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Original poster

3rd degree tear and next pregnancy

25 replies

MrsJoJangles · 21/08/2020 11:39

Hi all.
Im new to mumsnet but saw there was more info and discussions on here about 3rd degree tears than anywhere else on the whole of blooming google so thought Id better join

So, my partner and I are discussing trying for another baby. Our DD1 is now 14 months but my recovery was awful after suffering a third degree tear. I would love to try for another baby but am terrified this will happen again. How long did it take for you to feel confident enough to try again? Did you go through the natural or elective section route?

Thanks everyone

OP posts:

Flynn2019 · 21/08/2020 11:58

Hey, I don't have experience with a 3rd degree tear, mines was 2nd and healed pretty well, although I think if you were pregnant with number 2 a conversation with your midwife around how you are feeling would be best. Entirely up to you but if it was very traumatic I would be asking for a c section. I am pregnant with my second currently, first is 17 months, he was very over due 12 days, I was taken in to be induced but ended up going into spontaneous labour. After I had him the midwife asked me if I was a smoker because my placenta was soo grity and aged. I couldn't believe it. It is now a concern for me and I don't want to be left as late to be induced this time around. Midwife said we can discuss option nearer the time of delivery x

HalfBloodPrincess · 21/08/2020 12:04

I had a 3rd degree tear with baby #3.
Was similarily worried but baby #4 came along 20 months later and I didnt tear or need episiotomy at all. She was 9oz lighter but head circumference was 2cm bigger.

User56770987 · 21/08/2020 14:00

4th degree tear here.
2nd baby 2.5 years later
Elective section

Interested in this thread?

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Antenatal & postnatal Childbirth Families

OhYeahYouSuck · 21/08/2020 15:19

I had an elective section after my 3rd degree tear. I wasn't going to but she was breech so no choice. I'm glad I did though! I found the recovery from that much better. Also bear in mind, if you tear again the damage will be worse.

Allhallowseve · 21/08/2020 15:22

Hi I had 3rd degree tear with first baby have gone on to have two more natural deliveries . Second had an episiotomy and third baby second degree tear.
All healed fine .
You will see a consultant for next baby and they were more than happy for me to have a c section if I wanted .

Meganplays · 21/08/2020 15:42

Baby one- 3rd degree tear. Healed well.
Baby two- 30 months later, 3rd degree tear. Healed better than the first.
Baby three- 1st degree tear, healed well.

However my friend who had a bad 3rd degree tear that healed terribly had elective sections for her other children as the risk of it not healing well was too high.

Tfoot75 · 21/08/2020 15:52

I had a 3a tear, healed well. Had my 2nd 3 years later, the consultant said there was a 10% chance of same happening again and was happy to release me to midwife led care, I had another 3a tear, again healed well though not quite as well as 1st time.

I don't plan to have any more children but if I did I think I'd go for a section as I wouldn't want to take the risk again just in case it was worse. I don't regret the decision to have 2nd natural labour at all though.

swisherfisher · 21/08/2020 15:56

I had a 3b tear. Recovery was not remotely fun. Everything was pretty much back to normal after a year.

But no way was I doing more damage to my fanjo.

So I had an elective section and it was brilliant. Yes there were risks and it was.major surgery but the recovery was a lot lot lot easier.

Highly recommend it.

SBAM · 21/08/2020 16:18

I had a 3b tear with my first after a forceps delivery. Although I healed well I chose an elective section for the second time and was happy with my decision as he was 9lb10!

SBAM · 21/08/2020 16:22

I should say, consultants said the risk of it happening again was very small, but it was a risk I wasn’t willing to take. I looked at the RCOG information sheets about likelihood of tears etc to help make my decision. Although my midwives completely backed my decision I had to see a consultant a few times and they only confirmed the c-section at 32 weeks and booked a date around 35 weeks (I was then pushed back due to a scheduling issue so he was born on his due date, they usually do it in the 39th week)

LabiaMinoraPissusFlapus · 21/08/2020 16:23

I had a third degree tear with my third birth. I had another natural birth and that was fine, but I knew it was a smaller baby when pregnant so wasn't worried.

DuckonaBike · 21/08/2020 16:27

I had a 3rd degree tear and displaced coccyx with my first baby. Had my second 2.5 years later and had only a 2nd degree tear. Both healed well. I didn’t get the impression there was a particular risk of it happening again because it happened the first time, but it’s probably worth discussing with the midwife.

angelofthelight · 21/08/2020 16:28

Third degree tear with my first. Had my second 14 months later naturally and then a third 3.5 years later and also no problems.

DinosApple · 21/08/2020 16:34

3rd degree tear, gave birth again 17 months later via elective C-section. Recovering from the section was a walk in the park by comparison.

Had no trouble at all requesting it, or getting it authorized. I found once I got to 30 weeks plus I started to panic about the birth. The consultant had a reputation for being quite severe, but she was fine and accepted I didn't want to risk a repeat, or further damage.

Equimum · 21/08/2020 16:36

Hi, I had a 3rd degree tear with my first and a horrendous recovery. TBH, it’s a miracle we had a second, because I was always in discomfort for a couple of days after DTD and couldn’t imagine how I’d deliver another one. As it happened, I was lucky and conceived DC2 on our first attempt. We discussed the options and a midwife said that sometimes the stretching from delivering another baby helped to heal the issues from the original tear. DC2 was born naturally with 2nd degree tearing, which healed really quickly, and as suggested, actually made everything feel more ‘normal again’.

Good luck with whatever you decide.

JoJoNE · 24/09/2020 13:29

Hi everyone, pleased i found this discussion, I’m having a really hard time deciding on my birth plan for baby no4. I had a 3rd degree time each time I gave birth to my other children healing and recovery was fine just feel I have a weaker pelvic floor this time round. I had considered c section before but always opted for vaginal delivery as I understood the low chance it would happen again but then it happened every time and I feel a bit traumatised by birth no3. I just don’t want to make the wrong decision as I keep thinking maybe this time it’ll be ok, but with 3, 3rd degree tears under my belt it seems safer to opt for the C section I’m just worried about being able to look after my other kids take them to school etc my youngest is 2.5 yrs old, other kids are 5 and 8. Husband is self employed so he can take 2 weeks off max as he has no paternity support and my mum could help the week after but then I might be on my own after that. I’m encouraged that a few people said the c section recovery was ok. Any thoughts/comments very welcome :) thanks

BogRollBOGOF · 24/09/2020 13:53

Two DCs
Birth 1: EMCS after a long, spontaneous labour and fruitlessly trying to push out back to back DS1 for 2 hours. Ended up in HDU for 36 hours with various complications. Slow recovery, very weak, couldn't carry baby up/ down stairs for first 3 weeks as I needed both hands for stability ( not helped by months of inactivity due to unidentified SPD)

Birth 2: VBAC. Rushed to theatre as baby's heart rate was hard to monitor. Toss up between forceps or a tricky EMCS. Pushed him out with forceps on my final attempt causing 3rd degree tear.

Tear buggered up my SPD. Had to crawl on the stairs because of poor mobility. Didn't leave the house for a month due to the laxitives. Mobility still impaired 3 months later when I still couldn't walk up hill.

I never did get to DC3, partly because two difficult pregnancies & births in two years meant my poor pelvis really needed a break and then that ship sailed.
Medically with my two experiences of EMCS and "sucessful" difficult VBAC I would have an open choice. I would choose ELCS, largely to protect my pelvis.

Original poster

MrsJoJangles · 09/03/2021 10:23

Hi everyone. Firstly thank you for sharing your experiences. It really helped me build some confidence to try for another child and I am now 6 months pregnant after reading everyones posts and doing some research i have decided (for now) to opt for an elective c section. No matter which website i go to, most women who have experienced extensive tearing seem to say that a c section was a little easier to recover from so im hoping its the same for me! Any more advice or stories that people could share, mainly on experiences of c sections, i would really love to hear. I must admit, i am pretty terrified at the thought of it!! Xx

OP posts:

girlmumoftwo · 22/03/2021 01:31

Hello! Just wanted to wish you all the best.

I gave birth 6 weeks ago, had episiotomy and 3a tear. I’m still in quite some pain. How long did your recovery take?

Imisscheese · 22/03/2021 02:21

Hi, I've had a C section after an emergency C section first time round. It was a great experience. Really calm and relaxed, my son was placed on me and I had cuddles after a quick check. Recovery was great, within a couple of days I could walk a short distance (few hundred metres) and after a couple of weeks I felt completely fine. Not being able to drive is a pain. My obstetrician said that I could have a tidy scar if I asked for one since it was my last. I highly recommend asking, it made a huge difference to my scar.

I hope it all goes brilliantly. Good luck!

Original poster

MrsJoJangles · 22/03/2021 10:38

Girlmumoftwo im so sorry you have also experienced a 3rd degree tear. I hope your recovery is much quicker than mine. Im sorry I cant be any more positive but I was in pain for months and didnt feel like i had nearly recovered until around 9 months after. Fingers crossed this isnt the same for you.

Imisscheese I am so glad to hear your experience. Particularly that you could walk after a few days. I definitely think, while recovery will be tough, it will hopefully be easier than what I have previously been through. Your story is very reassuring. Thank you x

OP posts:

Original poster

MrsJoJangles · 22/03/2021 10:40

Also, shouldnt they give you a tidy scar anyway if they can? It sounds crazy if you have to ask! Otherwise do they just butcher you without a care? I will defo bear this in mind but I cant believe people should even have to ask this! I will be mentioning it so thank you for the heads up x

OP posts:

girlmumoftwo · 22/03/2021 11:13

Thank you! I really hope so too! It’s just been so hard. I had a traumatic first birth as well which made me fall into depression. I feel like I’m heading that way this time around too because of how much pain and discomfort I’m in. I still cannot walk properly or sit. Nothing feels the same down there and I’m living on stool softeners.

Original poster

MrsJoJangles · 22/03/2021 13:28

Oh god lactulose. I literally had to limit this because it actually worked too well so I ended up in agony with my tear and then that awful stuff meant i barely left the bathroom for the first few days! I do think I too probably went through some sort of mental health dip but I have always been too proud to admit it to anyone I know. Was there any reason you didnt opt for an ELCS after a 1st traumatic birth? I really feel for you as reading things like how you cant sit etc makes me remember how awful it all was. I really do sympathise xx

OP posts:

girlmumoftwo · 23/03/2021 02:51

My first was an emergency c section which I wanted to avoid. I heard so many people advise that recovery from a vaginal birth is easier. If I had my mind now, I would have opted for an electrode c section. It’s nice to know that I’m not alone that there is light at the end of the tunnel and god knows how long that tunnel will be.

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