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Partner self-harmed

1 reply

TravellingWife · 26/08/2020 06:34

Just need a bit of advice or some kind words really. Have NCed because I had mentioned DD’s name and my job on my usual account making me very traceable.
Last night my DP self harmed using a razor on his arms. He did this a lot when we were younger but would never seek help for it. However he hasn’t done it for at least the past 10 years.
When I tried to talk about it to him last night he just kept calling himself “stupid” and an “idiot” and begging me not to leave him (that never crossed my mind).
He’s been very anxious during lockdown. He’s severely dyslexic and works in a creative job that he couldn’t do at all until recently because of lockdown. He was petrified he wouldn’t be able to do any other job because he finds reading and writing so hard. He was worried about money as he’s only paid for the work he does and we have a large Debt due to some medical issues.
I’m so worried he will do it again especially as he hasn’t told me what triggered it this time.

We have one DD together and I’m worried and confused about what to say when she sees her daddy’s arms.

OP posts:
SweetPetrichor · 26/08/2020 09:32

Sorry, I don't have anything useful to say but didn't want to read and run. I struggle with occasional bouts of self harm and I can't reason with it - which is why I say I can't be much help. For me, it's in times of high stress and it's usually punishment to myself for a perceived failing, but sometimes it's also bargaining for my partner's safety, for example, "I burn myself x number of times and my DP will be safe". It's hard to ration with and the only success I've had is working on keeping my overall mental health up. I use the Calm App and I am under the care of the local mental health team. Time's are hard right now - I wish I could offer more help, but I can't.

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