Help me overcome my fear of driving please!

[quantumdog]

Please help, I'm struggling so badly with driving and my nerves.
I was a fairly competent driver, but when my ex stole my car and crashed it whilst under the influence I subsequently went 16 months without a vehicle. I've just been gifted a lovely beetle to get myself and 3 DC about in, but for some reason I appear to have slid back in to the mindset of a brand new driver. I barely leave our little town because the anxiety of driving is too much to bear. And now my children are picking up on this, as DS7 has started crying and panicking about Mummy crashing whenever we have to get in the car.
This has resulted in me becoming almost paralysed with fear and repeatedly stalling at junctions. It's mortifying and I'm terrified of stalling on a roundabout or something and causing an accident.
Please help me. How do I overcome this feeling that I'm not competent or safe on our roads?

How about some refresher lessons? You'll feel better with someone who also has mirrors and pedals.

I second the above, I’d get some refresher lessons just to get your confidence back. Would be handy to drive without the pressure and worry from the kids in the car just to get yourself used to it.

Thank you, yes, I think that my DS7's reactions whenever we get in the car and stressing me out beyond belief.
I now have nightmares about causing big collisions. 😞 Part of me feels I should give up, but the other side of me refuses to be defeated.
I'm struggling financially at the moment, but will get some refresher lessons booked in as soon as possible. How many hours do you think I'd need? As I said, I was a good driver before my hiatus and the nerves set in.

Agree that either lessons or maybe swapping for an automatic car? Could do a few drives without DC in the car so you can practice in peace?

Refresher lessons are great. The other thing I found is to drive every day, even if it's just around the block. And switch to an automatic if you can, so much easier.

Refresher lessons are a terrific idea. Also you could consider the IAM's advanced driver courses. They teach you stuff that isn't on the regular lessons/test and it can help you feel more confident.

Also, I would say give yourself a break. The Beetle (I'm assuming you mean a new shape one, from the late 90s onwards) can feel like an odd car to drive initially. I used to have one myself. I loved it, but you do feel oddly far back in the driving seat, the dashboard feels massive, and it can take a bit of getting used to. Once you get the hang of it, though, it's a great thing. I used to love bimbling about in mine. It always felt very safe and planted on the road. (Mine was dark grey, with cream leather inside, and I used to keep sprigs of lavender in the flower holder thingy.)

Refresher lessons are a fab idea.

I booked some for my son after he was in a crash, and even just two lessons in was able to remind him of all the necessities (and calm my fear).