Is this such an awful thing to do

[FinnyStory]

DH goes into hospital for an operation tomorrow. He's expected to be there 10 days.

Last night, I went for a (socially distanced, outdoor) bike ride with some friends/acquaintances. They mentioned a pub outing this Friday and asked if I'd like to join them, as I'll be at a lose end with DH in hospital - no visiting allowed.

I've said , I'll have to wait and see what's what after the op, if I'm needed etc, but on the face of it, yes I'd love to, it will be good to have something to keep be occupied.

DH agrees I should go, no issues at all, but a couple of other friends I've mentioned it to think it's really off that I'd go out having fun while DH is in hospital.

Is it?

Sorry, so as not to drip feed, I should mention that I'm middle aged and female, these are all men of similar age or slightly younger. 2 single, one in long term relationship, if that makes a difference.

Not at all op. You're not able to visit him so absolutely go out with your friends!

Of course you can go and enjoy yourself. What a strange thing to say! Are you supposed to stay home alone for 10 days?

Do it. You will need to occupy yourself, might as well be in good company.

Make the most of it and enjoy yourself !

Thank you! I think it was the fact that they are men that bothered my other friends

As long as you are not planning to get gang banged in a field, I'm sure it's fine!

Why would you not be self isolating? That’s what people do when they have a relative in hospital or due home. I would have assumed anyone would do that automatically. How would you live with yourself if you infected a vulnerable partner when they returned from hospital? How could you ever sleep at night knowing you took that risk, even if you didn’t infect him. People I know with partners/parents even close friends in hospital are self isolating as a matter of course. No one has even once considered doing otherwise

@FinnyStory

Thank you! I think it was the fact that they are men that bothered my other friends

You harlot, OP, enjoying yourself with other men while your wounded soldier is in hospital

Seriously. Go and have fun. Much better than sitting at home on your own missing your DP.

@Clive222

Why would you not be self isolating? That’s what people do when they have a relative in hospital or due home. I would have assumed anyone would do that automatically. How would you live with yourself if you infected a vulnerable partner when they returned from hospital? How could you ever sleep at night knowing you took that risk, even if you didn’t infect him. People I know with partners/parents even close friends in hospital are self isolating as a matter of course. No one has even once considered doing otherwise

There's nothing in any guidance anywhere that says that the families of hospital patients need to self isolate before or after the operation, although we have done our best and avoided unecessary contact beforehand. Neither DS nor I can expect to take the time off work, for example, but thanks for adding an extra layer of worry.

@Clive222

Why would you not be self isolating? That’s what people do when they have a relative in hospital or due home. I would have assumed anyone would do that automatically. How would you live with yourself if you infected a vulnerable partner when they returned from hospital? How could you ever sleep at night knowing you took that risk, even if you didn’t infect him. People I know with partners/parents even close friends in hospital are self isolating as a matter of course. No one has even once considered doing otherwise

My local area hasn’t had a case in weeks and weeks. We need stop living with this just incase mentality. Enjoy the pub OP

You need some new friends!

Go and have fun!

@RockingMyFiftiesNot

You need some new friends!

This has become apparent

They say it's times like this you find out who your friends are. I have two separate groups of "acquaintances" who have been absolutely brilliant. My good friends have done a lot of saying "we're here if you need us" but not much action.