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Did anyone else go through a very stressful first trimester specifically and how are your DC now?

8 replies

Prelockdownbaby · 31/08/2020 09:27

I found out that I was pregnant a few days before lockdown was formally announced, when it was really clear it was imminent. We'd actually decided to stop TTC for the time being due to pandemic but then got BFP, which we are nonetheless very happy about

So far the pregnancy appears to be progressing normally (we have had bad news and conditions diagnosed in pregnancy twice before so this is a huge comfort) but I have a nagging worry about how I was in the first few weeks after finding out which I think some thoroughly unscientific anecdata will help me with!

I appreciate we probably evolved being chased by big cats etc but it also seems fairly accepted in the scientific community that stressful life events (especially first trimester) are correlated with higher risk of adverse neurodevelopmental outcomes in offspring.

I tell myself all the time how lucky we are, it was first world problems etc etc but however much I remind myself of that it doesn't take away from the fact that at the time I couldn't sleep, was crying constantly, worrying endlessly about finances, my DC1, the risk of the virus on the embryo (since I contracted a transmittable infection in my first pregnancy) etc etc. I had a tight chest, chest pains and all sorts. Eventually got it under control and for the last couple of months have felt absolutely fine and dare I say it pretty optimistic and happy again.

Can anybody who has been through a stressful time in very early pregnancy specifically share stories of their DC so I know it's not necessarily doom and gloom? (As I know really it can't be) I worry I've let them down already but there was really nothing I could do - I tried mindfulness, exercise, healthy eating but nothing stopped me feeling that way at the time

OP posts:
Prelockdownbaby · 31/08/2020 11:27

Nervous bump!

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FoxtrotOscarPoppet · 31/08/2020 11:39

I had quite a stressful first trimester.

Doesn’t seem to have had an effect on my DD - she was always a happy baby and is now a smart, happy, healthy 3 yr old.

It’s easy to say but try not to worry. When are you due?

ImInShock28 · 31/08/2020 11:43

I had an awful pregnancy with DS3. I was in a DV relationship and he didnt stop when I was pregnant. Just got my face only. I developed pre natal depression and DS had IUGR. I honestly think his low weight was down to his stressful pregnancy. He was born at 37 weeks weighing 4lb 14oz.

His first 8 months of life wernt pleasant for him. I had PND and didnt bond with him until he was well over a year old

He is 3 now and he is such a happy confident, cocky little boy Grin I have always been worried about him, he had a speech delayment when he was younger but he speaks well for his age now.

He is very happy, my DD is very sensitive compared to him and she had a very nice peaceful pregnancy

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Prelockdownbaby · 31/08/2020 13:00

I'm sorry to hear about your experiences but glad to hear about your lovely happy kids!

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herrcomesthenamechanger · 31/08/2020 13:11

My dad was violent to mum when she's was pregnant with me, so much so she nearly died twice. She was also entirely isolated.

I'm fine, no health problems, no psychological problems (she left him obviously) I'm successful and senior in my career, got a doctorate qualification. Have a good life with friends, a DH and a wonderful little boy.

I think you'll be ok Smile

tired17 · 31/08/2020 13:31

I had a big car accident when I had just found out I was pregnant so only about 4 weeks. Luckily I didn't break any bones but my whole body went into spasm for several days and I was then diagnosed with depression and anxiety which, looking back, I think was triggered by it.

The whole pregnancy was grim, partly due to the depression and partly worry about any damage that had been done.

However all was fine and my DD is now 16 and starting 6th form this week. The only possible side effect was that her baby molar teeth came through with brown marks on them which the dentist said were probably caused by a trauma at the time they started to develop in the womb. It didn't affect their strength in any way and, her adult teeth are fine.

Please don't worry, just enjoy the rest of your pregnancy

lborgia · 31/08/2020 13:44

My eldest did not start well. I was emotionally and physically unwell, and taking prescription medicine. My GP panicked and said I had to come off over of them asap, which I afterwards discovered was the worst thing I could do. I had a horrible tummy bug, hugely, life changing, news, and the rest of the pregnancy was worse.

He is now a strapping teenager, nauseating in his abilities in every kind of field and has all his bits and bobs.

My second child has not fared so well, despite a far less adventurous first weeks/ months/ years...

I'm sure statistically there can be a link, but is probably weighted by issues such as fetal alcohol syndrome.

Try not to worry, and tell your gp or midwife, please.

Prelockdownbaby · 02/09/2020 08:25

I'm so sorry. These circumstances sound so difficult and far more traumatic of course than lockdown for me

I'm so glad you and your children are well and happy now

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