Who is going to employ a 40-something, burnt out academic?

[NoWorkInProgress]

How have I ended up with almost no work? My days are so dull and dire. I feel I’m wasting my life away. There must SOMEONE out there who would employ me?

I have a degree & PhD in Psychology. I drifted into it, and ended up as in a senior position as a lecturer in a good university after a few years as a postdoc. I struggled a lot in academia. My ex worked full time, too, and I was juggling kids. Plus I have ASD, it was a difficult environment. So I quit my post and reconceptualised it - did freelance work. This was successful for several years and the short term contracts suited me well. I gave a lot of tutorials, ran courses on a short term contracts, taught online, and even got involved in some creative projects involving various charities. It was great while the DCs were growing up.

Fast forward a few years. I’m divorced, my DCs are teens, and I’m left with the online work only. I am too worn out to give lectures. I can’t keep up with the new research, and it feels like a performance art that I can’t do any more. My online work is not fulfilling any more. It’s the same thing every term. I run it with my eyes shut.

How do I get out of this? I am panicking. I did a counselling course a few years ago, but it’s not for me. I can’t afford to retrain. I’ve applied for non research posts at local universities but get nowhere with those.

I am now pretty distressed! Who is going to employ a 40-something, burnt out academic of yesteryear?!!

Has anyone else been in my position? I’m so scared.

@MedSchoolRat

Thank you for the kick up the backside! I was trying to explain to a PP why I’m not good at the research side of academia. I really did manage the statistics thing with various strategies, and had a v patient OhD supervisor who helped me do the right stats. Not needed much since then, as I worked in a team after that.

Yes, I need to start seeing opportunities. Thank you for the suggestion re. CV. Yes, might contact a careers counsellor at a university. I will read through the suggestion N’s on here again, too.

Thank you for encouragement!

I'm having a mid-life career crisis too and I'm reading a really interesting book called 'Design Your Life' by Bill Burnett and Dave Evans. It's given me lots of useful food for thought - might be worth a look.

I'm not sure what you can do but I had 3 sessions with a life/career coach recently trying to give me insights in what I wanted to do etc.

For what I really want to do I need unlimited money but it gave me the push that if I really wanted to I could study.

I did a DISC and another similar test to the Myers Briggs. They can pinpoint again your strengths, weaknesses and where you'd be best suited working, studying to retrain etc.

Just reading your posts, and wondering if you have come across autistic burnout/ autistic shutdown? A few of our posts about losing interest etc really stood out in relation to this. Also, autistic/ adhd inertia. I am also autistic- diagnosed about a year and a half ago- and I go through periods of this. Can you afford to take a short sabbatical? Or get a very basic job with repetitive tasks- when I finished my degree (years ago now) I was burnt out so worked in a shop and then in a call centre for a while which helped me to reset the tired part of my brain. Then I returned to my career roles refreshed. Which sounds strange on paper but the old adage 'A change is as good as a rest' really came into play for me.

@NoWorkInProgress

Thanks Egghead68

I’m not sure about any more online work. I’m fed up with opening my laptop everyday, and feel like I’m suffering from a lack of physical interaction with others. However, I don’t want to sound negative, and this work sounds interesting! I wonder where I’d find out more. Do psychologists need PAs? I wasn’t really aware but it’s not my area.

You could complement this with a side business such as selling crafts/books/whatever you are interested in on eBay/Etsy etc or training as a keep-fit instructor or something

Thanks for these suggestions. Although they sound like good ways of topping up an income, I don’t really like using eBay or Etsy, and would be utterly rubbish as in anything sporty.

I guess I want to have a “normal” life where I can go out to work, do something satisfying, and come home. My kids will be at university come the autumn and the thought of being left at home with my laptop fills me with dread.

A lot of psychiatrists have PAs, it's often useful to target the area you have background knowledge of because they will appreciate having a PA that understands their line of work.

Saying that, the top paying PA roles are really working for corporate lawyers, bankers, Executives, etc.

Thanks Requinblanc

I’ll have a think about the third sector. Ideally I’d like to be away from MH issues but charity work might be appealing.

Yes - this is also a concern, that jobs will become harder to find given COVID.

I am considering the online work my “part time” thing until I land on my feet. I did apply for a couple of admin posts, but didn’t get shortlisted.

It is encouraging to hear that I am not alone!
Good luck with your search, sorry you’re in the same position

@BatleyTownswomensGuild

I'm having a mid-life career crisis too and I'm reading a really interesting book called 'Design Your Life' by Bill Burnett and Dave Evans. It's given me lots of useful food for thought - might be worth a look.

Thanks for the recommendation! I’ll have a look...

I'm adding in a link for Women Returners as although you have been in work freelance, you may well qualify for some of the programmes offered.

They also offer a lot of advice on CV's, LinkedIn pages and interview technique. The conference I attended just gave me hope, sitting in a room with hundreds of well qualified women in the same position.

Might be worth a look. I think it's free to join and then you pay for seminars and conferences.

It might be your move to a corporate world.

womenreturners.com/

Could you use your language skills and run small club type group sessions for children after school in primary schools? This can be quite lucrative.

I moved from journalism to doing admin in a large secondary school and after a couple of months got involved in marketing the school. It's my main focus now and I love where I work. I still have to do some pretty mundane admin as part of the job but I don't mind that as the people I work with are so lovely. I missed that interaction when WFH.

Where do you live OP?

I don't have any real suggestions - but come on OP you can do it - I'm mid 40s (when the fuck did that happen - I swear last time I checked I was 20 something) and I got burnt out teaching in schools and went back to uni and I'm in the middle of a Speech and Language Therapy degree and I am bloody loving it!

I hear you on the online learning stuff though - it's a shit situation for everyone.

@friskybivalves

Thank you for posting about the Civil Service. It sounds like they are exciting times! I must admit, it sounds daunting and overwhelming. Is it something I could do with my ASD?

I will have a proper think through, and will look at the application process.

It really helps to know about the filters and levels, so thank you!

@NoWorkInProgress

AutumnLeavesSeptember

How about becoming a user experience person, or a user researcher?

This sounds great! I wonder how I go about finding this sort of role? I love the idea of something so analytical and involving problem-solving. This sounds very exciting!

OK so sounds like I should contact specialist recruiters. At risk of sounding stupid, do you know who they would be? I’m guessing I can just Google “user researcher” and “recruitment”... will try this.

No, I don’t think I want to be in any other strand of psychology. Time for a change!

Thanks for the suggestion, and also for luck! I wish you every success

Do you have a profile on LinkedIn? If not, then first step is to get set up on LinkedIn and add some connections of people you've worked with (so that your profile looks 'genuine' and not like a weird scammer!)

What I would then suggest is for each type of role you're interested in you:

• Ask friends and family (or even on here) if anyone knows someone that does the job you're potentially interested in that might be willing to spare 30 mins to talk to you about it

• Search on LinkedIn for women doing the job you're interested in and add them as a connection with a little note to say

"Hi...I'm just looking to expand my network in XYZ area as I'm considering a career change. It would be great to connect with you."

• Once you've added some connections in the relevant area message a few of them with a polite message along the lines of

"Hi Xxxx,

Thank you so much for accepting my connection request.

I'm sorry to message you out of the blue, as I said I'm looking at making a career change and I'm really interested in XYZ role.

As you can imagine though it's hard to get a sense of what the role is really like day-to-day from the 'outside' and whether I would be suited to it and vice versa.

I was wondering if you would be willing to spare 30mins for a virtual coffee? I would love to hear a little bit about how you got into the role, what your average day is like and what sort of person you think it suits.

Absolutely no problem if you don't have time, I realise it's odd to get a request like this out of the blue!

Best wishes,

Autumn

• Try and get at least 3 virtual coffees lined up for each role you're interested in

• Prepare questions in advance that will give you a good insight into the role and whether it's for you

People always think no-one will respond or take the time out to have these virtual coffees but you'll be surprised at how nice the average person is (especially the average woman)

[quote Walkaround]**@NoWorkInProgress* - how important is flexibility and time to explore/rediscover unpaid interests that give your life meaning; how important is income (does your current online teaching not give you sufficient income, or is the greater problem the boredom and lack of challenge?); how important is novelty in the role? Eg would teaching the teachers, or training rather than lecturing be too similar? What do* you still enjoy that you would want to retain in any new role?[/quote]
@Walkaround
Great questions! I will reflect. Current online work pays I sufficiently but also is repetitive now. I need a change. I think that means a change from teaching anyone anything, too!

Try this book to start working on imposter syndrome...

Ditching Imposter Syndrome https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/1908854979/ref=cmswwrcppapiii_3BJpFb77MGCC8

Wow, @wheresmymojo
HUGE thanks for taking the time to advise on all this. Yes, I do have a profile on LinkedIn, but clearly have been using it incorrectly.

This is interesting. I hadn’t considered using it so proactively. I must admit, I’ve received those sorts of messages but haven’t been able to help much. It’s a great idea!

Thanks for taking the time to go through this with me.

I’m in a similar position! And even older than you. So you are not alone. Don’t panic. There are several options but I’d advise just having a break for now. Doing anything else that doesn’t cause you so much stress but keep up one thing that you loved about your academic life, even if it’s unpaid the odd article, attend an online seminar.

You just sound worn out at the moment. But you’ve done really well to reinvent yourself so it shows you have many skills, tenacity and drive. Most would not have made the leap from paid work to self employed in academia it’s really hard. So well done for that honestly I haven’t been able to make that transition.

Take a break. Even working in the local shop. Then reassess.

Just wanted to send solidarity, OP. I left academia last year after seven years post-PhD of lecturing and research contracts (none permanent). I also got lots of people (outside academia!) telling me that of course I would have loads of amazing opportunities available to me, I had a PhD... We both know that it doesn't work like that! Which isn't to say that you won't find a great and interesting job, but just to say that I understand that it isn't actually as easy to turn great academic credentials into employability as a lot of people think. I think what will really help you, aside from the fact that your subject is more 'real world' than mine, is that you've run your own business and had that experience.

I've moved into professional services in a university and it isn't my absolute dream job, but it's reasonably interesting, I get paid roughly the same as I did in academic positions with a lot more security and much shorter hours and, if I'm honest, I like the fact that no one expects me to put on a performance about how academic quality is my life's work and one and only driving passion. I had so much imposter syndrome in academia but looking back it was not just about not feeling good enough, it was also that deep down I knew that, compared to many of my peers, I just didn't actually want it that much, and I thought my subject was interesting but not the most important thing in the world. I do think that universities, for obvious reasons, are more likely to recognise academic work experience and think it 'counts' than other employers, especially private sector: many of my friends found that they were being assessed essentially as if they had no employment history because employers felt that years of lecturing and research wasn't 'working in the real world'. My current employer made it clear that they thought my experience was really valuable and useful to them.

leafeater

I'm adding in a link for Women Returners

Thank you so much. Looks very helpful

@testingtesting101

I think you might be overlooking the impact ASD has on women as we age. I am in a very, very similar position to you... you mention burnout etc. and this becomes cumulative (lots of mini breakdowns, depression, anxiety for instance) over time.... especially when you factor in parenting, possible hormonal issues etc.

I have stepped down from an incredible career, most people really can't understand why. It's hard for me to explain or understand why and I have considered imposter syndrome too.

However, I am now pausing and trying to really understand how and why my neurodiversity (only very recently realised) affects all areas of my life and I am determined to restructure my future life in a way that places my needs at the centre and plays to my strengths and most of all reduces my stressors. It is a very delicate balance and not easy to unpick.

I honestly think before you jump into something else, you need to really take stock of how you need to be, to live so that you can thrive, then start looking at work which fits the picture (regardless of the industry it is in).

I really hope you (and I!) find new paths.

I'm wondering if you had a sense of purpose and growth in your previous role?

We have certain fundamental human needs and two of those are to have a sense of purpose and to feel that we are growing.

If we don't fulfil these needs we'll often struggle with stress and depression without being able to pinpoint exactly what's causing it.

Basically I specifically work with women who want to leave a professional or corporate job because they have this sense of lack of purpose and/or having no room to grow and most of them would describe having the feelings you have now.

It's also my own background, I left a six figure job (as the main breadwinner) because I was becoming very stressed even though I was perfectly capable of the work and the workload, while very high, was no worse than it had been in my 20s.

There was very little help available for this feeling of 'I know I want a job where I feel more fulfilled but I have no idea what I want to do' back then so I had to do a lot of research, figuring things out and using some of my management consulting frameworks on myself.

And that's how my work and programme was born basically.

The keys are:

• Getting to know yourself again: what do you love? What energises you?

• Understanding your values and what drives you

• Understanding your personality and key natural strengths

• Identifying what 'causes' you feel really passionate about

Then seeing how these can be combined in different ways to give you one job (or several revenue streams).

It's bloody hard work to do it on your own though but not impossible!

[quote NoWorkInProgress]@whiteroseredrose

I can’t really afford a career coach at the moment, as I’ve already scaled back. I ‘downsized’ from my lecturing post to this freelance one, and as a single parent of 3 DCs I can’t scale back any further now. I need to get earning! But yes, of course that means having a happy life, is possible![/quote]
OP...

I can occasionally offer a free space on my programme (it's the joy of working for myself and having no-one to answer to!).

I think you would really benefit from it.

It's a very structured process to figure out who you are and what direction you should take and then it helps you take that direction.

The only catch would be that you'd have to be willing to commit to putting in the effort and showing up to the coaching calls as though you'd paid the usual £1500 fee (it can be easy to undervalue things that are free) and that I get a testimonial from you when you've finished (unless you think it's crap ).

PM me if you think it would be useful and we can have a chat over Zoom about it.

My website is youcanthrivecoaching.com if you want to take a look - the programme is under 'How I Can Help -> Purpose Driven Career Programme'

Hi OP

Reading your profile a few suggestions come to mind :
Becoming a Sen officer (at a local council)... These are the people who write ehcp plans for children who have Sen, anything from ASD to serious emotional needs. There are still quite a lot of these jobs about even now, the pay isn't bad although it can be stressful. Because you have ASD yourself you would be able to relate to a lot of what the kids are going through, it involves trawling through lots of documents. You don't need retraining to do this but I advise researching the role and a good interview you have a good chance :)

Have you considered advertising or marketing? I've got a friend who works creating promotions for large firms. I don't know where you live but I could send a link across.

And finally, what about something in I. T? I know someone who works at a helpdesk for a firm trying to fix computers. They train you (for free), the money starts pants but gets much better and it's extremely ASD friendly.

Hope these help 😊

Also, as a fellow probably ASD imho there are two sides to this:

• it is good to take ourselves seriously, and ponder our particular anxieties, difficulties.
• I don’t think it’s good to focus on ASD as ‘the only thing’ or it being negative, or a reason to escape challenge in our lives, we are all individuals bound up with traits which can be helpful and unhelpful. It may well have been ASD traits that helped you in the first place.

Cleaning, gardening, dog walking?
Helping hoarders?
Delivery driver?

This is so incredibly kind, wheresmymojo
If you don’t mind, I would like to not “come out” for now, but I will give your offer something serious thought. I am very grateful for your generosity! HUGE thanks

Thank you all SO much for your suggestions and offers. I promise I have read every single one, but I have to stop individual replies as need to concentrate on family life. I feel bad about not replying to each and every post! A massive thank you I didn’t expect such a flurry of kind responses!