Starting school wisdom

[Merename]

Eldest starts next week. Please save me time and emotional wear and tear by educating me with your wisdom and tips?

All of it, but I am wondering about lunches - should I take the chance to encourage her to have school meals now so I don’t have to make them? Or will this just be dictated by what her pals do?

Morning routine help?!

I would definitely try with school dinners especially if they are free. Most kids in my classes reception - year 2 had them.

Mine usually went to childminder in morning as i had to catch a train but i would get up, washed, dressed etc then gets kids up. Feed breakfast and then hair and teeth.

Name it, name it and name it again.
Lower your expectations to the question ‘What did you do at school today?’ There are generally two answers; nothing, or I can’t remember!
If letters require a reply slip or something do it straight away and return to book bag.
Keep a supply of change ready for mufti day, cake sale, etc

I saw somewhere you can get a 'School Mums Diary' with hints and tips. We're not yet at that stage but I've mentally bookmarked it for the future!

Label everything.

School dinners definitely! Always check the book bag, treat it as very important and put things in it like reading book, permission slip straight away. If you want to wash PE kit do it at the weekend, so leave it hanging up in school all week. These things will insure your dd has everything she needs.

• Check school bags every night for letters.
• Have a calendar on the fridge for non-uniform days etc.
• if your child is joining reception class, put a spare pair of pants and shorts at the bottom of his bag.
• label everything
• arrange a backup person to do after school collection. Pair up with another mum, and then tell the school about the arrangement.
• Expect your dc to be exhausted for the first couple of weeks, so early to bed.
• Expect the same in the last couple of week before Xmas.

I always found “what was the best thing you did today and what was the worst?” a good way to find out what they had done and if any issues.

Make sure they know school is a long term thing not just for a day or week!

Speak to teacher about any major issues but don’t be constantly bending their ear or expect instant responses or you will be “that parent”. Be nice to school admin staff as they are the ones with the power to help you or to block you!

Don’t agree to join the PTA committee without sussing them out first eg by offering to help at an event. Ditto making friends at school gate - be friendly to everyone but worry if someone seems to want to be your best friend immediately!

Vanish Gold works wonders but it’s also ok to send them in a slightly stained top - otherwise will cost you a fortune. You do though need at least two cardies / jumpers / PE shorts as they will lose them.

Always aim to get there early to allow for the inevitable loo trip, lost shoe, tantrum etc. Same when you pick them up if you have younger DC to get out of the door.

Don’t organise to much after school as they need downtime and can be exhausted. And don’t expect to get loads done without them as time between drop off and pick up goes twice as fast as you expect!

Label everything and please get them a water bottle that is easy to open and refill, label and won’t leak. If you do get a lunchbox, get one that is easy to open. Get extra cardigans/jumpers because even if they are labelled they will still get lost. Get everything ready the night before. You’re morning routine will develop quickly and then probably be set in stone for the rest of the primary school years- you’ll be excellent at knowing the best moment to leave the house every morning.
Keep a pinboard for the top bit of letters. You may need a stock of envelopes for money and slip returns. Be prepared for them to come home starving hungry and exhausted and looking as though they’ve been dragged through a hedge.

School dinners might be different to normal so check the website. Some schools are having them delivered to the classroom and there is less choice. The term’s menu should be available to view.

Stickins labels are great and will stick to clothings, shoes, lunchboxes etc. www.stikins.co.uk/ You can get similar from other companies that can include a picture or a colour if they can’t yet recognise their name.

Buy shares in Vanish.

Learn your phonics. Makes helping with their reading a lot easier.
If you send them with packed lunch, make sure they can open everything.
Accept whiteboard pens stain.
Be happy and positive on the outside even if you are worried inside.
Expect them to be tired. This isn't the term to start swimming lessons etc. Conversely, also expect them to need to run off energy... But it's a short amount of energy. My younger daughter regularly napped on the school bus home (along with the other 4-5yos, and some of the older ones!)

School dinners definitely help reduce your stress. Or have two lunch boxes for when they leave one at school!
Label everything.
Expect in reception to need a whole new uniform every day.
Expect them to loose things.
Don't expect regular indvidaualised communication from teacher. You'll only get this at parents evening /school reports or if there's a problem.
Don't ask what did you do today - you won't get a proper answer instead ask what was your favourite /worst thing that happened today / who did you play with / what was the best thing you learnt etc. We go round the table at tea time and everyone says something they did at school which helps start conversations.
I was upset on dc first day spent all day worrying collected him and he'd loved it try not to worry about them it seems most parents suffer more than the dc!
Decide how involved you want to be with school /pta/governors etc and don't feel pressured by other parents. I was publicly shamed in the playground for not baking (I was 34 weeks with twins, working ft and a single parent it wasn't a priority) you decide what you want to do /what you can manage. I was at one point for many years on the pta/school volunteer but only for the years it fitted in with my family.
Have a dressing up box, change for bake sales etc and Christmas jumper at the ready.
Deal with all letters as they come in then set reminders on your phone to prompt you.
Be ready for your whole day to be geared around school drop off /pick up.
The first half term they will be very grumpy and it's not uncommon for them to fall asleep after school so don't book loads of after school activities.
They will be starving when they come out of school have snacks ready.
Enjoy the new phase of parenting.

Sistema twist and sip water bottles are pretty leakproof.

Don’t be conned into buying anything from Smiggle as it is overpriced rubbish that will fall to pieces in a fortnight.

I’m a reception TA, if you’re in England teach your child how to zip up their own coat, especially given the current pandemic.
Teach them how to use a knife and fork and I would say yes to school lunches. Our staff are extremely good with getting children to try something and will always get a sandwich for them as a last resort.
Also, agree to labelling everything!

Make sure you get your phone number and email address right on any communication forms (I'm blaming DHs crap handwriting for that one). And update any changes.

Check what the lu ch menu is, ours looks to be very limited come Sept as they are aiming for a lunch which can be bagged up and then to the classroom, no plates/cutlery to collect and was afterwards.

They don't get a huge amount of time to wat, so if you are going for a packed lunch keep it simple and quick to eat, sandwich or equivalent, some chopped fruit and perhaps a treat thing. My illusions of nicely prepared veg sticks and dips were short lived!

First couple of weeks mine were really tired, a snack after school to keep them going, then an early dinner and bed. Helped if I could get meal prep done before picking them up so I could spend a bit of time with them when we got home. Nothing wrong with a bit of downtime with cartoons though.

Another TA here, label EVERYTHING. This includes all PE kit, trainers, shoes, forest school kit, waterproofs, wellies, hats, gloves etc.

Yes to encouraging as much independence in the clothing department as possible.

Also, if you can, teach your child to cough/sneeze into their elbow and wash their hands properly- we do it too, but kids often need reminders, and it’s easier if it’s been taught at home to start with.

Definitely start with school dinners if that’s your long term preference.

As soon as the letter comes with upcoming school events take a photo of it so you know that the “wear something spotty” day is looming

Ahh I knew I could count on you lot! We’ve been practicing opening packets and she’s down with zips etc. Although that reminds me we need to wear new shoes around house as the buckle is a bit stiff for her.

She likes the idea of a packed lunch but DH pointed out if that can be avoided...

Going for a half hr tour of school with her tomorrow, she’s been quite excited but the nerves seem to be creeping in, so yes advice to manage my emotions is helpful! It’s a big deal isn’t it. I’m confident she’ll be grand but it’s hard knowing she’ll be facing challenges as well as all the good bits. Tonight she said she was worried she couldn’t read yet and was surprised when I explained that was the point of going. And asked if she could come home for lunch. I spoke about how fun lunchtime will be and how she’ll want to play with her friends and she said ‘but I don’t love my friends as much as I love you’

Will defo try and have dinner ready to prepare for time together/deal with tantrums etc for first few weeks, I remember that well from starting nursery.

Thanks so much everyone - will read these again!

Check they can dress from clothes that they have taken off. I mean not folded neatly. Can they turn sleeves the right way in, work out how to find the front and back of every item.
Also don't be concerned it they come home inside out and so on.

Take a photo of any school letter on your phone so you’ve got the details to hand. The second you get a ‘mufti day’ or class trip letter write it on your calendar. Buy some envelopes if you don’t keep them in the house for returning permission slips etc.

See if there’s a Facebook or twitter page for the school. They often remind you of events coming up.

Lay everything out the night before. School bag packed and by the door with shoes and coat. Whole uniform laid out on a hanger or radiator.

Pop some spare pants in the bottom of their bag just in case. Even the most infallibility dry kids can have a slip up in reception. School will lend trousers/skirt but it helps if they have their own undies.

Take a snack for the journey home. Mine came out starving and was a little goblin if he wasn’t fed.

The most important advice anyone gave me was make friends with the receptionist. Buy them chocolates at Christmas and appreciate them. They tend to get overlooked but they do a great job and they can make your life a lot easier.

If she will sit and listen to her teacher, everything else will come.
Check her head every friday after school for the dreaded nits.
Probably easiest to have 5 polo shirts, 5 dresses, 5 cards. As they will come home filthy.
Look at trousers for a girl too. My dd prefers to have her legs covered
If your dd wears tights, make sure she has socks in her PE kit.
Dont put "best" trainers in PE kit. Some schools ask for PE kit to stay in school for the whole term!
Ours sent it home every friday.
Coat. Get a chunky sharpie and write their name in GIANT letters inside both sleeves.
Surprised how many coats got lost or stolen.
If you can, buy one logo polo and cardi. Get the rest as plain from supermarket as much cheaper to replace due to food stains and art things.

No need for iron on labels that gradually come off in the wash. A sharpie pen is all you need - on everything

If she will sit and listen to her teacher, everything else will come. Hmm, I have my doubts on this but hope it’ll be ok!! Only 15 in class which is fab.

Like the receptionist tip!

What is a mufti day?!

I’ve only bought plimsolls for indoor shoes and assumed they’d do for pe, do I need better trainers for that?

Mufti is own clothes.

Taking turns at games was a skill we were asked for.

School lunch all the way. I’m gutted that DS1’s Junior School don’t have a kitchen so I’ll have to make packed lunches.