Twins refusing to eat

[Laurenk474]

Hi all, looking for any advice in how to get my twins to eat meals. They will be one next week, and every day I have to fight with them to eat meals. This has been going on for about 3 months now, I don't think it's just lack of appetite due to teething.

They will take breakfast in the morning and then just turn away at the sight of a spoon the remainder of the day. I've tried making all sorts of meals, jars, plain potatoe etc etc. They still take 2 bottles each during the night as they are hungry .

Doing my head in now fighting and fighting them every day. A year of sleepless nights.... ready to crack up!

@Subordinateclause

Mine was definitely on mainly finger food at that age, although didn't eat huge amounts. I remember a discussion about how so many babies spoon refuse from not long after weaning, and the consensus was babies were spoon feeding was much more of a 'thing' in the past when babies weaned at 3 or 4 months. Aren't most of your friends with babies doing finger foods or letting the babies use spoons themselves? Just plonk some food on the high chair and leave them to it.

I agree it's quite unusual at 12mo to be exclusively spoon feeding at mealtimes. If they're feeding themselves snacks then they understand the concept of self feeding - make them meals to feed themselves and leave them to it. Don't expect them to eat huge meals straight away but they won't learn unless you give them a chance

If they’re having more than occasional snacks, they probably just aren’t hungry enough. Try cutting them right down, or out.

2 bottles during the night will probably mean they’re not nearly hungry enough for a reasonable breakfast. It will be hard to break that habit I know, but could you gradually reduce the amount?

Oh it's so hard for you. My DS was always a good eater but he ate much better if he could feed himself. He loved dippy eggs and bread or small sandwiches and yogurt. Do they eat better if they are distracted? Would they be interested in dippy eggs or fish fingers or other finger food? He also drank a mad amount of milk and didn't sleep through the night ... grr

I think you need to go cold turkey on the night time milk. A bit before bed maybe but just a small sippy cup ( they shouldn't be having bottles at this age anyway). If they wake give them a sip of water and a dummy if necessary. It may be hard the first few nights but they will start to eat at meal times. Stop snacks 2 hours before meal times and keep these rigid so they know food is coming. Good luck.

The reason they are not eating anything is simple - you give them two bottles during the night.

Either you continue and they’ll always stay the same OR you could reduce/go cold turkey on them with night feeds. I had to do this with DS and it wasn’t pleasant for three nights but he soon got used to it and slept through/hungry in the day.

You can do it! They are nearly one and will understand... be firm.

My twins used to refuse to eat their food but would eat off my plate. So for a while I just did one big plate and put it in the middle of us and they helped themselves (not sure what age but they were little). Also gave them their own spoons very early on so they could try to feed themselves, lots of finger food. Also do you eat with them? That seemed to help as they’ll copy what we do. Good luck x

Maybe a combination of spoon and ginger food will help. Ie at breakfast tomorrow you could give them both a bit of toast and hard scrambled egg so it’s easier to pick up. Then offer a bit of yogurt on the spoon as well. Then you also have time to eat your own breakfast

Hi, I have twin boys who are 24 months old now. They were similar to your twins at that age. At their one year review the health visitor asked me if they were sleeping through yet and I said no as they were still waking for 2 bottles a night. She suggested weaning them off which we did successfully by gradually watering the milk down by an ounce every few nights until it was just water. Took a couple of weeks.
I found their appetite increased after that too. We also used a mix of spoon feeding and finger foods. Like others have said, eating our meals together as a family and making it a social time helped. The division of responsibility helped me lots too as it took the stress out of mealtimes. I also started enjoying cooking meals for all of us. Would recommend the Baby Led Weaning cookbook. The book War and peas was a good read too about how to tackle fussy eating. They eat a range of foods now and I'm not worried about how much they eat as that varies from day to day. Also we kept snacks fairly light like fruit to make sure they were hungry at mealtimes.
On a different note, one of my boys started sleeping through at 18 months and the other has only just started sleeping through. It's great when you all get proper sleep and it will happen eventually so hang in there. Good luck with it all!

It is night time milk but also get them feeding themselves and don’t feed them I remember DS eating his Christmas pudding and custard at 9 months on his first Christmas day, got a bit messy but he enjoyed it.

My two were both probably 95% milk and 5% food at that point. It is quite normal I think.

My main piece of advice would be stop fighting. Just offer them food, and leave it up to them whether they eat it.

I'd move towards more of them feeding themselves (ive yet to come across anything babies can't eat with their hands, and that includes yoghurt). It does sound like they're potentially getting all the calories they need from snacks and milk though so maybe ease off the snacks?