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Original poster

Do we all have too much stuff???

133 replies

Notcontent · 29/08/2020 23:25

I moved house recently (had another thread about how stressful that was!). I moved to a house pretty much the same size as my old house but both houses are quite small. Anyway, as part of the moving process I had to obviously find new places to put everything etc and I felt really overwhelmed by how much stuff I have. It’s just me and a teen, and I did lots of decluttering before the move, but it still feels like we have a lot of stuff. But we don’t have a garage or a loft where we can just stuff random things out of sight, so I think we probably have fewer things than a lot of people.

If you have a small house or flat, are you constantly decluttering? Or if you have a large house, is it full of stuff and do you ever feel overwhelmed by it?

OP posts:
HaveYouSeenMyFriendKimberley · 02/09/2020 14:26

Sounds like you've started decluttering op.

I'm doing it slowly. Moving house is a great place to start! You've done the hard part which is seeing the issue and starting the process.

Tigger001 · 02/09/2020 14:26

Yes and we just kerp growing into the next size house, it looks brilliant and spacious until you get in and grow into it.

My DM used to say, " you dont need a bigger house again, you need less stuff " and she was right.

ChanceEncounter · 02/09/2020 14:50

we just kerp growing into the next size house

Shock expensive storage!!

Blackbear19 · 02/09/2020 15:55

Yip solving the too much stuff issue by having a bigger house isn't the answer.

Been there done that. I keep reminding myself my DM raised two of us in a 2 Bed flat.

I can't decide if this is the best place to ask this question or if I should start a new thread.
How many toys / types of toys do kids actually need?

My 3 year old has me drowning in Duplo.
He has 3 types of train set, food stuff, cars, various tie ins to cartoon type toys. Plus jigsaws, books, blocks, workbench, mechano thing, magformers Confused

I'm thinking at least 1 trainset has to go and I should thin out the duplo. Its overwhelming for me never mind him.

ChanceEncounter · 02/09/2020 16:13

@Blackbear19

I was pretty ruthless after reading about how little children actually needed, and that too many toys overwhelm them and make it harder to concentrate or settle to anything.

Perhaps the answer is to take away half, put well out of sight, and see if they seem in anyway put out?

For example I went from thirty cars to about five!

Blackbear19 · 02/09/2020 16:18

Wow! 30 cars down to 5!
What's really sad is I could do the same and DS would never notice.

I'm going to start tackling it tonight.

minnieok · 02/09/2020 16:24

Yes way too much. Hence dp and I buying a 4 bed house just for us (justification is that between us we have 4 adult kids, chances of them all staying at once is close to zero!)

When I moved here I got rid of 8 bin bags of clothes yet I still filled a triple wardrobe, and I have "nothing" to wear of course!

ChanceEncounter · 02/09/2020 16:28

@Blackbear19

Wow! 30 cars down to 5! What's really sad is I could do the same and DS would never notice.

I'm going to start tackling it tonight.

Good luck! Don't throw it away straight away then you can rescue the green car or whatever if you make an error Smile
Blackbear19 · 02/09/2020 16:42

I've made that mistake before with DS1 and he found the flipping bag of stuff. Talk about bag your head of a brick wall.

ChanceEncounter · 02/09/2020 16:54

@Blackbear19

I've made that mistake before with DS1 and he found the flipping bag of stuff. Talk about bag your head of a brick wall.
Yes you must put a protective charm on the stashed toys or you are doomed to repeat this process many times!
Blackbear19 · 02/09/2020 17:37

Harry Potter I'm not!Grin

InDeoEstMeaFiducia · 02/09/2020 17:45

Nope. I like all my stuff.

EstherLittle · 02/09/2020 17:56

If it’s any consolation I am finding it easier to have a clutter free house now that my dc are older and out of the small world type toy stage.

I have rejigged their rooms over the summer to make sure everything fits plus the box room is now DH’s office for the foreseeable future.

Blackbear19 · 02/09/2020 18:21

This time last year, we decided we'd try the posh dining table in the living room freeing up the posh dining room used once a year to become a toy room.

Never quiet got it completely sorted out when lockdown happened. The toy room is now doubling up as an office. Confused

Which sort of adds to the clutter and mess. Ultimately their is too much stuff and I need to put energy into thinning it out before the winter deluge of birthdays and Christmas.

whirlwindwallaby · 02/09/2020 18:53

@NamedyChangedy

I've been an aspiring minimalist for years. Clutter makes such a huge difference to my mood, it's definitely not a trend for people who are affected by it.
Yes, I did my first spontaneous clear out at the age of 9. I slept on the floor for six months when I wasn't allowed to get rid of my bed though.
PerveenMistry · 02/09/2020 19:32

Trying to de clutter but it's daunting.

Blackbear19 · 02/09/2020 21:29

Very daunting - I've just separated and sorted two train sets. And I thought I knew which one to move on, now I'm rethinkingHmm.

DisgruntledGuineaPig · 05/09/2020 09:26

I've come back to this thread after a chat with an older lady about clutter and all the stuff.

She said that compared to when she was younger, most things like clothes, technology, children's toys etc are much cheaper (relative to income), but that houses are much more expensive (again, relative to income).

That a generation or two back, the sort of people who could afford so much stuff, would be living in much bigger houses.

That the 30s 3 bed semi houses we were trying to squeeze everything in, where build assuming a family of 4 who could afford this house wouldn't have many things to go in it.

I'm not sure how true this is, but it did make sense!

GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER · 05/09/2020 10:03

People do generally have way more stuff than was usual some decades ago. Far more clothes, far more children’s toys, household goods and other stuff generally.

The reason is almost certainly that so much of it is far cheaper than it used to be, because it’s made in countries with very low labour costs.

Masses of the stuff that’s now made in China/Vietnam etc. used to be made in the U.K., was relatively rather more expensive, so most people bought considerably less stuff - and looked after it - because it was expensive to replace.

CrunchyNutNC · 05/09/2020 10:21

This is what I dislike about christmas now, the norm seems to be to buy loads of stuff for people without thought as to whether they need it or would really like it.

Every year there are a few small things I'd really like (some lovely new fluffy tea towels, some nice socks, a nice bottle of wine, a single bottle of expensive bath soak) but never get because the gift-givers would rather buy me a pile of useless stuff of the sort that nobody would ever buy themselves because that's seen to be the thing to do.

It's as if Christmas has become about showering people with high volumes of stuff (which add up to alot of money), rather than buying them a thoughtful gift. Sad.

ChanceChanceChance · 05/09/2020 10:29

I totally agree about Christmas @CrunchyNutNC we just despaired at one stage. We've got it down a lot by asking people not to, but some just send anyway.

We moved to buying almost exclusively luxury food for presents so we don't clog up other people's houses!

I also now have parents who are passing things on. I go to the charity shop a lot!

StCharlotte · 05/09/2020 10:37

I tend to work along the William Morrison quote "Have nothing in your house that you do not know to be useful, or believe to be beautiful."

Every time we've moved, we've filled a skip. We made our "final" move five years ago and I've been quite ruthless since then. We don't need anything now so anything we do buy is something we need or something beautiful.

But clothes are my weakness. I do get rid but It's more a case of one out three in Blush

RingtheBells · 05/09/2020 10:47

"Have nothing in your house that you do not know to be useful, or believe to be beautiful."

I try to go by this quote but unfortunately I haven't quite got DH on side with this yet, I'm working on it but it is a bit of an impossible task

DisgruntledGuineaPig · 05/09/2020 10:59

Yes, its the cheaper things but more expensive storage (ie houses!).

I ended up on the conversation with the older lady and mentioned this thread because we were talking about coats.

Basically, I don't feel like I have a lot of coats compared to many people - but when counting, I have a smart winter wool coat, a thick padded "big" coat, a less smart wool coat thats shorter, a smart spring trench, a casual rain mac (with hood), and 2 leather jackets plus a denim jacket. So 8. She was saying when she was younger mother, (1970s) you had a winter coat and a spring coat and you just wore them for all situations, if you lived in these sorts of houses. But then said some woman did have 8 coats, those were richer woman who lived in much bigger houses.

It then moved into a chat about how the street had changed, the job titles of people who live in our street had got "posher" over the last 40+ years, she'd mentioned the solicitor who lives across from her, that 40/50 years ago, a middle aged solicitor wouldn't be living in such a small house. A solicitors wife may well have had 10+ coats in the 70s, its just she would be living in a house with enough wardrobe space for them all... Smile

Orangecake123 · 05/09/2020 11:37

CrunchyNutNC for christmas I've reduced the number of people I buy gifts for. I've agreed to not do gifts for my parents and my brother. So it's only my two younger sisters I buy for and last year was a chocolate box each + a coffee shop gift card + tickets for a london show.

For two others: it was a tin of M&S shortbread and I do also tend to give chocolate and send flowers for birthday gifts too.

Disgruntled - that is interesting to read and i think it says a lot too! I have one thick coat. My sister's raincoat. Four pairs of shoes. Two pairs of jeans. Still too many t-shirts and tights though!