Self help book recommendations on depression/anxiety please

[Ruminating2020]

Posting this here for traffic.

I have not been feeling myself over the last 4 weeks or so and have been ruminating over my past behaviour. I have gone through feelings of guilt, shame, regret and self loathing over things which I did as a teenager and even in my 20s, and can't help feeling and telling myself what a terrible person I am.

My sleep has been affected as a result of this and I usually wake up in the middle of the night with heart palpitations and reminders of past events. I have already been to the GP for blood tests to see whether there is a medical reason for the palpitations but still don't have the results.

I have a feeling that the waiting list to see a therapist or receive any sort of treatment for anxiety will be long, so I am hoping someone on here may know some good books on the topic or strategies for coping, please. DH has been amazing in supporting and reassuring me but it's not fair on him to keep burdening him like this.

Please help. I am feeling worse everyday, even though I keep thinking it will pass once I'm away or once I'm back at work with human interaction.

Thank you in advance.

The only thing I know of that categorically works quickly is medication. I have read the books and tried the supplements and they did little. Meditation didn't help. Psychotherapy made it worse.

The only things that might help are exercise and getting your life back, seeing people, being busy etc. Hard when you feel like shot though! I've also had success with an alpha-stim AID machine. £500 or so though.

Thanks @Vodkacranberryplease. I'd like to avoid medication if possible. Would that involve being referred to MH services first for a diagnosis before treatment recommendation?

Work will start back properly next week so I am hoping the busyness will distract me.

I’ve found these all very helpful:

Overcoming Anxiety: A self-help guide using cognitive behavioural techniques by Helen Kennerley, part of the Books on Prescription scheme.

Overcoming Depression by Paul Gilbert. Or whichever of the ‘Overcoming...’ series seems most relevant to you.

Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway, Susan Jeffries (more wide-ranging than the title suggests).

The Happiness Trap or The Reality Slap by Russ Harris (both good).

Hi @SparklingLime, thank you for title suggestions. I shall have a look at the reviews to see whether they are suitable.

Sorry, it’s actually Susan Jeffers. Some of these are available as audiobooks in case that would be easier.

The Feeling Good Handbook by David M. Burns (it's hefty)

I have found health supplements really work. I currently take high dose multi vitamins and Passion flower (which is really good for calming anxiety.) B vitamins also great for both anxiety and depression. Hope you feel better soon x

Medication did nothing for me except make me feel very ill. I hear it can be amazing for some people though.

The book that changed my life (and cured my very severe panic disorder) was - well, any book by Claire Weekes. Essentially teaches you never to fight anxiety. A more modern version that rips off every aspect of her philosophy without giving her much credit (!) is At Last A Life

Thanks @Palavah.

@whydontkidscomewithauserguide how long have you been taking supplements for?

A lot of health authorities have Increasing Access to Psychological Therapies (IAPT) services that you can self-refer to.

Waiting times will vary for 1-1 and am not sure what’s happening re Covid19 but many also do groups.

You should find your nearest here:

www.nhs.uk/service-search/other-services/Psychological%20therapies%20%28IAPT%29/LocationSearch/10008

Thank you Member.

Start by seeing your GP. One of the options I was offered was actually a reading list!

Depressive Illness -The Curae of the Strong by Dr Tim Cantopher

I started to feel like this about 2 years ago, I think it had been there slowly creeping up for a while and I hadn't really noticed until one day I had full blown anxiety which I think then became depression. The anxiety made me feel very jittery, nervous, tense and panicky. I lost all interest in food and found it hard to sleep. I found myself reaching for a glass of wine more than I would usually as it's all that helped calm my nerves. The depression felt like total grief and sadness, very low motivation, no joy in the usual things, avoiding socialising etc, found tv, books and music all hard to enjoy and was very tearful and irritated. I had a lot of intrusive thoughts, all about my marriage and if we were really happy or not etc.

This lasted a good 6 months before I read a book called "Depression: The curse of the strong" by Tim Cantopher which made me see that this wasn't just going to disappear on its own and that medication and therapy combined would likely help. So I called the GP and was prescribed sertraline, like you I was very reluctant to take it and felt like it was the last resort. It definitely helped, I took it for 6 months and I would say it helped to 'reset' my emotions. I would say it gave me a rest from my feelings for a bit which was good in many ways but I still didn't feel like my 'old self' which is really hard to pin point but I guess it's like when you're poorly with a sore throat / cold and then you feel better again. I saw 3 therapists until I found the right one and with their help I weaned off the sertraline gradually and finally felt much better and content as usual. If I had my time again I would 100% take the medication but knowing that it would give me some respite but wouldn't necessarily deal with the causes of my anxiety and depression, for that I needed therapy.

In terms of well being, I look for instant results and find it hard to tell if supplements, exercise, nutrition and sleep help my mental health but everyone says they do and so I really make an effort with them because i think there is often a subtle improvement when I focus on prioritising these things. I take Saffrosun from the Naked Pharmacy, magnesium, oil of evening primrose and B12.

It's good that your DH is being supportive, keep talking to him. Sending you my best wishes, I know how desperate I felt at times

Self Help for your Nerves by Claire Weekes really helped me, I also had CBT through our local IAPT service. I had low level anxiety and depression and also the intrusive thoughts about my marriage that @Parkmama describes.

Thank you for further posts.

@Wolfiefan I spoke to my GP initially about the heart palpitations and ruminating over the phone but I think I will try again and ask about anxiety and whether a self referral would be appropriate.

Thank you for your story @Parkmama. I really want it to go away on its own but I'm worried that it will get worse instead. I shall try vitamin B12, since it has already been mentioned. I've been going for a run twice a week during lockdown but I will be in work tomorrow so I have the walk there and back and a change of scenery. I shall have a look at the book that @cleowasmycat has already mentioned.

Thanks @EasilyDeleted I shall have a look.

@Ruminating2020 it may go away on its own, often I would have 'glimmer' days where I would feel totally normal and think 'great! I'm over it' but it would return the next day. Those glimmer days were helpful though, they made me see something was definitely not right. I also found chatting to a few select friends helped too, it was through one of them that I discovered the therapist who helped turn things around. Also you might want to consider if your hormones have a role to play? Perhaps see if there is a pattern around different times of the month.

Mind Over Mood is a good book to walk you through CBT.

Anything by Dorothy Rowe or Claire Weekes

This website called CBT4PANIC changed my life it's free you can just read whatever you like it has diff subsections.

@whydontkidscomewithauserguide

I have found health supplements really work. I currently take high dose multi vitamins and Passion flower (which is really good for calming anxiety.) B vitamins also great for both anxiety and depression. Hope you feel better soon x

Me too! Two terrific books which give lots of science-backer recommendations:

The Chemistry of Calm
The Chemistry of Joy

Both by Henry Emmons, MD

Thank you for suggestions. I will have a look at the books and start taking vitamin b.

I would really recommend any of Dr Ranjan Chatterjee's books. this one is the latest but they are all excellent. He has a very good website too.

Although not geared specifically towards depression and anxiety he explains clearly how everyday stress can make these symptoms so much worse, and he has a lots of practical advice on how some fairly basic lifestyle changes can help make a positive difference - all based on dealing with his own patients (he is a practising GP).

Thanks @TonTonMacoute. I shall have a look.