If you and your OH have totally different taste in decor and style, what did you do about it when you began living together?

[ComtesseDeSpair]

Just that really. DP and I are moving in together. Have been browsing furniture.

He has terrible taste.

Even if I’m being charitable, it is taste that is very very different to mine. (I know my taste is good because the last two flats I’ve sold, the buyers have asked to buy some of the furniture as well )

I’m all for compromise in a relationship and I want him to feel like it’s his home as well: for a range of reasons the house belongs solely to me and I know he already feels a bit useless and that he isn’t contributing - I don’t want to compound this by blocking all his choices and essentially saying “this is MY house and I’LL decide what we have in it.”

But I also don’t want to be miserable because the living room looks like a student flatshare full of mismatching items!

How have couples here compromised on stuff like this?

I was going to say that I choose everything and that is true but at the same time I think that we have very similar taste. I have more time and inclination so I do tend to choose things.

This sounds a bit up myself but I have a bit of an eye for interior design, others comment on it, inc when we have sold houses, and my husband really doesn’t have an eye for it.

He tends to let me lead, he will give his opinion and tends to love whatever I do and I involve him in decisions so we pick together but the reality is it’s ultimately my choice.

I think some folks have a creative side and they can imagine the end result and how stuff works together and others simply can’t see it, for them it’s about the individual piece and functionality.

I think I’d say oh that’s nice, what about this and then sell it’s plus points, how it will fit in with x, and give him a range of options you like and let him think it was his choice, rather than no that’s horrid we will have this instead.

We divided it up. He gets say on some areas, I do on others.

We never buy anything we don’t both love.

I let a lamp slip in but hated it so I got the cat to knock it over. Took 3 goes because it was sturdier than I thought but dh couldn’t be cross with the cat.

What exactly are your respective tastes? Sometimes, it's possible to combine the two in a slightly different way that makes both of you happy.

My XH (or his bloody mother) generally stropped, sulked and tantrummed until I'd had enough and let them get their way...all very gentleman's club, meets old colonial and neither of them had the vaguest iota of what colours/patterns went together.

My home now is full of colour, pop art and fairy lights. He'd probably spontaneously combust if he ever had to stay here !

From what I can gather his new partner's taste is just as appalling as his.

DP makes a big deal of asking me what I would like whenever we decorate/but new stuff. After many years together I say what's the point, we'll end up doing what you want anyway. Then he throws a strop about how unreasonable I'm being so I relent and give him my opinions. Then he says we're not doing that and we do what he wants