfortunately NHS psychological therapies are very limited, and the usual CBT/ counselling offering is not adequate to help many people. Some areas do have more intensive therapies available, but the waiting list can be years long and you'd need to have exhausted all other options first.

It's worth looking up if there are any charities in your area that offer free or low cost therapy. Also many therapists offer lower cost appointments for a limited number of clients.

They said the tools that they’d give be via CBT I already more or less do. In fact I over rationalise to the extent that I’m suppressing my feelings. She also said short therapy is for any recent traumatic event and I don’t have any Specific trauma to solve.

*And why won’t they let you do the 6 sessions at least?

It's generally unconstructive for the client to start to open up about issues, only to then have the therapy bluntly ended. Also, the therapists that conduct the short term treatments are rarely qualified to offer the more specialist therapies.

It’s just not ideal. I don’t feel great but have to learn to feel this way while I figure out what to do next.

I'd go back to your gp and request referral to mental health services.
My gp referred me for cbt on my initial appointment they said I wasn't suitable I'm now on a waiting list for specialist input the downside is I've been waiting 21 months so far and prior to covid was expected to get treatment christmas time. I think it will be a longer wait than that now but at least I'm in the system.

This must be so frustrating. As a pp said, look to some charities, and look at the fee structure for some private therapists.

In the meantime, how are you generally? Have you a support network?

Thanks Green I’ll try that. She did seemed to be out of her comfort zone and onLy wanted me to apply things from leaflets. When I explained to her that no, I’m never harsh on my self and that rationalising things have left me feeling almost numb is when she basically wrapped things up and told me she couldn’t be of any help.

Nothing constructive to add I'm afraid, but I sympathise with you. I've had three attempts to get somewhere with NHS CBT (I really needed counselling but that wasn't on offer) the first one was cancelled but they didn't bother to tell me until I turned up. Then they discharged me for not turning up!

Second time I had a therapist I got on with but after the first session she went on long term sick. The third woman I had asked me what my coping strategies were, said that she only saw people that couldn't get out of bed in the morning and the fact I was holding down a job showed I didn't need any help. I only managed 10 minutes out of an hour session!

I paid privately for counselling and it did me the world of good, despite leaving me pretty strapped for cash. Definitely see if you can access some at a lower cost because it may be the best thing you ever do - it was for me.

letsnotargue I was left with a similar taste in my mouth. Yes, life isn’t terrible but suddenly (due to some recent events with my DP) it’s like the colour has been taken away. I know it will pass and things will get better but hate feeling this way.

Sorry to hear this @Bryyy. I second trying to find somewhere that might offer longer-term counselling at a reduced rate or for free. Local womens centre here was offering this. I've used a place that had a pay-what-you-can scheme, & they also took clients through an employee scheme. Employer paid so it was short-term but the counsellors seemed very skilled at managing that when I used that scheme.

Hope you find what you need.

She referred me to that online counselling advertised on Facebook. I tried it once and it definitely wasn’t for me either. I wish finding a therap wasn’t so hard.

Its an awful situation, speaking as a counsellor. Short term solution focused therapy (cbt through the iapt service) is very restrictive. It feels a lot like a tick box exercise, with little to no room to undertake anything resembling therapeutic movement or to build a trusting relationship.
While cbt has its place its not sufficient for the vast majority who are referred for the service. 6 sessions (or less) is just not enough.

I wish i had something more useful to add, i wish counselling was more accessible. Good luck OP

So sorry that you are experiencing this, OP.

Have you done a search for local services? I know of services in our area that offer a sliding scale to make it accessible for as many people as possible.

I can completely understand your disappointment too. Unfortunately NHS "therapy" services are very limited these days and not really therapy at all...

I do understand why they have not offered the 6 sessions as it would be more harmful to start with someone not equipped to help and then have to stop so soon anyway.

There are quite a few different ways to access free or low cost therapy - charities like Mind, and women's centres, as others have mentioned, and also any organisation offering counselling and psychotherapy training often has their own low cost service. You would be seeing a trainee but they are extremely closely supervised and will already be at a later stage of their training (and much better qualified already than the NHS ones who just use leaflets and box ticking exercises!).

They 'improved access to psychological therapies' by making them super brief and unsuitable for most, while raising the threshold for adult mental health services so that qualifying is very unusual indeed. There is a huge gap in the middle. It's not fair.

At least I'm glad I'm not the only one who feels that unless your in immediate danger everything else is fine. I dont feel blargh all the time which is also why I'm not a candidate for antidepressants. I live a normal and fulfilling life most of the time until something "triggers" me.

I'm actively suicidal and they gave me the exact same spiel. I ended up paying privately which I cant really afford but I just had to pick up extra hours and downgrade the TV package etc to make up the £50 a week plus petrol as I drive an hour to my therapist. It has had its advantages though as I was able to choose him myself and I know his qualifications and expertise. We are also not limited in time. Its taken me 6 months just to learn to trust him and start to open up about the real issues rather than the immediate surface level stuff. 6 sessions would have been pointless.

Thank you for all your replies. It's definitely making me less crazy and more like it's the system and not me.

Its definitely the system not you. Its not good enough and the practitioners know it. Its why they can't hold on to therapists.