Newborn not going back to sleep- tips?

[VanishingHalf]

Does anyone have any tips for this? Our newborn (almost 5 weeks old) feeds around these times at night: 9pm, midnight, 4am, 7.30am. He wakes naturally for the midnight, 4am and 7.30 (the times fluctuate slightly within about 30mins either side but so far he has been pretty "regular"). The last couple of nights, after the 4am feed he has been wide awake and alert and cried the house down as soon as you try to put him in his cot. We have tried pretty much everything to soothe him but to no avail. He's not sleepy. He's happy sitting up next to me and DH but as soon as you lie him down he's crying and screaming, kicking etc.
In normal times I would swaddle him and this often works well to calm him, but at the moment the heat is unbearable and I'm wary to use a swaddle. He's sleeping in his nappy only and it's still absolutely baking in the bedroom even with multiple going.

By the way I know this might be a normal phase for newborns so we might just have to tolerate it. Or it might be to do with the heat?

I know some people will suggest co-sleeping but I just can't reconcile it with myself. I've looked at the Lullaby Trust and NCT guidelines repeatedly but can't get comfortable with it and feel scared one of us would accidentally smother him or that he'd roll off the side of the bed. Respect to those for whom this works but it's not for us.

So aside from co-sleeping, are there any tips that might help him get back to sleep? We've been awake since 3.30am last few days and would really like us all to get more sleep tonight.

Perfectly normal. Get yourself a podcast to listen to or a book. Don't engage with him massively - low level light and limit noise and he will eventually get the idea that nigh time = sleep time. It may take a long while though.

I don't really remember those early weeks as I was shattered but I think you just need to ride it out really. My memory is hazy but sometimes they just have their awake times and it could be his until he gets used to day and night properly. Very annoying for you I know but could one of you take him so the other sleeps and then swap. I say this but my DP was useless and never did the nights. Other than that sing and sway in your arms until he is asleep and put down. I seem to remember quite often watching TV series in the early hours.

I felt exactly the same about co sleeping. I used to get awful nightmares about it and always put DS down in his crib if I felt I was going to fall asleep. I'd rather him cry than the alternative.

Thanks @Trashtara but I don't like the idea of just letting him cry hysterically for ages without comforting him?

Sounds normal for a newborn.

Keep the lights low and have feed and cuddle. Get yourself a good book or podcast to read.

You can take it in turns or go to bed a bit earlier.

My second would often wake for a feed at 5. That is when I get up anyway so one of us would hold her while the other showered and got ready for the day

@VanishingHalf NOOOO! That is not what I was suggesting! I was suggesting you read a book or listened to a pod cast (or watched TV on low volume) whilst cuddling him!

By don't engage with him massively, I meant don't try and play with him - shake teddy at him, make faces, tickle him etc. But definitely cuddle him, pat him, rock him whatever you do to comfort him.

When my little one was like that I used to change her nappy before feed not after, I would put the torch on my phone but facing away from us. Didn't interest with her at all. After her feed I used to cuddle for 10 mins then slowly lay her back in her next to me crib and gently pay her chest till she was asleep again.
I also used white noise this also helped.
She was sleeping through from 8 weeks. Good luck

Thanks @Trashtara for the clarification!