How do I stop doing this!

[Fallowdeerhunter]

I’m a single parent to a 6 year old and we both remained in the 4 bed home when my partner left. I’m now finding it really hard to manage on my own and find I’m just constantly tidying and sorting, it’s endless.

Every time my ex has our child I’m just spending the whole weekend doing the next big job that needs to be done - sorting out cupboards, old clothes, toys to give away. I’m also trying to find time to redecorate as the house needs refreshing.

I’m just tired of constantly having a to-do list which runs into pages. And feeling weirdly jealous of my ex’s 2 bed rental flat......any one have any tips for me to manage better?

Assume this is a sort of anxiety, or way to feel like you are in control of the situation? I always tidy/sort when I feel like this. And also have a ridiculously long 'to do' list.
Apparently mindfulness is supposed to be really helpful, but I'm not there yet.

I'm no huge expert as I often feel the same. What has worked for me is an initial big effort to massively reduce the number of things I own, and then following a routine with the cleaning where I force myself to do half an hour every day.

We sorted out the dc's toys so they are all easy to put away and none of the containers are overflowing, and started having points during the day where we would have a clean so it isn't overwhelming at bedtime. We use Alexa to play music for cleaning up toys

I don't know if this is oversimplistic, but is there a reason you couldn't sell the big house and move somewhere smaller if it's just the 2 of you?

You would have the same problem in a smaller property and it would be worse because there would be less space.? Make good use of your spare rooms.

@LockdownMayhem can’t due that unfortunately due to complicated finances involved which I won’t go in to!

You sound like an organised person so I'd advise including nice things rather than jobs on your list. Maybe do a kind of timetable for yourself so in the morning you might go for a long walk and then in the afternoon tackle a job, then see a friend or watch a film in the evening.

I have heard good things about the organised mum method, might be worth a try?

I would have a look at some of the simple living websites : slow your home, be more with less, becoming minimalist, zen habits, flylady.
All slightly different slants, but the main premise is reducing the number of things you own/commitments, and developing daily routines that mean you get things done efficiently and have more time to enjoy life.
It's a life changer if you take your time and don't get obsessive about any one method of getting everything done at once.
They're all googleable.

I meant or* getting everything done at once

Thanks for all the advice everyone, will get googling

Good luck, and let us know h it goes (if you want to!)