I used to place a huge amount of importance on breastfeeding. I still think it’s great and plan to do it again for DC2 but I’m not going to stress is occasionally she needs a bottle of formula so I can live my life. And contrary to my pre-child beliefs, weaning before two is not going to do any harm if breastfeeding stops working for either of us.
Bedsharing. I used to think it was the most amazing, natural, lovely thing to do. Then I realised I hate sharing my space. I put up with it for so long because I couldn’t cope with DS being upset but DC2 is going to have to lump it because my quality of sleep massively affects my mental health.
Sleep training. I thought was ghastly and basically akin to child abuse. Until I had a baby who woke every 45 minutes and I was basically suicidal. Then I realised it was sometimes wholly necessary and could be done without leaving a baby to scream on their own for hours.
Food. You can be the most amazing cook and make the most wholesome meals you like for your baby and they probably will accept it all but they’ll go through a fussy stage as a toddler and you just have to go with it. It turns out it’s not just shitty parenting that causes kids to be fussy. They just are!
Screen time. DS wasn’t going to watch any tv until he was 2. Fuck me sometimes i need to sit down and drink a coffee without it being demanded that I am entertaining.
... basically I was a massive sanctimonious arsehole pre-kids and now I realise it’s wayyyyy more important that a baby/child has a sane parent who is doing their best as much of the time as they can, than one who is losing the will to live but doing everything ‘perfectly’.